Part of what makes a reception is really the people invited. If you’re inviting a bunch of great aunts and uncles and not many peers, it’s a different vibe than inviting lots of young people who want to dance, for example.
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I know, right?! This reception ended up lasting until midnight. The food service was just about the last thing. While my friends and I thought it was a disaster, my friend the bride thought it was the best wedding ever, and we all happily went along with it. So glad the bride and groom were clueless about it.
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This! 
I was talking to a young lady recently who told me her “sad” wedding dress story. She went to a second hand wedding dress place and got a lovely dress for $900, so she was thrilled. BUT, once it was too late to do anything about it, she found out altering was going to cost $1100. I felt really bad for her, because they are trying to have a nice wedding and not spend much money, but went way over for the dress.
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I’m no one to talk because I can’t sew at all, and I know wedding dresses take a lot more skill than regular alterations. But, I think that our high schools should go back to emphasizing some life skills classes, like sewing, cooking, basic home repairs (cars have gotten too complicated), and financial literacy. A girl I went to HS with sewed her own wedding dress, and it was beautiful.
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I was so nervous about the alterations! My daughter’s dress had a lot of lace & adornments. It fit her pretty well off the rack but they still needed to do the bustle, take off some length and nip it at the waist. Still, I wanna say it was around $4-500. If the dress is intricate, you really want to go to someone who knows what they are doing.
I feel like wedding dress designers and manufacturers can do a better job constructing the dresses to not have so much extra fabric - especially in the length, or have regular, short and tall versions, since ordering takes so many months anyway.
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Apparently the dress she selected has 5 layers and they all need to be hemmed. I asked why she couldn’t just cut some of the inside ones, and not actually hem them, but that may be a stupid idea. She also mentioned something about needing embroidery. I’d be very hesitant to get an embroidered dress where someone would need to match embroidery, but maybe it’s normal. My DIL was lucky enough to fit right into a sample dress, and I have no idea how much I paid for alterations back in the 80s. I do remember they “made me” order a larger dress than it seemed like I needed, and then of course it had to be taken in in multiple places.
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My daughter cut one of her gowns.
She had a small local wedding and a destination wedding
Her destination wedding dress was made to order but the local dress had tulle layers which she cut to length. She knew she was never going to wear the dress again. She also ran out of time to get it altered which is very on brand. 
I wonder if it would be easier to buy another dress that fits, I understand the appeal of buying a dress that has only been worn once but it might be cheaper to buy another dress than alter the dress she tried to save money with.
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If she’s in the Portland area, message me for the name of a fabulous seamstress who thinks outside the box. (Unless, of course, this wedding has already taken place.)
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Honestly, if the dress is intricate (as it sounds like from the additional post, with embroidery…), the alteration time (and skill)…
She would be pretty unrealistic to think she could potentially get a bargain (less than a few hundred dollars) on alternations if the dress was not a close fit.
$2,000 for a wonderful wedding dress is not out of line. My daughter’s (saving from direct from designer in Italy) - we added wanting the veil of the same lace – and that was true savings too because of what places charge for veils - in 2017 we paid about $1,700 (dress and veil). At the time David’s (chain store bridal, lower cost end), their most expensive gown was $2,000. Since we had DD’s dress made to measure (could only return if it was in a standard size) - I told DD we would not have time to get another dress so it had to work - it fit her perfectly, no alternations needed. I had DD try on dresses at David’s, and we purchased foundation items there - and I also found my dress (I may have ordered online but saw the dress there); the seasoned clerk told us DD’s designer/web site was legit too.
I bought my dress off the rack and it fit pretty well (not perfectly). It was in mid 1980s. It was supposed to be altered but the alterations really didn’t do what they were supposed to so I wasn’t charged. It fit fine anyway and all told I paid $149 + tax, I think. I used my sister’s veil and it was perfect.
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Alterations can be very expensive depending on what is involved. Kid 2 paid $500 to an amazing seamstress recommended by the boutique where she got her gown. She also paid close to $300 to have her dress professionally cleaned (venue was a farm with grass and dirt and all). The dress is hanging in my closet. Kid wanted to get rid of it, but after giving birth to a girl, she changed her mind. That baby girl is now a “big kid” and is very much interested in fancy princess dresses. 
So the dress might be used for play clothing soon (nevermind the size!).
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I would literally think about cutting the interior layers. She will be taking care of our cats soon, and I may talk a little more with her about the dress then. I will also likely see her mom soon, and can get more intel.
Aww thanks. Opposite coast, unfortunately.
One of my cousins is very artistic, and she took a very plain, inexpensive bridal dress and added fur trim to it. It was gorgeous, and very inexpensive. Only mentioning it because maybe a David’s Bridal dress can be reimagined with less work than the big alterations job?
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My daughter went without a veil because of how crazy expensive they were. She got married outside and also didn’t want it blowing around in the breeze.
I can’t remember if I posted about this already but my BFF’s DIL repurposed her mom’s wedding dress and wore it. Her mom got married in the 90’s (like me) so full-on puffy shoulders, full skirt, shiny material, etc., We were curious about how it would look - her DIL is tall and absolutely stunning and could have worn any of the current styles. She did just enough with it to take away the 90’s while still retaining the look of when her mom wore it! Such a sweet and memorable thing to do!
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Just went to a wedding that had the most sensational food. Reception was pasta bar, poke bar, charcuterie table, and station with dumplings and sushi. Plenty of bartenders though this was not a big drinking crowd. dinner was choice of filet or sea bass.
The music was fantastic to me. Others might not have liked it. . Mostly songs the B and G grew up with. It was a DJ accompanied by live instruments….a new trend here. If you didn’t follow current Gen Z trends you’d be surprised by some of their choices like Billy Joel’s Vienna which has had a renewed resurgence with Gen Z. I loved the little DJ “jokes” like playing Party in the USA and then morphing to Crazy in Love ( right after the lyric…”And a Jay Z song was on”) Or playing Olivia Rodrigo’s Deja Vu and then Uptown Girl. If you know, you know. ( say how much you love her in between the chorus and the verse)
The other songs were mostly what I call “Act ‘em out” like Love Story , Mr Brightside, Low, Drop Dead ( a very much used wedding song right now….which is wedding appropriate and Stop the Wedding….which is not but alot of fun. ).
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I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences with Thursday weddings!
We are in Southern California, where wedding venue prices are absolutely outrageous. We found a beautiful ocean-view venue that my daughter absolutely loves, and the price fits nicely within her budget. The only catch is that the only dates available for the next year are Thursdays.
It would be a summer wedding, before school starts, but most of the guests would be traveling from the East Coast. I’m trying to figure out how much of an issue a Thursday wedding would be for guests, especially those who would need to fly in and take time off work. On the other hand, a summer wedding might make travel a little easier for some families.
My daughter says she truly cannot imagine getting married at another venue. She loves the ocean view, and we have looked at enough places to know how difficult it is to find something she loves that also fits her budget.
For those of you who have attended or hosted a Thursday wedding, how did it work out? Did guests have a hard time making it? Would you consider it an unreasonable ask for out-of-town guests? Would you go with the venue she loves or keep looking for a Friday or Saturday option?
I would really appreciate honest opinions, especially from anyone who has planned a wedding with most guests traveling from out of state. Thank you!
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I worried that a Friday wedding would be an issue for guests, but it was not. Everyone D & SIL invited that they reasonably expected might come was able to attend - they gave people a good heads-up with save-the-dates. Thursday could be a problem for some, but honestly … if it’s what the bride & groom really want, they should go for it. It seems like younger people are a lot more supportive of what older folks might consider alternative options for receptions.
Heck, back when H & I got married, Saturday was an issue for some of our invitees because we worked at a manufacturing facility that had mandatory overtime on weekends. We were disappointed that some of our coworkers couldn’t come (the second shift folks), but it’s impossible to find the perfect date for everyone.
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I would leave it totally up to the bride! I would just remind her that it is likely her peers that would have the most difficulty with the traveling and taking days off and if she’s OK with that, I would go with it!
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