I saw a lot of that (civil ceremony plus big wedding/party the next year) during Covid. I expect the trend to continue. Couples are often living together in engagement, and being married sometimes comes with benefit such as medical coverage (or in one case for friend’s kid - military housing).
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My nephew and his wife got married at city hall last December. They had a small family lunch that day. We were told they would have a wedding/reception in the near future. His parents already gave him 50% of the wedding costs. It’s almost a year and we haven’t heard a peep. We’ve asked my brother a few times and he doesn’t know when. Non of us have given them their wedding present (money) yet. I am not sure at this point if they would still have a wedding.
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I hope that all couples can push forward with what is most important to them and with a budget that works for them or their families, whoever is paying. What is their priority? Better venue? Bigger crowd? Fancy food? Using the $ for a house down payment instead? A more exciting honeymoon?
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My son had a very small wedding during COVID, with fewer than 25 people, and he still talks about how lucky they were to have had such an intimate wedding thankfully to all the restrictions on guest counts at the time.
He was paying for the wedding and asked his wife whether she would rather have a huge engagement ring or a big wedding. She chose the ring! They ended up getting married on a Thursday at a beautiful venue in a valley, with only immediate family invited and no plus-ones.
Looking back, I think my DIL chose wisely. She absolutely loves her ring, which cost about as much as the big wedding itself, and they still have beautiful wedding photos and wonderful memories of their day. It really reinforced for me that a wedding doesn’t have to be large or on a Saturday to be special and meaningful.
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Practical me feels like a lavish wedding or expensive engagement ring are both not necessary, but my kids… My son went with a lab diamond for the engagement ring (his fiancé wanted to go that route, it was “only” around $8000) but her parents are paying for the reception. They will be paying for the DJ and flowers at the very least.
I’m all for people doing whatever affordable (to them) choice makes them happy.
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One niece delayed her wedding a whole year because of Covid, and had the full wedding intended the year later. She was living with her fiancé as soon as he proposed. Five bridesmaids were not part of the bridal party the year later (she originally had 12) - changing life plans and possibly moved significantly out of the area.
DH and I used all our leave time for his first brother’s east coast wedding by including some extra time with relatives and visiting a few states; and for the second brother’s east coast wedding some years later, we spent a little less time and tighter flight times.
For the first wedding, I had a low-cost full-length dress – we were in our years with house poor. The second I purchased a more costly dress at a bridal store.
Now, one can do so much shopping on-line, and IMHO lower flight costs with planning.
IMHO, a lot of advance communication and planning, one tries to make it good for guests to want to attend and also be flexible for the dates.
I like the feedback about being in-tune to what works for guests.
It’s funny—my sis (MOG) and the new in-laws (MOB) wore the exact same style and brand of dress to the wedding. Sister’s was in plain lavender, her favorite color. MOB’s was green with spangles/sequins/sparkles. They did NOT coordinate, but just ended up that way. Dress was cute on both of of them and neither was upset.
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