<p>I had to laugh. My daughter dated a boy that we could not understand why she stayed with for 2 years. The initial attraction we could understand - film star good looks - shallow I know but even we were a bit bowled over at first. That smile could light up a room. But it soon became apparent to us that he was not a nice person ( that smile very rarely made an appearance) plus had a terrible temper and major mood swings and was nightmarishly jealous and possessive and terrifyingly controlling. We were in despair that she put up with what she put up with. They broke up a while back but she had stayed friends - he was as awful a friend as he had been a boyfriend. All of a sudden she is completely done with him (yay). I asked why.</p>
<p>Her:“I realized I don’t like him as a human being”.</p>
<p>I have learned the hard way that whenever my very gifted, but inexperienced, 19 year old daughter says, “Dad, I’m an adult, I know what I’m doing,” that disaster is just around the corner . . .</p>
<p>when my D was about 8; “Mom…you don’t understand me… you’ve never understood me!”</p>
<p>About 5, playing soccer. Swarms of kids running in groups up and down the pitch. My D stands there, in the middle. “D” I ask, “why aren’t you running?” D says “They’ll be back!”</p>
<p>If we’re going back to little kids and sports:
Son was about 3, watching NFL football with dad. Dad had explained that one team wanted to move the ball one way, and the other team wanted to move the ball the other way. </p>
<p>“Dad, are those poor people?”</p>
<p>H, worried about S’s lack of exposure to African-americans in our small community (basically just the people on Sesame Street).
“No, they aren’t poor people, why do you think they are?”</p>
<p>“If they could buy another football, both teams could be happy.”</p>
<p>Had one just the other day w/ my 17 yo DS. He HAPPENED to be grocery shopping w/ me (amazing, I know!) and I was showing him the frozen waffles I’d been buying which were the cheaper brand & wanted him to tell me if he liked them okay comapred to the more expensive brand.</p>
<p>He said, “Those are a dollar cheaper? Wow - they taste like they’re only about 25 CENTS cheaper!”</p>
<p>I dunno if it comes over on this forum - but it struck me as hilarious at the time (maybe I was just giddy b/c he was actually grocery shopping w/ me!). :)</p>
<p>woooo I haven’t heard that one for years, Violadad.<br>
My grandma was heavier than she wanted to be. Sometimes we encouraged her to diet. She’d always respond it was easier to complain about it than to diet!.</p>
<p>When my now-tall child was a small child of six and wanted a pet, he and I talked about it, did some reading, and decided on gerbils. We learned they were social animals, and we’d have to get at least two. Before we went to the pet store, I asked S if he had decided on names for the gerbils we were going to get. “Yes, Mom! Sam and Leon!”</p>
<p>“Good names!,” I told him. “But what if they are girl gerbils? Will you name them ‘Samantha’ and ‘Leona’, or something else?,” I asked.</p>
<p>The kid looked at me as though I were crazy, and said, “Sam and Leon! I’m going to name them Sam and Leon. It’s not going to matter to the gerbils, Mom!”</p>
<p>This thread is cathartic. I’m sitting at my desk laughing so hard I just snorted tea through my nose. The 25 cents cheaper just killed me. I’m still laughing at that one.</p>
<p>Here’s my contribution: My little guy was a slow talker and is an easy-going and sweet natured person. We were worried about the speech issue, imagining all sorts of possibilities. I spoke to the doctor at his two-year checkup and he wasn’t speaking yet so I wanted tests. My very wise, almost rabbinical, pediatrician told us that he didn’t think there was a problem although he would arrange tests, but he wanted in the meanwhile for us to stop reading the baby’s mind and anticipating his every wish. The doctor was convinced that he was lazy and spoiled by his doting parents and adoring sisters. So a couple of days later baby pointed at the cookies and I kept saying to him “tell mommy you want a cookie” “do you want a cookie” over and over again in that sickeningly-sweet voice. He was getting more and more frustrated and grabbed for the cookie and I said again “do you want a cookie?” He finally had enough and spewed at me in an exorcist-like voice “NO I WANT TWO COOKIES” while holding up two fingers. We did not have him tested.</p>
<p>^^ Funny & great story z-mom. A shock & a relief at the same time!</p>
<p>Here’s one -
When my now 20 yo DS was about 10 or so, he had created a big robot out of duplo blocks. He was a friend’s house & didn’t realize the t.v. was slanted on top, so when he set the robot down, it slipped off the back & the head came off. As he picked up the pieces, I said, “Now see if you can duplicate the feat!”.</p>
<p>And he replied, “Momma! It was the head that broke!”.</p>
<p>S2 was a talker, non-stop. He would talk incessantly. We warned him that he’d have to control himself in school or he would get in trouble, and he managed to. One day I picked him up from elementary school (he must have been 6 or 7), and in the car on the way home he talked and talked and talked. At one point, he said something that I thought called for a response. In a disgusted voice, he said, “Mom, I’m talking to MYSELF.”</p>