Accepted to Princeton for REA (with good aid as well) but my mom thinks I'm jeopardizing my future if I don't still apply to Yale and Harvard

Applying to College
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Just to address the legacy thing briefly:

These days, most legacy admits to these colleges, like you, are very well-qualified academically. Princeton actually provides some useful evidence on this issue in the form of their incoming Frosh Surveys published by the Daily Princetonian. Specifically, if you look at the Academics section, Testing subsection, you can do some legacy/non-legacy comparisons:

Legacies skew more consistently high scoring than non-legacies. Indeed, these colleges sometimes argue their data shows legacy admits who have such high academic qualifications are particularly good bets to do well in their courses, which is part of why they like to admit them.

To the extent legacy helps, then, it is observably more in the sense that these colleges get a lot more applicants who are highly-qualified academically than they can admit. Non-academic factors are then what cuts that bigger pool down to a much smaller admit pool, and legacy is a non-academic factor that can help you survive that cut.

But not because as a high numbers legacy you are a worse bet to do well academically. If anything, more the opposite.

So personally, I don’t think a high numbers legacy admit to these colleges needs to worry about being competitive academically. If you are lacking anything, it might be some sort of non-academic activity or essay or so on that really stood out, which is how high numbers non-legacies would likely have managed to survive that same cut instead.

But even if so, lacking a non-academic distinguishing factor is not going to be a negative indicator for academic performance.

Edit: Oh, and in case this wasn’t clear, I also vote for you being done and just enjoying the rest of your senior year. It is an enviable position to be in, you should feel great about it, and you should squeeze all the benefit out of it that you can.

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I agree. Princeton has everything you want. Your concerns about Yale are second hand and unfounded.

It sounds like YOU are ready to move on from college applications, and the only real reason you would apply to Yale is because of a family connection.

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Also the funny thing is your mother was worried about Princeton not being as strong as Harvard or Yale for law school applications. But according to your post your dad went to Princeton undergrad and Yale law school….

Don’t waste time and energy on a Yale application. You are obviously an outstanding student and a great young lady. Princeton REA admission is an incredible accomplishment.

Congratulations.

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Delete Yale. Nobody….nobody knows what will happen at any school. Some go to their dream and are miserable. Others go to the one they least want to go …maybe for affordability…and can’t imagine going anywhere else looking back.

You have an incredible opportunity and hopefully it works. Go forth, be yourself, and have an open mind. Hopefully it will be everything you dream.

Everyone walks in with nerves and everyone is the same - needing to make friends, find study partners, etc.

For some it’ll click. For others maybe not - but you can’t tell from a piece of paper or from perceptions. You are so well researched and have such pointed arguments that this journey is meant to be started.

So start at Princeton and have no apprehension. And hopefully in four years you’ll look back and be like wow !! That was awesome !!!

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None of us can tell you anything more impactful than this. Congrats. Go make the best of the opportunities in front of you.

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My son (Princeton '22) was a pre-med, supposedly one of the more competitive tracks to be in at Princeton. Yet, his experience there wasn’t anything like that. Of course, he had to study hard to keep up with the rigorous curriculum, but he never described the environment as competitive. If anything, it was collaborative, rather. I’m sure there is a degree of competitiveness at Princeton, but I do not believe it’s at any higher level that’d make Princeton distinct from its peers.

Your concerns regarding exclusivity/elitism and preppiness are very true of the Princeton’s past but not the Princeton of today. The Eating Clubs were founded by the scions of super wealthy and became such a powerful presence on campus that the wars waged to eliminate them by then president Woodrow Wilson ended up in abject failure. Their presence was so powerful as the social hub of the wealthy that the attempts to establish the university’s first student center didn’t even get to succeed until the year 2000. By today, however, they serve merely as optional, co-ed social/dining clubs open to all juniors and seniors with dwindling number of clubs still requiring the bickering process. Some Eating Clubs have struggled financially in recent years to stay afloat. It’s just the remnants of their powerful symbol remains. There are no vestiges of “preppiness” to be found at Princeton today, either. When you go to the Preview Day, as I’m sure you will, it’s like the whole class is made up of one socio-economic class, and that’s the way it looks the rest of undergrad years. Those reports you’ve heard are from the old past Princeton.

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Haha, yep! He graduated in the 80s which was pre-deflation, so she thought it wouldn’t be the same.

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Parent of S24 here. Only you know your family circumstances and whether applying and getting accepted will make everything harder or not applying at all will make things harder at home. That seems to me to be the main question. For what it’s worth, I was pressured by my Asian parents into attending Harvard, and I did. I had a good experience there, but, honestly, I’m still a little bitter about the whole issue. I have been determined to respect my son’s wishes as he goes through this process. Congratulations on your acceptance to Princeton!

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Order the sweatshirt and wear it proudly! It’s time to go forward and celebrate this tremendous achievement. Go with your heart, it’s clear as day which school is calling to you. This is your life, your journey. Princeton is phenomenal school. Huge congratulations!

And as a side note, you’re not my daughter, but I think I can speak for a lot of us here in saying we are proud of you for not only receiving a Princeton acceptance but having the courage to advocate for yourself by speaking to your mother.

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Eh…if you’re not totally sure about Princeton and want to apply to Yale, just to see, go for it. But it doesn’t sound like your heart’s really in it. I think the student bodies of the schools are quite similar (each will have preppy kids from posh NE boarding schools but neither college is defined by that culture at this point.) You’re likely to find that you are well prepared academically for either school, especially if you’re already a strong writer (this, in my experience, was the skill that set apart the kids from top public/private schools from the rest of their classmates back in the 90s. But most of us caught up quickly.)

I didn’t experience Princeton as super competitive – the study culture was fairly collaborative, even for pre-med students. I think the socializing has evolved significantly since I was a student (e.g. the university used to turn a blind eye to underage drinking and freshmen were welcome at all the eating clubs on the weekends and rarely if ever carded. At recent reunions it looked like they’d tightened this up significantly.) I did appreciate that most social life happened on campus/the street – there wasn’t a bar or clubbing culture – which meant that I didn’t need to spend money to go out (as a kid on significant financial aid, I’d have had a tougher time in Cambridge or Boston or New York.)

I think you’re making too much of the legacy angle. My understanding is that being a legacy can help in edge cases (two similar students) and there’s a lot of correlation between legacy status and a bunch of other things that give kids an admissions edge (e.g. money to spend on college prep and academic support and extracurriculars…excellence in recruitable sports…strong family emphasis on academics from a young age…general application savvy…and, sometimes, $$$$ donations, etc.) But being an ordinary legacy (the child of a parent who has dutifully donated a normal amount of money every year) won’t get you across the line if you aren’t already super qualified. W/R/T Yale, I don’t think that YLS parentage counts as legacy status. Someone else might correct me (I’m not going to google it).

ETA the one thing to check is how competitive SPIA is. When I was a student it was the one major that was competitive, and since I’d faffed around a lot freshman year and made a bunch of Bs, I was likely not going to cut it. But given how focused you are, I bet you’ll be fine.

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Sorry, I haven’t read all the posts above, but I am a Yale Law graduate and have some thoughts. First, law schools like Harvard and Yale do not want to accept a class made up of Harvard and Yale undergraduates, they want diversity. I went to a state school in New Jersey undergraduate , but my family also includes a Princeton grad who went on to Harvard Law. Second, Princeton graduates are playing important roles in every major law firm in the United States. I’m including a link below to a page from the Cravath website that should take you to a list of Princeton graduates at at the firm that also shows where they went to law school. Cravath is just one firm, but it is an undeniably elite firm, so maybe your mom would find this type of evidence persuasive. You could also point out that two of the current nine justices sitting on the US Supreme Court - Sonia Sotomayor and Samuel Alito - are Princeton University/Yale Law grads. Personally, I don’t see any reason why you would want to apply to Yale and Harvard when you already have the acceptance from Princeton and Princeton was your first choice. https://www.cravath.com/people/index.html?sc=5455

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“sabotage your H/Y application (putting H/Y in the wrong essay will do it) and accept to waste $150”

That’s really not a good idea, outside of being deceptive, if someone who has the caliber of application to get into Princeton REA, admissions may overlook that as a typo.

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Seems like your dad would be a great resource for your situation.

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Hey everyone! Thank you so much for all of the kind and helpful responses. I talked it over with my parents again, and ended up deciding that not submitting the other applications is the right move, so it looks like I will almost definitely be committing to Princeton!!

We’re visiting family in NYC over midwinter break, so I will get to take the train down to Princeton and visit my former debate partner who is a current student there, and talk to some of his friends who are planning to go into SPIA as well (and it will also be a chance for me to experience the NJ winter). I’m super excited to be a Tiger in the fall!

Also, if anyone has suggestions for the best brands of warm winter coats/good shoes for the snow, that would be great! My birthday is coming up so I might ask for good cold weather clothes in order to avoid turning into an icicle on the steps of Nassau Hall or something.

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This thread is over a year old…but might give you some good tips.

I would suggest taking some layers with you…fleece, hoodies, etc. and then see what’s up and buy what you want. You won’t freeze in Princeton before Thanksgiving (usually).

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Huge congratulations! This post made my day. So nice to see a young person take control of their future and go with their heart! I bet your parents must be super proud of you. Go tigers!

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I’m so excited for you!
It’s been a longish time since I wintered in Princeton but I remember it being cold but not Maine/Minnesota cold. Layers are good, because sometimes the classrooms get quite warm. At the time I wore a wool parka (pea coat), wool sweaters, Bean boots. I think rain is more common than snow, so whatever you get should be waterproof (feet) and at least water-resistant (the rest of you). But I think you’ll have a good month between when you arrive and when you need winter gear that exceeds whatever you’d wear in California, and I second the advice of the person who said to shop when you get there. There are decent options in town and mail-order is way easier than it used to be.
If you’re thinking about a celebratory purchase, I’d suggest a bike (one that you’re comfortable riding around in inclement weather and leaving locked up outside) + a really solid lock. It’s not a super hilly campus so you can probably get away with something like this: M7 (internally geared, mixte frame that you can gracefully mount even in a skirt, fenders, and you can add a rack for bringing stuff with you/grocery shopping/etc.)
Rah-rah-rah-tiger-tiger-tiger-sis-sis-sis-boom-boom-boom-ba! '28! '28! '28! (holy crap now I feel old.)

ETA: I like this website for evaluating gear and they seem to have some more-affordable-than-Canada-Goose recommendations: The 10 Best Winter Jackets for Women

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Congratulations! That must be such a relief!

This week in is the coldest it’s been so far, and it’s 25 right now but has been in the 30s mostly. We had flurries for 10 minutes yesterday afternoon. Princeton police sent out a warning email about snow squalls (via nixle.com)

I wouldn’t spend a ton on winter gear yet. Get layers. Maybe a packable down jacket. Maybe a vest if that’s your style. A good waterproof, breathable shell. There’s an REI 10 minutes away.