Adult "Chance Me!"

Parent Cafe
41

<p>Thanks for a really good laugh! I can’t compete at humor with Schmaltz, though I am enjoying making up a personal list of high reaches down to safeties (including the April lament, “But losing 15 pounds was my SAFETY! Now what am I going to do?”)</p>

42

<p>“Match:
Schmaltz will make most posters here laugh, but some stick in the mud will take offense at one of his quips.”</p>

<p>Thanks, Jym. No better example of that than posts #7, 8, and 9 here: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/966691-egg-white-salad.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/966691-egg-white-salad.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

43

<p>Extreme safety: I will trip over something/fall down some stairs within the next year.
Low match: My hair will undergo a wind-related explosion shortly, or the next time I’m outside. (Sometime in the next six months. ;))
Reach: Find a job. :frowning:
Extreme reach: Will not get lost on Aug. 26.</p>

<p>Notice anything about the relative locations of positive and negative statements in that list? :D</p>

44

<p>Well, Schmaltz, you make me laugh and I loved the white crackers crack. Redundant though.</p>

45

<p>Good luck at Berkeley, Leafblade. I hope you enjoy it there, even though it’s a stone-cold-community-college-style-open-admissions safety that you will have more facetime with homeless guys your first day there than you will with all of their much-touted Nobel laureates even if you end up in the class of '16.</p>

<p>Also beware of trying too hard to fit in. I never went to UCB, but I used to live around there when I was in my early 20’s. One day I found myself in a very large and very very hip coffee bar on Telegraph Ave. The huge menu behind the counter featured all sorts of exotic drinks with Spanish and Italian names…Mocha this, Cappuccino that. This was long before Starbucks, and a rookie like me had no idea what any of them were. I ordered the cheapest thing on the menu, which I NOW know must have been something like “Leche Caliente.” Looking hip in Berkeley is hard enough. Take my word for it, it’s absolutely impossible if you’re sitting amid a throng of neo-hippies sipping your glass of…warm milk.</p>

46

<p>LOL schmaltz!! Those egg white salad posts still have me chuckling…</p>

<p>Safety:
That I will be a pest , in DS’s eyes… now that he is moving back to the metro area.</p>

<p>High reach:
That I will be invited to his place for dinner</p>

47

<p>jym, if you make a generous contribution to the dinner endowment fund, the high reach might become a reach or even a match! ;)</p>

48

<p>BB-
Good plan! The apartment he just rented is right by a very pricey restaurant that is out of his budget… but maybe, just maybe we can offer merit-based aid :)</p>

49

<p>A few minutes ago I really really tried to start a serious thread: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/969305-there-nuance-studying-colleges-your-kid-cant-quite-grasp.html#post1065326597[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/969305-there-nuance-studying-colleges-your-kid-cant-quite-grasp.html#post1065326597&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>But like Tony Montana said, everybody’s safety school seems to be “when you try to get out, they just keep dragging you back in…”</p>

50

<p>Sorry, but can’t let that slide. You were papaphrasing Pacino as Michael Corleone, not Tony Montana. I hope you didn’t use that in your essay…</p>

51

<p>Thanks for the correction. I knew the one Pacino movie it WASN’T from was the one in which he played Dr. Kevorkian.</p>