<p>SEATTLE Blaming teachers for low test scores, poor graduation rates and the other ills of American schools has been popular lately, but a new survey wags a finger closer to home.</p>
<p>An Associated Press-Stanford University Poll on education found that 68 percent of adults believe parents deserve heavy blame for what’s wrong with the U.S. education system more than teachers, school administrators, the government or teachers unions.</p>
<p>Only 35 percent of those surveyed agreed that teachers deserve a great deal or a lot of the blame. Moms were more likely than dads 72 percent versus 61 percent to say parents are at fault. Conservatives were more likely than moderates or liberals to blame parents.</p>
<p>I don’t see how parents are not to blame. Education starts at home… plain and simple. Even if parents don’t have a high education themselves, they are still responsible for instilling values such as discipline, hard work, and integrity. The problem is that too many parents want the schools to parent as well as teach. Along with that, many will excuse poor performance, behavior, or attitude and then blame “the system” for everything wrong with little Johnny. Shame on them.</p>
<p>I applaud the many parents out there that still take responsibility for their actions and require that their children take responsibility for theirs as well. While I’m sure that there are many wonderful parents doing a terrific job, to deny that the problem exists is simply foolish. Only thing is… what can we do about it? You don’t need a certification to be a mother or father but you do if you want to be a teacher.</p>
<p>I bet if you looked a little deeper, you’d find they are blaming all the <em>other</em> parents. Their own little special snowflakes are pretty much perfect and, by extension, so are they.</p>
<p>It reminds me of how everyone complains about Congress – but re-elect their own guy. Or how everyone judges themselves to be a wonderful driver – it’s all the other jerks on the road.</p>
<p>Parents share most of the blame for poor education in many American schools. A woman who has a child out of wedlock denies her child the most important role model/teacher of all – a parent. A parent who does not begin reading on a daily basis to his or her infant child, denies that child the love and value of learning for a lifetime. A parent who does not attend PTA, sports, or other school functions teaches a child that school is optional. A parent who does not ask if the child has completed his or her homework, denies that child the lesson of hard work and learning. </p>
<p>If you look at those school systems where significant number of children don’t graduate or don’t learn much, you will see single parents who rarely read to their children and have little involvement with the school.</p>
<p>I just read the article…as they say “it takes a village”. The “blame” can’t be places on one or another of the stakeholders. Everyone is involve…parents, friends, teachers, extended family…everyone who has the chance to make a positive impact on a child.</p>
<p>A parent who does not begin reading on a daily basis to his or her infant child, denies that child the love and value of learning for a lifetime.</p>
<p>Sigh- my older daughter taught herself to read when she was three, my younger daughter didn’t read till she was eight. Both had same availability of materials- but while my older daughter would follow along when I guided my finger under the words while I read to her, my younger daughter was overwhelmed by that & would throw the book across the room.</p>
<p>Reading was in how their brains were wired- not because of my lack of parenting skills. ( & they are eight years apart- I had basically same amount of time w each)</p>
<p>One thing that may be bringing this viewpoint (blaming parents) to the forefront is a growing impatience with the problem of seriously disruptive students. These disruptive students often have parents who cannot or will not participate in bringing their child’s behavior under control. It’s one thing to have an apathetic student sleeping in class, and quite another to have an abusive student cursing the teacher and constantly interrupting the lesson.</p>
<p>Sorry Thumper, but while I agree to a certain extent, the idea that “everyone” is responsible is ridiculous. If you have a child, then raising them is your responsibilty. Passing the responsibility to others is where the problem starts. It is one thing to ask for help… quite another to blame others.</p>
<p>I never ask my kids if they’ve done their homework. Yet there is lots of hard work and learning going on. Both my kids hate to procrastinate and get their homework done as soon as they can without my involvement in it.</p>
<p>My point is that saying ONE stakeholder is responsible is not always accurate. Parents DO see their children much more than teachers or anyone else. But other stakeholders in raising a child can have a huge impact too. Yes, discipline begins in the home and good support for this is important for all. Yes, parents can and should support learning with their children. BUT the reality is that if a child comes to school, they might just find a mentor there who sparks their interests and can HELP to turn around any mitigating issues. Some of the mentoring programs (Big Brothers/Big Sisters for example) have helped children who might not otherwise have gotten this positive help.</p>
<p>I’m not saying that the parents don’t hold a huge amount of ability to make changes in a child, but the reality is IF the parents don’t, there are others who can HELP to pick up the slack.</p>
<p>You need additional resources to pick up the slack though. The cost of equalizing to an intact family is considerable as the NJ education experiments have shown. There are many other countries beating us on educational tests that spend far less than we do and they are pulling ahead, even with a fraction of the resources that we have.</p>
<p>I agree that parents are the #1 culprit. But once you get a school to a point where the parents are sufficiently involved, then the biggest culprit is bad teachers and administrators who cannot be fired due to union contracts and government employee rights.</p>
<p>I agree with the poster who talked about discipline. There is an abominal lack of discipline going on. Parents aren’t disciplining. Teachers can’t for fear of lawsuits. The things I see in the stores makes me even grayer than I am. What ever happened to laying down the law. If we’d take a slightly tougher stance with kids from an early age a whole lot more teaching would occur in the classroom. If teachers were allowed to discipline there would be more teaching going on. </p>
<p>Thirty some years ago my mom taught at my HS and I saw tiny her one day with a big high school goofball kid up against a locker giving him heck about something and grabbing him by the ear and “walking” him down to the principal’s office. And everyone was afraid of the principal. He called us young men and young women and heaven forbid you were running or goofing in the hallways between classes. I can still hear his voice yelling at boys that had hats on inside the building. I remember one coach yelling at one kid because he had a dirty shirt on. The kid said his mom hadn’t had time to wash it and the coach just got in his face and asked him if he was a mommy’s boy and hadn’t he learned how to run a washing machine yet. I bet that kid started washing his own uniform. Those would be a lawsuits today by some parents who thought they had a perfect darling. </p>
<p>I hear mom’s with misbehaving young kids saying in a sing-song voice “oh honey don’t do that it makes mommy mad.” What’s wrong with grabbing the kid by the arm, sitting him down right in the store immediately and giving him what-for. Good heavens I had a MOM voice. I used to love to go on a vacation without the kids because my voice modulation would change within 48 hours. I was on a plane once and just cracked up when a mom came on with kids and she had the “mom” voice. Granted when I was young I “feared” the wrath of my parents, or getting in trouble in school…but what’s so wrong with that. We have to follow rules of behavior our entire lives.</p>
<p>Of course the father of the child has absolutely nothing to do with it, and bears no responsibility whatsoever. For certain people, it’s always the woman’s fault no matter what. Amazing.</p>
<p>Wow, Razorsharp. Really? Abortion and/or mandatory marriage are the answers to our education problems? Why not throw in forced sterilization while you are at it? It would certainly mean fewer heathens running around causing education problems.</p>
<p>The number one risk factor for children and their ability to access their education is POVERTY. Is there a correlation between single parent homes and poverty? Yes, of course there is. The problem is not exclusively about the lack of one or the other parent. It is about the level of income and education of the child’s parents. That’s why, Razorsharp, some communities have such low test scores and graduation rates. Because there is a great deal of poverty and that means there is likely to be poor nutrition, maybe a language barrier, perhaps one parent working very hard to put food on the table.</p>
<p>I agree that discipline, in the home, is lacking in a way that it was not years ago. The word discipline means “to teach”. Having age appropriate expectations for kids and having consequences when the are not met has become old fashioned. Believe me, I know. I’m a teacher and I see it all the time.</p>