<p>I hope you can give me advice on an awkward situation. A friend of a friend send me a Facebook request to friend her. I only accept requests from people I know, so I asked my friend if it’s a legit request and she confirmed it was.</p>
<p>Well to make a long story short, we started chatting on Facebook and had a great time for a few weeks. I knew she has a boyfriend, so I never flirted or did anything of that nature. Then, the awkwardness began. She started flirting with me and said she liked me and wanted to meet. I told her it wasn’t a good idea, but she persisted. Well after a few days, I got a message and it contained a nude pic of herself. I deleted the pic right away because it was wrong and I didn’t respond back. The same day, she asked if I liked the pic. I could have just not responded or just unfriended her, but I told her it was inappropriate and to stop sending those types of pics. Well, she finally admitted it was stupid and that she wanted to go back to talking as friends. The weird part about it is she became engaged two weeks after she sent me the pic.</p>
<p>So the question is: Should I keep my mouth shut or tell my friend (her friend as well) about this? I really feel bad for her fianc</p>
<p>FWIW, sometimes people who are nearly engaged or nearly married or the like have a last-minute burst of craziness before making that final commitment. This could be that kind of thing. Or she just might be a floozy. In either case, your best move is to just put this behind you and move on.</p>
<p>Whether you want to un-friend her is of course up to you.</p>
<p>I like your instincts. They will keep you out of all kinds of trouble.</p>
<p>Her fiance deserves to know and not have his life ruined by marrying a cheater. And cheaters deserve to be exposed for what they are.</p>
<p>If you have any way of getting the word out to him, do it. I (as well as most people I know) really hope that someone would do the same if it ever happened to me, and I would do it in a heartbeat for anyone else. It’s too serious an issue to turn a blind eye on.</p>
<p>ra-
You are a gentleman to keep the story about the bride to be to yourself, in light of her engagement soon after the event.
Sounds she wanted to see if she still could seduce a fellow, and she sexted you.
I don’t think your friend needs to tell the groom to be.
However, you should block the bride so you won’t be a target of drunk sexting.
You don’t want to be dragged into a situation that you are not invested in.</p>
<p>Also, just ask yourself, what would you want to happen if you and fiance switched places?</p>
<p>This could literally change the course of this guy’s entire life. This is not a momentary “burst of craziness”. People like that have some very serious issues, and they are not just going to stop this behavior/not having boundaries once they are married. He has a right to know and maybe not marry her or at least maybe insist they get counseling. It might be much easier to walk away, but again, what if it was you? Imagine being married for 5, 10, 20 years, and then you find out your wife has cheated on you, or she has been sending naked pictures of herself to other men (which IS cheating). How would you feel if you knew there was someone who new this before you ever got married and didn’t bother to let you know? It’s your business simply because you DO know.</p>
<p>I would think the wisest course would be to stop talking to her on FB. It seems like you don’t really know her well enough to know whether this behaviour was a momentary lapse, or part of her usual M.O. Block her, or unfriend her, do whatever you need to do.</p>
<p>Well if we’re playing the raise game, let’s go to the bible.</p>
<p>Romans 2:1</p>
<p>“You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.”</p>
<p>Edit:</p>
<p>Anyway, there is no such thing as a “good man”, everyone does things based on what they can be provided for, what they can provide for themselves, and what said people can do for others. It is a matter of doing for the purpose of fulfilling needs. A good man would do such things without a requirement or expectation, but such things don’t exist in any capacity.</p>
<p>I wasn’t coming at it from a Biblical or even a religious perspective - just the quote was very appropriate.</p>
<p>Quite honestly, to me it doesn’t matter if what the bible would supposedly say on the matter, or what societal ‘norms’ or ‘etiquette’ is. Plain and simple, the groom has every right to know he was cheated on, and the OP can let him go into the marriage with his eyes open and possibly prevent him from being devastated in the future and wasting years of his life. There is no excuse not to do this.</p>
<p>Oh, and I completely disagree with your last statement.</p>
<p>The bible is considered one of the most wise and intelligent books ever created, even by non religious people, so it made sense to use the verse.</p>
<p>It’s okay to disagree with it… but the reality is that it remains factual. That’s just the mechanics of how people work and it has been proven, reproven, confirmed, and validated since Day 1 of society. “What can you do for me?” Is the question, always, and the answer is unending.</p>
<p>You know, when you’ve got a girlfriend or boyfriend or a wife or husband, everytime you look at another woman that’s attractive and think ANYTHING be it voluntarily or subconsciously… you’re cheating. Should you be reported on for instance of that if you can remain loyal? People make mistakes. Now if it’s taken more direct and actual physical adultery or an affair is occurring…</p>
<p>acollegestudent, if OP does as you advise then he will most likely be embroiled in something that really is not his concern. He barely knows the girl or her fianc</p>
<p>Yes, HarvestMoon, it may not be good for him, but it’s the RIGHT thing to do. It’s just like if someone is harassing a woman or a child on the subway, you may get yourself into trouble by doing something about it, but it’s the RIGHT thing to do.</p>
<p>“You know, when you’ve got a girlfriend or boyfriend or a wife or husband, everytime you look at another woman that’s attractive and think ANYTHING be it voluntarily or subconsciously… you’re cheating.”</p>
<p>^^^ I actually agree with this, even though I am not from a religious perspective. And yes, I firmly believe it should be ‘reported’ by the person himself/herself.</p>
<p>But this is different. This IS cheating, and it’s not debatable (as in, just having an inappropriate thought), and people with a mentality like that are extremely likely to cheat in the future and take it further than just pictures. It is not fair for her fiance to have his life ruined. I bet if it were your son or daughter you wish someone told them something like this BEFORE they got married.</p>
<p>I know first hand (through helping someone through it) the devastation cheating causes in a marriage - it’s really like pretty much no other pain. And to me, to let someone walk into this is abhorent.</p>