<p>had a conversation with D about moving this summer.
I told her that mom and dad want to look for new job in east coast to be close to her. She said “no, no, please no. I need space to grow up. If you guys move over here I will quit and move away from nyc”. Iowa is home, you better stay…
Then I told her that if she doesn’t want us to be close to her. I will move to California after retirement since Iowa is too cold. Then she said: “mom, at that time I think you need to move near by me so that I can take care of you. You are too old at that time” …
Sometimes, she is so sweet. I am not planning to have her take care of me but just feel warm about this conversation.</p>
<p>As for parents faux pas
China college is different from here. All schools (high school and college) are kind of like elementary school here, each student belong to a class and have a home teacher, a teacher in charge of all activities of about 20 to 30 students.
H was in charge of a class long time ago and there is a freshman dad came to him and said:“My son is easy to oversleep in the morning, please come to his dorm and wake up him in the morning…” H looked at him, have nothing to say …
Some parents are way too much, till now I feel funny about that wonderful dad.</p>
<p>For me, I must did many many thing embarrass D in high school but I think I am fine now since never have any chance to interact with her college teachers …</p>
<p>Well I think D1 and Aspie girl are watching with a bit of dismay as Manga girl and I get ready to go on our road trip to Rochester. Manga girl made all the arrangements herself, including doing a bit of juggling of the schedule to fit Nazareth College in. She has planned for us to go to U of Rochester, SUNY Geneseo, Rochester Institute of Technology, and Nazareth College… whew! It’s going to be a busy couple of days. The hardest part will be getting to Syracuse before it gets too late and my night vision gives out. So I hope to be able to leave as soon as she gets off the bus. We’ll have a bit of a very early morning drive from Syracuse to Rochester, but I’d rather not risk the night time double vision thing and drive a leg of the trip in the morning.
After manga girl’s little adventure to the ER in Connecticut a few weeks ago, we will stay at a Residence Inn and take food with us. No dining out. Makes things a little more complicated, but spending more time at the ER because a restaurant doesn’t know what it’s doing is not my idea of fun or productive.
I feel sorry for D1 and Aspie girl. I did invite Aspie girl to come along – she’s the senior that’s graduating this year – but she doesn’t want to miss her equine buddies up at the barn. Don’t teenagers grow out of this horse-crazy business?
Hopefully we’ll learn a little more about art therapy.</p>
<p>Drae, you’re right about the Oogie program…UGH! What I find curious is that in their listing of top schools, places like Harvard are first and then the dedicated art schools are last on their list! Hmmm…makes me wonder if their target market is kids who really do want to pursue art, or kids with an interest in art that might use their interest as a hook to get into these universities and study something else. Also, what happens to these kids when they are expected to find their artistic voice and they no longer have a coach? Finally, I see that the program offers scholarships for their class fees, but only to those who already have “exceptional drawing skills” and high SATs. It makes me think they need those kids to show statistics on their website; seems Oogie “pays” those kids to attend in the form of scholarships, but they’d probably get in to the schools they choose anyway! Oh well, I am probably cynical about these programs; I never sent my kids to any kind of SAT prep, either!</p>
<p>Awwww, loveblue, that is so sweet of your D to think ahead to the time when she wants to be near enough to take care of you! Hopefully you won’t need that kind of help, but maybe you would like to be near one another if you have grandchildren someday.</p>
<p><<< loveblue wrote: For me, I must did many many thing embarrass D in high school but I think I am fine now since never have any chance to interact with her college teachers … >>></p>
<p>That made me laugh out loud! Loveblue, you are in good company then. I’m sure most of us here have managed to embarrass our kids!</p>
<p>Your stories of China are so interesting! I would love to hear more! My D started to learn Mandarin in high school and remains fascinated with the language and culture of China. She became close to her teacher, and she still studies her notes. During her first year of college she took a course called “Modern China”. I have her book here at home now and it is very compelling; mostly essays about perceptions of what China is and has been, and the basis of the culture. Her teacher also runs a Chinese film series which I believe is open to the public; I’d love to go but haven’t timed my visits right! D would like to continue studying Mandarin, but has to find a summer course since it’s not offered at her school.</p>
<p>Did you ever vist a store called Peony Red in Manhattan? It is run by a family and they were fascinated that Mandarin is being taught in high schools here! It is a beautiful shop; ooooh the clothes are lovely, and they have something for every age. Also jewelry and accessories, so pretty! It is right next to the Chinese Museum on the outskirts of Chinatown/Little Italy. D wanted a qui pao for my niece’s wedding and it was one of the only true dress shops we could find (not tourist trap). If your D ever wants to visit the area, I believe the museum offers free admission on Thursdays.</p>
<p>Hi Glutenmom, I hope you and Manga girl have a wonderful trip. Don’t feel badly about leaving the other girls. It will be nice for you to be able to give your time to just one kiddo! I loved those road trips with my girls, we’d talk or blast the radio and explore the towns to see if they were places they could see themselves for four years. My girls are like night and day, so it worked out that they could form their own opinions. You’ll be fine doing the drive from Syracuse to Rochester in the morning, especially with no snow in the picture yet! Hey, if you like pumpkins maybe you can buy some up there where they practically give them away!</p>
<p>Glutenmom, enjoy your trip. We loved both Syracuse and Rochester! That drive goes pretty quickly too, as did the ride from Syracuse to Pa. The only ride I found long was Pa to Rochester, but that was mostly because the freeways were very narrow with summer work going on. I agree with Colcon. Enjoy your time with Manga girl. There is so little time to be alone and focussed on our kids! As far as that Oogie program goes–meh. I had the same thought as Colcon. The way they worded how great they were and that they could get your kid into the “finest” schools, seemed to be geared to kids looking at art as a back-up activity. I think, at least from my d’s art friends, that the true art kids really look for a fit, both personally and academically-artwise. It does not seem that most of them feel the need to go to RISD, etc, but are looking to schools that fit them creatively. The Oogie website seems to promote selectivity to such a degree that I could see parents that want their children to go to HYPS salivating and handing over the money!</p>
<p>why the name Oogie, is it same oogie I knew of?
hummm
33rd street? across from empire state building? others in Queens and NJ?
leaks Asian invasion…
I have never heard of it till now but its track record goes back to 2004-sh? Art and Design HS? LaG HS? It might have been used to be something else that now under new management with snazzy web developing money.
How do they justify putting youngarts, bloomberg, scholastics, NFAA, cough cough White house logos under the page?</p>
<p>there are private portfolio tutors that costs arms and legs and people do use them.
Nothing wrong about the attitude if you can afford it and your goal is " gotta do this in two month" “getting in with art as a hook” or “get that award” or “that scholarship”
it is sort of pathetic thou, it counted every cooper money as “awarded scholarships”
but none in WashU or SFAI?
there must be same kids that counted repeatedly for “total” admitees and awards.</p>
<p>I can go spy once my mess is cleared.
it’s hard to conceive the idea that one floor in the midtown building could host proper studio to do anything, thou…</p>
<p>hi colcon
class starts next week. everything is laaaaaxxxxxxx I never knew that how much of advantage it is, no rush to beat traffic to buy anything, pay anything, worry none.
like, as my kid said, childhood, again.</p>
<p>This is the Oogie I know:[TV</a> ACRES: Puppets & Puppeteers > Oogie the Puppet and Floyd Vivino (Uncle Floyd Show)](<a href=“TV Acres - Best General News Website 2023”>TV Acres - Best General News Website 2023)
Uncle Floyd was on local NY cable in the early 80’s. Oogie was his puppet pal.</p>
<p>BTW for the newbies who may not have seen this now classic CC thread about move-in…even reading it the second time I laughed until I cried…some of the references to hick behavior may be lost on some of our yankee and foreign born friends but the Floridians are really going to get it…so for your enjoyment please read…
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/385663-moving-story.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/385663-moving-story.html</a></p>
<p>“Obviously in a hurry , she snags the passenger mirror on the front gate as it was opening and proceeds to pull it loose from the truck.”</p>
<p>Could someone explain this to a poor befuddled Vermont-living Yankee…didn’t she have to get out of the truck to open the gate? Oh wait, I get it, the passenger must have been opening the gate for her!</p>
<p>Half-way through and enjoying it. Thanks!</p>
<p>fammom, thanks for linking that great thread! I laughed out loud, then I cried and then laughed again.</p>
<p>If I had to pick somplace to live in Florida, it would be the Jacksonville area or west coast Sarasota area. Everything inland (IMHO) is redneck, Disney , redneck, or redneck. if you like still fighting the Civil War, than central Florida is for you.</p>
<p>GMom - enjoy your time with Manga girl and don’t feel guilty. We all know you have devoted many hours and much energy to Brave girl - Manga girl needs and deserves this too. I have a boss whose oldest D was never a problem, and the youngest was always challenged (drugs, bad relationships, school issues, etc). Boss said it seemed like his D1 always got the short end of the stick because all thier enrgy as parents was put into D2. Even today, altho D1 is in good relationship and expecting her first child, she continues to bail out (not literally, altho that could happen too) D2.</p>
<p>And I’m back…</p>
<p>Four colleges in two days – not bad. Manga girl waffles between wanting to be an art major (NO NO NO NO…) and a psychology major. She is a really fun travel companion. We had a great Mom-daughter bonding time. She just talks SO MUCH!! I need to give my ear a rest. The only conflict we had was that she thinks that I focus ‘too much’ on how much the college costs. I tried to remind her that she can want the sun and moon and stars, but realistically, there’s only so much that we can do. She just does not like to hear that yes, we can afford to send you to SUNY Geneseo – but U of Rochester is a different story – you only go if you get the scholarships to make up the difference. Somehow she interprets this as my lack of faith in her ability to get scholarships. She also has stars in her eyes about doing a study abroad program – in Japan, naturally. </p>
<p>So she liked U of Rochester much more than Nazareth College. Then we got to RIT. She fell in love. With the art house. They have special interest housing at RIT and when we went on the housing tour (we were rushing because we needed to get to SUNY Geneseo for the afternoon, so we were only spending the morning at the RIT open house) it ended at the ‘special interest housing fair’. Manga girl made a bee line to the ‘art house’. Oh my gosh!!! It was like the difference between day and night. I have never ever seen D1 connect with a group of students the way Manga girl connected with these art students. They had covered their table with a big sheet of butcher paper and had markers out… let the fun begin!! They watched Manga girl draw… and that was it… mutual love society. Five or six of the art house kids jumped up to take Manga girl to the art house to show here where they lived… so off we went… It was like these kids and Manga girl had known each other forever. They showed her their studio and she was in 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th heaven. The art house kids are not just art students, there is a psych student and a couple of engineering students – but this house seemed to connect with Manga girl and I could see that she could really see herself there being able to do ‘her’ art (and not the art mandated by some college professor) and studying psychology. The psych department is pretty small there, but she would probably do well. It was just fascinating to see that connection. I am tempted to haul D1 up there (too bad there’s no open house next week) as kind of an experiment because I know she (D1) would not have connected with the students the way Manga girl did.</p>
<p>She was so funny when we were driving home and I asked her how was she so sure that she would get to be one of the lucky ones to get to go to the art house if she went there… and she looked at me and said “Mom, they’re art kids. They watch disney movies”… given what I saw I have no doubt that she would get in. It was great to see her brimming over with enthusiasm. </p>
<p>SUNY Geneseo doesn’t stand a chance… sigh.</p>
<p>RIT!
finally someone is going to go there for real so we will know for real.
Gmom
I bet manga girl will score plenty merit aid.</p>
<p>fammom
you nailed it. I don’t see clearly what was happening esp, driving part.
but I did see all them posters who were awful mean to me at parents forum were there, quite touched by the OP’s stories.
they might have had similar history between them like we do in here, and OP being sweet dad might add some value.
If one wants to be understood, one has to be able to write right.
I decided I don’t want to be understood by these meanies, nor I don’t want to understand them.
Then, here they are totally civil, friendly, warm, interested, encouraging, curious people.
It is an eye opening. What’s up with them?</p>
<p>Hi everyone,
I’m so sad to see posters being mean to bears. Grrrr! I just think the internet is pretty unforgiving when communication is un-expected. For some native English speakers on CC, they just don’t seem to have a tiny bit of understanding that not all of us are coming from the same background, and that differences in English-writing should be accepted. Aren’t these some of the very parents trying to send their kids to colleges that celebrate diversity? ARG!!!</p>
<p>So sorry for the less-tolerent ones, b&d.</p>
<p>G=mom…thanks for the great college tour description. I was very impressed by RIT’s recruitment and organization level. RIT was pretty generous to S but mainly because of being hispanic plus the scholastic award…I get teh sense that girls (who are not in art) are valued at RIT so perhaps manga girl will feel the $love. I think perhaps you should take D2 on a short trip (if the horses can spare her)…perhaps someplace with a strong equestrian program…have you ever heard of stephens college in Columbia MO? Lovely little college. Quite a bit of emphasis on arts and performing arts but more laid back than a traditional college. It used to be for women only…strong equestrian program. I know it seems hard to imagine her going so far away but if she liked it and set it as a goal she could think about transferring there after junior college etc. </p>
<p>D is going to college information sessions at the school without any intervention on my part. She just said she went to Boston College last week (really? why?) and knows she doesn’t really want an urban campus where there is no clear delineation between college and city–bye-bye NYU, Pitt (sigh), VCU, etc…but she would consider an urban campus that has a clearly marked campus limit (us vs them?). </p>
<p>I am starting to look forward to some campus tours and think we may do some weekend ones for the close by places. One of her friends will lose her father to terminal cancer this fall and I told the Dad that I would bring his D along to our instate college visits. Much nicer for D to have a friend to do the tour while H and I and friend’s mom can hang out together. The dad really liked the idea because his wife is not american and would really like to have her D stay close by–as in stay at home for college. She is asian but she and my husband really are peas-in-a-pod culturally on this issue and totally agree that daughters should just stay home while they study in college, not date until after med-school and then only with long approval process of date by parents)>…Our D’s share a bond of having at least one parent who is really really conservative (when it comes to D’s) and makes embarrassing comments about the american way of life in a loud voice. Both girls have an american parent with far more liberal social approach and strongly believe that going away to study is good for a lot of kids.</p>
<p>It is a tragedy that the daughter will lose her easy-going father too soon. He is the sweetest guy and great dad. It is so hard for him not being able to help her with the college search process…take her on the tour or see her launched…and all the other milestones that he will miss in her life. I don’t know if I could face death with such strength, dignity and focus on doing the best for the family. He is an inspiration and makes me appreciate what we have–frustrations and all–and how lucky we are to see our kids as they make their way in the world…even with lots of hurdles we know they will eventually prevail and we will see them with careers and families of their own.</p>
<p>So sad story. Wish that dad can live longer to support his D better.
I can not see anyone losing parent. Still remember when I was a college teacher long time ago in China. There was a girl lost her mom because of cancer, I cried many times whenever I saw her, thinking no mom to attend her wedding; help her when she is going to have her baby …
All my imagination made me depressed for so long.
Yes, we are all blessed and we need to thanks God and treasure what we have. I am sorry for be religious here.</p>
<p>Gmom: glad you have a nice trip!</p>