<p>Whether or not she goes to Sweden it sounds like something needs to change. I have to wonder, was she happy her freshman year? Does she have good friends in her blocking group?</p>
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<p>I asked the same question several months ago. Since then I have gotten a new phone that places my punctuation oddly when I type messages on it, and that is my new theory. The problem on my phone is limited to the placement of quotation marks and other less frequently-used characters. Periods and commas are placed immediately after the last character of the previous word, as they are meant to be. </p>
<p>On the topic, it may be that this simply isn’t the right college for your daughter, Faux. There are plenty of people at Harvard who share her interests, because there are plenty of people there who share just about any interest. She could even find plenty of other sustainability-focused vegans and organizations that are devoted to causes of interest to her if she tried. If she isn’t doing that, it’s not because they aren’t there. They were there before sustainability was a word.</p>
<p>Last year a number of people agreed with you that it would be a pity for her to move off campus before experiencing life in the residential houses, but maybe at the end of this semester it might be time to re-evaluate whether this is the place for her. Many people love house life, but two of my four freshman roommates ended up not being crazy about it. One moved off-campus (and transferred to the administrative entity for off-campus students, Dudley house, which BTW also has some co-op living options), and one moved into what was, for all intents and purposes, a private home that was affiliated with our house. She was still on a full board contract and probably ate a number of her meals in the Adams house dining hall (not our house) but she rarely set foot in ours. I also knew several people who moved into the Jordan Co-Ops, an option that I’m not sure exists now.</p>
<p>This being said, if she would rather be somewhere that vegan sustainability is a more dominant ethos, she might seriously consider transferring. There are liberal arts colleges that might be a better fit for her. If she were my kid, I think I’d go visit her ASAP, sit down and talk, and explore whether taking spring semester off to think about what to do next would make some sense. Harvard lets people withdraw for a semester/year/whatever and come back again. Happens ALL THE TIME. But I would probably insist that the spring semester be spent at home, at least initially, working and figuring out what the next step would be. As noted above, there are many logistical issues to be addressed before the next step could realistically involve Sweden.</p>
<p>Just wanted to clarify something for the OP. I was the person who mentioned a “mistake”, and by that I did not mean to imply that your D did not “deserve” to be at Harvard (whatever you mean by “deserve”). I meant that it might not have been a good fit for her. If she is at Harvard, I am sure that they saw something truly special about her.</p>
<p>On the many college tours that I have been on (and I will say that I did not visit Harvard), many excellent colleges and universities featured plenty of vegan food. Many offered dance classes. Some were in agricultural areas where an interest in that kind of thing might be more accessible. I am kind of surprised that a place like Harvard does not offer vegan food or dance “on the menu”, but if these were important, why go there? It had to be obvious that Cambridge was not rural.</p>
<p>Are you hung up on prestige? The “deserve” thing may have been a poor choice of words, or not. Shouldn’t it be that kids go to a school to get the best possible education for them? (Not the “best” education possible - whatever subjective thing that means). I realize that I am being argumentative, and I don’t mean to alienate you. I sympathize with your upset, really and truly. Maybe your D would not be happy in another place, but maybe she would.</p>
<p>I have lived in a few different places over the years, and I will say that some fit great, and others, not so much. Sometimes it looks good on paper, but it just not that great in reality. Sometimes it is just the luck of the draw. When I went to grad school, by luck and a chance meeting, I got a really great roommate. That helped set off a good course for my studies there, and I have to say that this luck (and great roommate) made a difference in my success there.</p>
<p>Although I understand the concern, this young lady has not actually done anything radically destructive yet, and still seems to be listening, at least to her father. Which is an indication it probably isn’t some severe emotional or psychological illness or substance abuse problem. </p>
<p>In fact, this sounds like fairly innnocuous musing at this point (probably not uncommon in college), at least compared to things like this -[Helen</a> Newman’s Apocalypse](<a href=“http://mondoweiss.net/2006/05/helen_newmans_a.html]Helen”>Helen Newman’s Apocalypse – Mondoweiss)</p>
<p>Hi- I guess I always punctuated this way because I think it looks better ! I graduated HS in the class of 1971. There !</p>
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But your punctuation is just fine there.</p>
<p>Boys/Men:</p>
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<li><p>Didn’t the OP say his daughter was very young for her class? If she is, say, 17 or 18, dating a 16 year-old boy is hardly robbing the cradle. </p></li>
<li><p>Yes, on average, girls are more mature than boys at the same age, but an immature girl and a mature boy a few years younger could easily be on the same plane.</p></li>
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<p>The OPs daughter is a sophomore this year. Even at very young for her class I would say she was 17 as a first year, making her at least 18 now. Yes, some 16yos start college, however very, very few of them are mature enough to go away to school. Of those, fewer still are mature enough to be at ivy league schools. If they are, they would be likely to be very hyper focused on their studies due to the high intellect that got them there at a younger age in the first place.</p>
<p>Fwiw, post #1 says she’s 19.</p>
<p>Thanks for pointing out the obvious lookingforward! When all else fails, start at the beginning and READ! :D</p>
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<p>Sorry. Lookingforward is right, of course. But (at least in my experience) starting college after your 18th birthday would pretty much ensure that you were not one of the youngest in your class. My wife and my sister, for example, were both 18 in October of their sophomore years in college, and my wife would have been 17 if she hadn’t deferred enrollment for a year after she was admitted. I turned 18 a week before I started college, and it never even occurred to me that I might be young relative to my classmates. I’m sure I was below the median, but not by anything meaningful.</p>
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<p>JHS - I’m a late Dec birthday, was 17 when I started college and turned 18 when I went home over winter break, and like you, I never thought of myself as “younger” than the rest of my class in any meaningful sense. But times have changed – so many places that used to have Dec / Jan cutoffs now have Aug / Sep cutoffs, so indeed the vast majority of college freshmen these days have hit their 18th birthday before starting, and the ones who are just hitting it in late August / early September as you did are indeed the young ones.</p>
<p>Yes, these days, with a Fall bday, I would have been in the class after the one I was in.</p>
<p>Still, what is happening here? Has college changed? Freshman year changed? Are the kids behaving differently due to this holding back phenomenon? Are kids maturing later???
[Based on the small sample of this thread, yes, they are maturing more slowly in US than in Sweden…!]</p>
<p>FM - I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this issue. No advice, though. Just a hug.</p>
<p>Have her look into a semester or year abroad in Sweden. Many Swedish universities offer courses or whole degree programs in English, not to mention that they are very inexpensive if you arrange it directly and not via an exchange program.</p>
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That’s one of the more bizarre things I’ve read on CC.</p>
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<p>The kid is a student at what is almost certainly the top university in the world. On what logic is it a good idea to substitute cut-rate English-language courses in a Swedish university for the opportunities Harvard provides? If she wants to take a year’s leave from Harvard, and to spend it in Sweden, and if she can come up with a program that will expand her knowledge and horizons in Sweden (beyond whatever she learns in the sack with the boyfriend), that could be a reasonable course of action. But even if she plans to spend the rest of her life in Sweden, swapping English-language courses in Sweden for courses at Harvard is a losing trade.</p>
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<p>I find your punctuation style very distracting.</p>
<p>Harvard has programs in Sweden.
Harvard even extends fin aid to its study abroad programs.
Look at the leave of absence policy, the actual info and process.
Ensure any financial aid is protected if she is not enrolled.
And, if there are loans, understand dropping out can start the repayment cycle.</p>
<p>I can’t believe I am being attacked because I am punctuating incorrectly ! It is distracting to some - I was a Russian language major , and nobody fretted over the space in my punctuation ! For the record , my D has only had a platonic relationship with Swedish boyfriend . My boys find my punctuation odd as well !</p>