<p>I think the group that gets judged perhaps the most is any group with absolute values. In this culture, it is OK to say “This is what is right for me,” but it is considered almost taboo to say “This is right.” or “This is wrong.” We are supposed to accept almost all lifestyles, beliefs, etc. as equally good. Of course, it is true that those with absolute values may judge those without the same values as bad, but that is not always the case. I know a number of people who believe very strongly in certain absolute values, but still are loving and accepting of those who do not share their beliefs, perhaps because they possess the ability to see the world through others’ eyes.</p>
<p>“Before you critisize someone, try walking a mile in their shoes. Because then you are a mile away, and you have their shoes.” </p>
<p>~Jack Handey</p>
<p>LOL Kluge!!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>So funny!! Thank you!</p>
<p>I am judgemental about people who don’t hold tiny children’s hands in the cross walk. I cannot abide this, it drives me NUTS.</p>
<p>I am judgemental about bra straps that aren’t anywhere NEAR the contours of the shirt being worn. Especially when it is my D. HATE IT! Grrrrrr</p>
<p>I am concerned that my kids, who are both very live-and-let-live and non-judgemental, haven’t got enough practice with good, old-fashioned judgement. Sometimes it is healthy & proper to judge people and consider them dead wrong.</p>
<p>I admit to being “judgmental” when I see someone with a gazillion tattoos and/or tons of body piercings. The eyebrow ones and the tongue ones just really gross me out. Thank goodness, I don’t have to see “other” piercings that people have cuz they’re usually covered with clothing.</p>
<p>I, too, dont’ like to see little tiny kids crossing streets and/or walking in store parking lots without a much older sibling or parent holding their hands. (What are those parents thinking???)</p>
<p>SBmom, you beat me to copying Kluge’s quote about morons. LOL funny. </p>
<p>I think “judgmental” needs to be defined a little more precisely. Rather than listing “pet peeves” or things you don’t like, it seems to me that being judgmental as opposed to having good judgment is about making assumptions about a person based on a certain set of criteria such as the way they dress, color of skin, or grammar.</p>
<p>I am judgmental of anyone who drives a Hummer. I automatically assume they are greedy, careless hogs who probably voted for Bush because they thought he would lower their taxes. </p>
<p>So how is that for killing two birds with one stone. I’m not judgmental against people who voted for Bush, just those who still support him. </p>
<p>“flyover” land ? - the adjective is telling.</p>
<p>I won’t tell you what I think of the grammar, punctuation and spelling nazis.</p>
<p>lizschup</p>
<p>I think that there is a tendency for people to be “judgmental” about a person based on a set of criteria such as dress, skin color, grammar AND making assumptions based on some “pet peeves” . . </p>
<p>Yes, there are people who are judgmental about race, etc and most of us know how wrong that it. But many of us are judgmental about people based on the way they live, where they live, their politics, their religions, their body size, their affliliations, etc.</p>
<p>I’m admittedly judgemental about most things…a fault, I guess, but judging something sets the bar (for yourself) on what’s acceptable for you or not.</p>
<p>dke;</p>
<p>Yes, but people get “judgmental” about silly stuff. I have a friend who gets upset and judgmental when parents let their kids quit playing/practicing their instruments. She is gifted musically and therefore doesn’t understand why other parents don’t “value” having their kids master an instrument like she does. My friend will let her “judgmental feelings” about these parents carry over into her feelings about those parents in general – as if that one decision determines whether they are “good parent” or not — that is just silly.</p>
<p>Why is being judgmental considered such a bad thing? I consider myself discerning, which is the same thing. My friends are discerning people. The world calls for this skill as we try to be good partners, parents and workers.</p>
<p>SuNa</p>
<p>You are very right. We all need to be “judgmental” and use discernment about people. We don’t just let anybody be our kids’ playmates. We don’t let our kids go to just “anyone’s” home to play. We use our judgment and discernment when picking dates, spouses, friends, etc.</p>
<p>Yes, I think some parents can be very hard on other parents’ judgemental-wise. (that’s not a word, oh well)…Sometimes parents are threatened by other parents who do things differently. It can be threatening to their own values, I guess. We have to have confidence in our decisions and choices that we make for our families, and not always look to our right and left to affirm them. Sometimes that’s hard to do.</p>
<p>dke…</p>
<p>yes, sometimes there is a need for “validation” for one’s own choices which is why sometimes people get upset when others make different choices. This can also be found between an adult child and parents/parents-in-laws. Parents (& in laws) can get really upset when their adult kids make decisions that are the opposite of theirs. They think that others are making a statement that there is something wrong with the choices that they had made. (My sister-in-law didn’t like it when I decided to breast feed my babies. Even tho I never said anything to her about her choice, she couldn’t keep from making comments as often as she could.)</p>
<p>jlauer,</p>
<p>I think I didn’t explain myself clearly. I was just clarifying what I thought judgmental meant - trying to differentiate from pet peeves or dislikes or even discernment - I wasn’t passing judgment on anyone for talking about pet peeves . </p>
<p>“But many of us are judgmental about people based on the way they live, where they live, their politics, their religions, their body size, their affliliations, etc.”</p>
<p>I agree with your statement and don’t understand why you stated it this way - I wasn’t arguing with you but I get the idea from this quote that you think I am.</p>
<p>liz</p>
<p>I didn’t think that you were arguing with me.</p>
<p>It drives me nuts when when people with young children call you and think it’s OK to just start talking to their child , actually going over their homework, reading to them, and having an entire conversation for TEN minutes, without saying excuse me, or telling their child that it’s rude to interrupt an adult on the phone. </p>
<p>Then if you say, oh, I can tell this is a bad time, they will say, oh no, it’s fine . . . and keep doing the same thing throughout the whole conversation! Argh.</p>
<p>*It drives me nuts when when people with young children call you and think it’s OK to just start talking to their child , actually going over their homework, reading to them, and having an entire conversation for TEN minutes, without saying excuse me, or telling their child that it’s rude to interrupt an adult on the phone. *</p>
<p>Oh- my brother does this
Or he will let his daughter pick up another phone and talk ( long distance calls of course)0</p>
<p>I"m judgemental of people who step out on their spouses. I was “hit on” a fair amount when i worked in NYC on Wall Street. Because I was single the married big wheels at my firm thought it meant that I was available. They disgusted me. All I could think of was their wives out their in the 'burbs, trying to raise their kids while their husbands were hitting on young women like me. Now I’m the married Mom, and see husbands stepping out on their wives. I know these wives, and they’re decent women who don’t deserve it. Nobody deserves it. Why do they think they can have their cake and eat it too? They have no intention of divorcing their wives. They like things just the way they are. Devoted family men? Yea, right. I guess I sound bitter, I guess, but it really does bother me when I see it happenning and I think to myself when I see these wives, “if you only knew”.</p>
<p>dke</p>
<p>Me, too. When I meet someone who I know has cheated on their spouse (or past spouse), I can hardly even be civil to them. </p>
<p>I remember when I was “young and firm” and working in a mostly male environment and there were a few skirt-chasers that had wives at home that had no idea that their H’s were such flirts (Married men who flirt are really in the “pre-hitting on mode” – they are looking for a sign, a favorable response from the girl, so they will know if they should go further and ask them out “for lunch” or “drinks” or whatever.</p>
<p>The truth is that everyone is judgmental. The real negative connotation is with people who are <em>constantly</em> critical. If someone is always looking to complain or seeing the negative side of things, then that person is not going to win many friends or influence people even if they make valid points. </p>
<p>But haven’t we all known people that can even come across as somewhat charming in their dissatisfaction with the world and themselves? At one time Woody Allen and Jerry Seinfeld made careers of it! Those who can get away with being judgmental, know how to put a light touch on things. Bill Clinton (whether or not you liked him) was an expert at this. People who just perseverate and have no social skills won’t fare as well.</p>
<p>speaking of judgmental
<a href=“http://www.komotv.com/stories/43727.htm[/url]”>http://www.komotv.com/stories/43727.htm</a>
anyone drives when they are not physically able to- not to mention anyone who doesn’t do everything they can- at least what is legally required- to protect a child
why do people not use car seats?
I have seen people holding babies on their laps in very high end cars- sometimes with an empty car seat in the back
I had two high needs kids- I know about putting in car seats- but damn! idiots</p>