<p>chocoholic, you seriously need a course in reading comprehension. And understanding the dynamics of how a fight typically breaks out has nothing to do with racial experiences.</p>
<p>Haha, I see you resorting to your usual tactics. See, I never said anything personal TO you, just about words you used. But W/e. I don’t call other posters names, nor deride them.
Funny that you know so much about racial experiences.
Whatever floats your yacht.</p>
<p>I give up. People are apparently incapable of basic logic in attempting to distinguish the factual differences between two separate incidents involving minority students, and why a school adminstration might handle them differently. I offer observations, based both on the facts stated by the OP and my own experiences, about why the school might be handling the two scenarios differently - and am repeatedly met with the refrain that “I just can’t understand” b/c I’m not a minority.</p>
<p>Moreover, chocoholic then insists on putting words in my mouth. Nowhere did I call the OP a “chump” - I just said that one doesn’t get in someone else’s face without intent to back it up… which the OP did (eventually pushing the other girl)… unless you are a “chump.” Hence, the OP was NOT a chump. Again, read what I wrote more closely before pointing fingers. </p>
<p>I’m done with posting on this board for good, as it is quite apparent to me that anything viewed as potentially against the “party line” or being less than 100% supportive of a poster, including the OP, is not welcome. If you want to counsel a poster to make a big stink about allegedly disparate treatment while not examining the facts closely, have at it. </p>
<p>Have a nice life, y’all.</p>
<p>Art, don’t let a disagreement with a poster run you off. Your points are valid. When I read the OP, and then the subsequent saber rattling posts, I thought as you did that it may not be in the OPs best interest to make a bigger issue out of this. She may not have a case. She may end up looking even worse. Of course, whenever someone presents their side of the story, it’s just that- their side. Sometimes people are not helping by throwing fuel on the fire and stirring the pot. It kind of reminds me of the Jerry Springer audience around here…“Yeah!! Fight!! Fight!! DO it!! Goforit!! Fight!!”</p>
<p>Yo, A.V. Don’t leave. I found your posts perfectly clear and right on target.</p>
<p>I agree that the OP may not present the case clearly, it’s hard to know who from one person point of view. It’s hard to tell in the internet. I know similar things happen to my kid and I call the principle and he called both kids in right away. After confirm the story from both kids, he issued very stern warning to the kid who called my D names. The school is to make sure these sort of intimidating experience is not tolerated.</p>
<p>AV - For someone who purports to use logic and analysis - you seem to be a bit deficient in these areas regarding this incident.</p>
<p>“While I have no tolerance for racism, in re-reading the OP’s story, I honestly don’t think she is nearly as innocent in all this as some of us are making her out to be. Getting in someone’s face b/c they walked between you & the mirror during your between-classes beauty session? Let’s be real here about who was the aggressor in this confrontation. This fight was “on” before the Asian comment even took place.”</p>
<p>As I had stated previously, OP was wrong to initiate the physical contact, but it’s not like the girl who had made previous nasty/racist comments didn’t play her part and escalate the situation as well.</p>
<p>Btw, your “between-classes beauty session” comment is a bit sexist. What’s wrong with a person checking themselves in the mirror (heck, I do it from time to time)?</p>
<p>“Ok, but that was IN THE PAST and there was time to “cool down” after that incident, so you can’t use that as an excuse for the OP confronting this girl in the heat of the moment. The OP seemed to be intent on starting some static with this girl at some point down the line after that, almost premeditated, and this minor mirror-crossing incident provided the opportunity.”</p>
<p>OP confronted the girl for cutting in front of her at the mirror. </p>
<p>Maybe OP wasn’t as polite as she could be in addressing the girl for cutting (but then again, the other girl wasn’t either for cutting in front of the mirror in the 1st place), but it was the “rude” girl and not OP who took it from an issue about rudeness to a racial one by retorting the way she did (if you think someone is being unreasonable or even being an a-hole, why not simply state that instead of having to drag someone’s race into it?).</p>
<p>“Unless you are a chump, one doesn’t get up in someone’s face without being ready to back it up. The OP knew full well what was going to happen when she confronted the surfer chick about the mirror. She had stewing about that prior racial slur for 6 mos, and was ready to throw down. This is why I called her acts “premeditated.” The original racial slur, while it was the root cause of the fight incident, was not truly the direct, proximate cause. There is a big difference, I would say. And I don’t think “silly little Asian girl,” (or whatever) while certainly said with some contempt toward Asians in general, is not nearly as offensive as the “jungle bunny” comment. And at that point, I the fight was probably already going to happen regardless of what this racist girl said.”</p>
<p>It could have easily been ANOTHER girl who rudely made her way to the mirror. Likely, the OP would have made a similar comment to that girl and just as likely, that girl would probably have retorted in some kind of manner - however, we DON’T know what kind of response OP would have made from that point if the other girl made a race-neutral retort as opposed to one regarding her race.</p>
<p>Interesting thread guys.
Another point is, one MUST control one’s temper. It doesn’t matter what anyone says to us, we musty suck it up and control ourselves.Punch a pillow, put on running shoes or just , ahemm, consider the source and forget about it.
So many morons in the world. Why waste your time?</p>
<p>Violence is never the answer, especially in light of the VT masacre, but neither is cowering to your tormentor. What I advocate is to stand up strongly for one’s self, with the smartness to walk away, not shyly but having the last say that this situation is not worth the heartache it brings, something to that effect.</p>
<p>By the way, I am gainning more insights about AV, why he/she not more sympathetic to OP. You might want to check out post #36 again.</p>
<p>Bullies/racists are the same everywhere - they prey on those they consider to be weak and defenseless.</p>
<p>Unless you stick up for yourself (doesn’t mean it has to be physical), they will continue and even escalate the harassment.</p>
<p>One thing to note - while informing teachers/the school administration (if they are supportive) about the harassment is often the “text-book” answer - many times, this backfires and the victims of bullying are even more targetted/ostracized as a “rat”, etc. (often leading to the kid having to transfer to another school).</p>
<p>My idea is this- get the bully to shove you first, then do your best basketball-player style pratfall, followed by a delayed recovery, culminating in a trip to the clinic with complaints of severe headache, wrist pain, possible back/neck soreness. That’s the way to get everyone on your side.</p>
<p>Never, ever throw the first punch, or shove.</p>
<p>double, wouldnt that just make you look pathetic in the eyes of your enemy? Maybe they were right about you ?</p>