@swimcatsmom, I think that linen tunic in purple could be beautiful with maybe silver linen pants. However, on the same page as your link I saw this:
https://www.softsurroundings.com/p/paisley-park-tunic/
The fabric is a little dressier, it’s definitely got a “beachy” feel, and if it’s too sheer, wear a shell underneath. Paired with some slimmer cut linen pants in cream with some great jewelry and I think it would be very nice for a beach wedding.
I think “beach wedding formal” is an oxymoron!
@runnersmom - that is pretty. I think my husband may be sorry I found that site if the tops are as pretty in person as they are in the pictures.
@MaineLonghorn lol, I agree. I was excited when I heard it was a beach wedding then a bit flummoxed by the beach formal.
Not an oxymoron. 
This is to let folks know that they are expected to wear clothes, not swimsuits or coverups.
I think if the brides are both wearing pants they will be ok with the female guests wearing pants. If I were to go with a dress or skirt it would be a long one but as i would likely not wear them again I am leaning toward pants. I like the tunic idea.
I suddenly remembered I have a coral colored lace top I have never worn. Ii is very pretty but the outer part is completely see through and the lining just doesn’t cover what needs to be covered (I really don’t want to be flashing my bra at anyone and I’m sure they’d prefer that also)
If I can find something that looks good under it that may be an option.
Though I do like the tunic ideas.
Do you think that is all they mean @BunsenBurner ? Am I over thinking it?
https://www.theknot.com/content/what-to-wear-to-a-beach-wedding
I think flowy pants with a cute top will look as nice as some of the dresses in that link. If the brides are wearing pants, guests certainly can!
Macy’s has a sale today, (there’s always a sale, LOL). www.macys.com/shop/product/charter-club-linen-striped-bell-sleeve-top-created-for-macys?ID=5398910&CategoryID=255&swatchColor=Misty%20Mint%2
Linen top that would pair well with your black linen pants. Dress it up with jewelry.
Can you do a jumpsuit? https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/adia-jumpsuit?category=new-jumpsuits-rompers&color=066 with a little cardigan https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/sharona-crocheted-cardigan?category=new-sweaters&color=066. Paired with dressy jewelry it would not be too casual.
With younger people I sometimes think the definition of formal is not as formal as we think. It could be they are sending the message to their friends to not wear shorts. I think a tunic with linen pants would be nice. I love the top that @runnersmom linked with a tank or t shirt underneath.
I like the one that runnersmom linked in post #20 also, very fresh and pretty.
What about something like these?
https://www.dillards.com/p/calvin-klein-spring-rose-gingham-floral-print-chiffon-tunic/507894269?di=05324394_zi_latte_spring_rose_multi&categoryId=603986&facetCache=pageSize%3D96%26beginIndex%3D0%26orderBy%3D1
I’m in the camp of being confused about beach formal. To me, beach formal means to me Lilly Pulitzer’s and attire like that. Bright and fun but more formal. But to this crowd, it might mean no shorts or beach coverups.
I had a family event a while ago. No invitations but my mom kept telling me that the dress was very casual. People were wearing polo shirts. Then I found out that the attire was country club. I dusted off my Lilly and so did most of the people my age and younger. My mom had no idea what country club attire was but she ended up wearing a nice Chico’s blouse (that I had given her and was a bright color) and a pair of pants. She was very appropriate.
I have to say, that I might (ok I did) have lost it with my mom. But she really had no idea what the dress code meant. I personally feel that I spend half my life trying to figure out what different things mean.
@deb922…I hear you. We were invited to a wine country wedding “garden party formal, black tie optional”. I ended up wearing a dressy short dress, H wore suit and tie. We were fine. Many long dresses. Felt sorry for one couple: the wife had relied on her H’s conversation with the FOB, who said “it’s not that fancy, be comfortable and casual” (the FOB had tux on). He showed up in polo shirt and khaki’s and she wore capris and summer top. 
The request for “formal” would indicate to me either neutral linen or palazzo pants with a gorgeous silk or embellished tunic, or maxi dress (since you want to cover arms and legs). You might find that either of these outfits can be worn again over the summers
I’m with @coralbrook. I think the links to pants on the first page are way too casual for a wedding that includes the description of formal.
Dressy linen slacks seem a little hard to come by…would you consider silk or silk crepe in a light color? If you go for a tunic-style top I’d look for a narrower profile than a palazzo.
@swimcatsmom, it sounds like it’s your H’s family. Maybe you can contact the MOB and see what their idea of beach formal is. And it sounds like the brides are wearing pants so I’m guessing they aren’t girly girls. If your H is anything like mine, I would not trust him to call about a dress code.
I linked the pants on the first page to ask what is beach formal? They were all palazzo pants I thought of various price points.
But ugh! It’s already costing $1000 for the hotel and then spending $$$$ on an outfit that doesn’t fit into your daily life, it’s hard for some of us to justify.
Quit focusing on “BEACH” and look at where the RECEPTION is being held.
Is the reception on the beach for a picnic or outside buffet or at a fancy country club or hotel?
It’s more common to have a “beach” wedding and then move inside immediately afterward.
That’ll tell you if capris are okay or go for fancier resort wear.
You might not like dresses but I’d go for tea length, brighter colored outfit.
If you want to wear black pants etc–dress it up with some great fun jewelry.
(I’m staying out of the linen debate–all it does is wrinkle and hang limp in my opinion–but that’s just me).
Watch your shoes–if it’s possible you’ll be in sand then think twice about heels. Or have a plan to change if it matters much to you.
Look at the Knot for definitions of what “formal” is–pretty much just dressed up but not necessary to wear a gown (that get’s into “black tie” territory.
The girls are in their early 50s (well his neice is - 51 I think). I may ask her mom but she is more of a sequins and shiny and lace when she dresses up which is not at all my style - well I like some lace so not sure I’d neccessarily be in sync with her advice.
The linen pants I have are pretty nice I think. I have some wide leg and some peg leg. I think they may work if I can get a really nice top.
We don’t have any clothes stores other than Walmart, Maurice’s and Cato’s where I live so it will be the internet.
Quit focusing on “BEACH” and look at where the RECEPTION is being held.
Google your hotel and reception venue.
Is the reception on the beach for a picnic/outside buffet or at a fancy country club or hotel?
It’s more common to have a “beach” wedding and then move inside immediately afterward.
That’ll tell you if capris are okay or go for fancier resort wear. Lean towards fancy–it’s a wedding.
If you know what the bridesmaids are wearing, that’s a huge clue.
If you’re at an expensive hotel (and it sounds like you are) I’d bet the venue is beach-front but on hotel grounds with great views of the beach but not literally ON (standing in sand) the beach. Those can be pretty fancy. The reception will be outside and then move in for dinner–but dress-up.
Is it a large wedding? Wear fancy duds.
You might not like dresses but I’d go for tea length, brighter colored outfit with my fanciest but still comfy shoes and good jewelry. Smallest purse possible.
If you want to wear black pants etc–that’s okay too–dress it up with a more sparkly top and some great fun jewelry. Your “funnest” shoes.
(I’m staying out of the linen debate–all it does is wrinkle and hang limp in my opinion–but that’s just me).
Watch your shoes–if it’s at all possible you’ll be in sand (or on uneven ground or standing WAY too long) then think twice about heels that aren’t super comfortable. Or have a plan to change,
Look at the Knot for definitions of what “formal” is–pretty much just dressed up but not necessary to wear a gown (that get’s into “black tie” territory.