<p><<if being=“” a=“” mom=“” was=“” job,=“” we=“” would=“” have=“” all=“” unionized=“” long=“” time=“” ago.=“” negotiated=“” things=“” like=“” kisses=“” for=“” hard=“” work,=“” hugs=“” clean=“” laundry,=“” and=“” half=“” (paid=“” in=“” chocolate)=“” help=“” with=“” college=“” essays.=“”>></if></p>
<p>LOL! And annual bonuses in the form of shiny baubles that come in small velveteen boxes!</p>
<p>Thought provoking article:</p>
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<p>[“Why</a> Have Kids?” Motherhood and Politics in the U.S. - The Juggle - WSJ](<a href=“http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2012/09/27/being-a-mom-is-not-a-job/]"Why”>http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2012/09/27/being-a-mom-is-not-a-job/)</p>
<p>Lots of things aren’t jobs but are still valuable and important. I would put motherhood in the category of a calling or a passion.</p>
<p>Unless my kids are on my nerves.</p>
<p>Well, motherhood may not be a job, but it’s a very time-consuming committment. It can be as time consuming as running a business or whatever. </p>
<p>Some of us are or have been care-givers for our elderly parents. That also isn’t a job. Similarly, it’s a relationship… but it also can be very time-consuming.</p>
<p>What difference does it make whether we consider it a “job” or a “relationship”?</p>
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<p>If it’s not a job, we can farm out some of the jobs connected to it without guilt.</p>
<p>Lots of people do farm out some of the jobs connected to it without guilt. Nanny, anyone? Babysitter? Cook? Carpools/chauffeur?</p>
<p><<well, motherhood="" may="" not="" be="" a="" job,="" but="" it’s="" very="" time-consuming="" committment.="">></well,></p>
<p>And an incredible responsibility - one that involves much more responsibility than most “jobs.”</p>
<p>No, kids aren’t a work product but they are an emotional product. Go see the “MIL thread” for some bad examples…But I for one have only ever felt to be the caretaker of my kids like a gardener loves his favorite roses. You take the best care you possibly can, try to nurture their growth, admire their beauty, And maybe stake them if they grow the wrong direction (that line can be taken two ways, LOL!). But they have to be able to thrive on their own.</p>
<p><<and maybe="" stake="" them="" if="" they="" grow="" the="" wrong="" direction="" (that="" line="" can="" be="" taken="" two="" ways,="" lol!).="">></and></p>
<p>I got it immediately! Dealing with some issues with DS#2 and I needed a laugh! Thanks!</p>
<p>“If it’s not a job, we can farm out some of the jobs connected to it without guilt.” </p>
<p>Don’t really get the point here. Referring to motherhood not as a “job”, but as a “relationship” allows one to farm out jobs connected to it without guilt? Not in favor of guilt in either case, but I would imagine the opposite.</p>
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<p>That was just my personal theory of why the author was attracted to the idea. However, here is her actual point:</p>
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<p>“Why can’t we organize for this when we organize for everything else?”
Duh, because we’re talking about kids, maybe? When was the time ANY facet of life really got organized?
Why is this being analyzed to begin with? Motherhood takes a big time commitment if you do it right (or for helicopter moms maybe a bit less would be better!). But you aren’t going to get paid to do it–it’s part of life and hopefully a choice. And by those who aren’t ready, it’s a problem and an unwanted job and for those who would gladly volunteer to be mothers, its a privilege.</p>
<p>Being a mother is a guardianship, with all of the responsibility and obligation that implies.
Far more than a job, imo.</p>
<p>Of course motherhood is not a job. A job is something you get paid to do. No one could ever pay me enough to wake in the middle of night, in a cold sweat, my heart pounding, because I dreamt my kid jumped off a bridge. No one could ever pay me enough to bake cupcakes, frost them, add sprinkles, wrap them up and priority mail them to my 20 year old kid, just to hear him say “You sent me sprinkles.” </p>
<p>I find the idea that motherhood is a job demeaning to my role as a mother – it is not a job, it is not relationship — it is who I am.</p>
<p>By any economic standard, mothering is a job. Division of labor has been recognized as a basic of economics since ancient times. </p>
<p>The issue is more “mothering is not considered to be in the workforce”. Totally separate idea based in categorizing work done outside the home. </p>
<p>There has been research into how time was spent in the past. One study looks at household allocation of hours from the mid-1800’s USA into the 1960’s. By decade. You see there very clearly the division of labor: massive amounts of time spent on cooking and laundry. You see the allocations change as labor-saving devices entered the home, just as when they came into the non-home workplace. These reflect the natural movement away from necessity and subsistence chores to work of choice. Ovens that could run without constant tending. Laundry wringers and eventually laundry machines. Vacuum cleaners. Ice boxes and then refrigerators. </p>
<p>At an extreme, if one imagines a house in which food is prepared outside the home and delivered, which has a cleaning service come in, where the kids have transport to school, etc., then we could say “mothering” is part of the time freed up by the removal of those chores. That part, things like reading books together, was restricted in the past by the need to do household labor to survive. </p>
<p>One can argue we don’t need much of that “mothering” because so much of our history has involved a different form of childhood in which the parents - and sometimes the children - had so much to do each day to make it through the day and the year. I have no idea what that gets you.</p>
<p>I like zm’s concepts of “a calling” and “a passion” - and I would add “an identity.” “Job” doesn’t really capture the all-consuming commitment, which is lifelong, with no possibility of reversing the decision to become a parent. I don’t think “relationship” is strong enough. I have a relationship with the guys in Dunkin Donuts who give me my iced tea.</p>
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This is the God’s honest truth. Which is why empty nest syndrome is so universal. My baby is about to turn 14 and has started high school. I am having a very hard time with it. Yes, it’s a first world problem, but looking his maturity in the eye, I am struggling desperately to figure out who I am apart from the kids’ mom and what earthly reason could there be for my existence when they’ve all made lives for themselves.</p>
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<p>I believe the author is using “organized” in the meaning of people banding togther to push for a common cause, in this context, for mom/child/family-friendly laws and policies.</p>
<p>Having read 100s of posts by missypie and zoosermom, no one can doubt their passion and heeding of the call!</p>
<p>I suggest that the solice of the child growing up is that a child raised by a parent who does not WANT their child to NEED them, but rather NEEDS their child to WANT them in their lives forever usually has this need met.</p>
<p>NYMom–that’s one of the problems of motherhood–your kids become your “identity”. Their failures become your failures and you tend to take their successes as yours–and while you aid them on their journey through life, all of those ups and downs really should belong to your kids, not you.</p>