Boasting parents? Affecting friendships?

<p>I only told that story to my father just recently, just before he died. My father said, "Why didn’t you tell me when that happened? I’d have gone in and punched out that principal!’ </p>

<p>“That,” I said, “was the reason I DIDN’T tell you.”</p>

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<p>The principal was horrible…but many of us could share stories that are also horrible (probably not THAT bad). Our generation of parents gets bad press for being “helicopters”, over involved, etc. but sometimes I think it’s due to our own school experiences…principals and teacher should not be able to get by with some of the things they got by with in the past when the parents were much less involved.</p>

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<p>Missypie - Yep, this sounds exactly like my own school experiences.</p>

<p>missypie… Instead of my father being a helicopter parent, he would have been a “guided missile parent.” lol</p>

<p>I guess I can’t condone actual physical violence, but if anyone deserves it, your principal did!</p>

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<p>LOL. Agree that there are some really bad principals and schools out there! </p>

<p>My dad was kind of like yours, digmedia. I guess that’s why I would never be one to approach a principal about anything, even if it meant biting my tongue. But I do admire parents who can confront a principal about an injustice in a calm and rational way. Maybe I’ll learn to do that someday!</p>

<p>In my CC dealings, a typical PM to me would be “Can you help me with my perfect SAT son who is at Princeton now and needs to expunge a slight criminal matter on his record?”</p>

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<p>That is so hilarious, yet so sad, yet so hilarious. I am still laughing over here at the “perfect dog-walker!”</p>

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<p>Gee- I was under the impression that the person who ya’ll say is gone is not really gone! Reincarnation and all that. As flurpy said, none of us is as anonymous as we want to think.</p>

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<p>missypie, I think I agree!</p>

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Perhaps Princeton should be a bit more selective! ;)</p>

<p>purpleflurp- I bet you can really relate to that story about the ex-poster and the principal, can’t you? I mean- REALLY relate!</p>

<p>The conversation is losing me, but… back to the topic. I’m curious about what y’all think of the question. We all agree that we have a very low tolerance for bragging IRL, and it appears that we have a low tolerance for the sort of “I’m not bragging, but I really am…” behavior (“My poor daughter blew the SAT She only got a 2340.”), but outright bragging - and being upfront about it - seems to be OK here…?</p>

<p>Just exactly where <em>is</em> the line?</p>

<p>((I’ve reserved my worst bragging for PMs to those people who have at least ACTED interested in what my son was doing. Thanks to those guys for not complaining to me, even if I deserved it :slight_smile: ))</p>

<p>Dig,
you are a bright guy- what are your thoughts?</p>

<p>Funny story: S, 21, and I went to a local restaurant to hear a recent college grad who sings at a local restaurant. At the table, we joined her mother, who had never met S before.</p>

<p>The proud mom talked on and on about how wonderful her daughter was including how her daughter had majored in musical theater, which, proud mother said, “is so much more difficult than is just majoring in theater.”</p>

<p>Not once did she ask S anything about himself, and S and I didn’t volunteer any info </p>

<p>S is a theater major. :)</p>

<p>S and I laughed about this afterward. </p>

<p>I have far more tolerance for parents who brag about their kids than for parents who brag about themselves. I had invited an acquaintance who is a social work professor to come to lunch at my house to talk to S, who at that time was interested in possibly eventually becoming a social worker. </p>

<p>The woman spent the entire lunch talking nonstop about herself. My eyes glazed over, and S ended up excusing himself from the table. She never noticed his departure…</p>

<p>I have to confess that I’ve been known to brag about my 25 year old S because he was the opposite of the typical CC kid, but has managed to become a very successful adult. And by success, I mean he is living exactly the life he wants, making a living doing something he loves, and on his own terms. It kind of makes up for all those years listening to the other parents brag about their Ivy-bound offspring and me providing the audience. To be fair, none of my friends ever rubbed it in, and I never took it badly. I just felt a little sad for my boy. Now, I am so grateful that my S is happy, I feel the need to share it. Maybe a little too much? I guess I should really be grateful for my patient friends!</p>

<p>Whenever there’s an aspect of human behavior I can’t figure out (which would be almost all of them), I wonder how it might be hard-wired into us. On this issue, it occurred to me that personality types (those dreaded Myers-Briggs profiles) could be responsible for the big divide here. Extroverts celebrate their children’s abilities, but introverts experience that as bragging. Maybe?</p>

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Exactly. There is a lot more transparency about things now than in the past (even if some school systems fight/ignore/stall the FOIA requests). Schools used to be given free rein to do lots of things. NCLB changed some of that. Savvy parents and the Internet with increased information flow have also contributed to the veil of secrecy being lifted somewhat.</p>

<p>I’ve read the brags on here without any feelings of animosity one way or the other. I sort of like it that we have a place where we can brag. HOWEVER, when I really enjoy hearing it is when the parent doing the bragging is doing it with a sense of excitement and celebration about the achievement.</p>

<p>But, the bragging is a lot more tolerable if the person is genuinely interested in YOUR kid as well (which of course may be in other posts).</p>

<p>Steeling myself for the bragging Xmas letter with “top scores, grades and EC’s” !! YAHOO! My fave so far this year is the one from a current IVY Mom saying that its so much easier now to get in than when HER daughter got in two years ago because of demographics. Will it ever end? haha</p>