<p>I thought this was an interesting essay. I want my children to go to college, but I also want them to be productive before they are 22, both for my sake and theirs.</p>
<p>The couple who own that Subway shop [where their 12-year-old daughter served the author on a Saturday] should get a parenting award, because they have dared to do something that many modern parents refuse to do: expose their kids early to the exigencies and realities of life. They heaped adult responsibility on their twelve-year-old daughter, and she ate it up. They gave her duties and responsibilities, and she owned them. They permitted her to be a part of the family business, and she was grateful.</p>
<p>Many parents I know do the opposite. Instead of making their kids work for what they want, they simply give them stuff. Instead of making them work for an Android or an iPad or a car, parents simply give their kids these goodies, and ask for nothing in return. Not a thing.</p>
<p>Kids having a job in high school is all well and good, yes. I had a job all throughout high school and in college, and I think it taught me character and time management skills. Twelve seems a bit young; even for a family-owned business, I’m not sure if that’s legal. But that’s a side point; replacing the number with fourteen wouldn’t change the story all that much.</p>
<p>But the author paints a lovely rosy story that isn’t at all close to how things would actually work in reality. Sure, some kids would be able to work without it negatively affecting their school work, but because of family situations, others would be pressured to work for more hours than they reasonably can without hurting their grades to help support their family. Isn’t the same goal accomplished just as well if parents enforced doing household chores and didn’t buy their kids every new gadget or car?</p>
<p>I don’t like the idea of middle school kids having adult responsibilities. Middle school kids can participate in the running of the household. Our kids were able to clean up the kitchen, take out the garbage and help in the yard. They were able to earn extra money if extra projects popped up around the house.</p>
<p>My husband is a partner in a small law firm. He and his partner give the kids summer jobs as law clerks when they start high school. They are given real responsibilities and do the real, tedious work at a law firm (shredding, filing, answering phones, organizing the file room, etc.). They are expected to get up early, show up on time, clock in, clock out, bring their own lunch and do whatever other workers in the firm do. I do not see a benefit to making kids work when they are still children. </p>
<p>I think that their self esteem is boosted by working and having their own money.</p>
<p>My husband and I both started working at “real jobs” when we were 13. We applied for social security numbers and so it began right up until the time I left for college or in my H’s case right on through college. We both still had time for our music, our sport, homework and all the other things. Kids can “work” at any age and yes I think kids that don’t have an opportunity to work a real job are disadvantaged. And yes self esteem is only one of many advantages. 13 is young and times have changed. I think 15 is a good age. In our area typically they aren’t allowed to work more than 10-15 hours a week at age 15 so it’s not a huge time “sucker.” Two of my three found jobs the summer after sophomore year, one didn’t find one that summer but found one shortly after he turned 16. I think we put too much emphasis on the numbers in high school, growth and maturity are measured in many different ways.</p>
<p>Getting one’s kids to do chores is a good idea and paper routes and local lawn mowing services can be quite beneficial to a child’s development. But “child labor” connotes something quite different. It refers to the practice of children working for strangers for compensation. We have seen throughout history, throughout the world, this virtually always leads to abuse, often extreme abuse. That is because children are not in a position to push back when others try to take advantage of them, and almost everyone is tempted at times to try to take advantage of others, particularly strangers. That is why great power differences usually lead to great injustices.</p>
<p>"Many parents I know do the opposite. Instead of making their kids work for what they want, they simply give them stuff. "</p>
<p>-But if they work very hard at academics, they will save their parents much much more $$ than whatever min. wage work can bring. There is simply no comparison. Full tuition Merit award? It might be worth $200k. I know someone who just got full ride (Merit) at JHU, he did not waste his precious time being a waiter. If he did not get that one, he also had many coaches around country after him for D1 athletic opportunities. The guy is also playing in musical band. Very happy that little girl is so satisfied with her adult responsibilities. But some kids are soo busy and working soo hard to insure that their parents are not streached to the limits paying their college tuition, that we as parents simply need to recognize this effort and reward them with “things” that they need instead of bashing them for being lazy because they are not working at fast food place. They are not lazy…and most work while in HS anyway, at least in a summer if job is there as not every parent owns his place of business.</p>
But it’s not just about the money. It’s about developing good work habits and an appreciation for that dollar earned. Mine managed to hold a job all through high school AND earn a full tuition scholarship to a top ten school. He’s now in law school on a scholarship and owns his own home.</p>
<p>"But it’s not just about the money. It’s about developing good work habits "</p>
<p>-Exactly. If you think that having straight A’s and going to sport practice every night, compete on many weekends, represent their school,…etc. is MUCH EASIER than wait the tables, yes, go ahead and call these kids lazy and send them to fast food after all they do,… I am trying to be reasonable and a I have mentioned most (almost all) work anyway, maybe not every single day at their parents place, but in my eyes (I know you disagree, which is fine), they deserve their “things” on parent’s dime, it is a “dime” afterall in comparison to how much they are saving in college tuition. And, they as everybody else do work at college also, except they are getting better jobs there too, they do not wait tables, they work as profs’ assistants, do Research…you may continue calling them lazy though…
Your child is a genius if he was able to work every day and have all these A’s. Most work in a summer, since they are out of the house from 7am until 10pm for most days. Do you want them to work after 10pm? I am not sure I understand…Anyway everybody has their own ways and to say that one way is better than another is not right.</p>
<p>I agree it is about developing good work habits, learning responsibility and managing time. I worked since I was 15 and managed to get through high school and college just fine and developed good skills. Also, I already knew what kind of work I did and did not like to do.</p>
<p>My D would have loved to been able to work at 12. Unfortunately, even now at 15, no one hires them at this age. Older D, worked since 16 and now in college has two part-time jobs she has been able to manage her schedule so they don’t overlap and her classes as well. She still has most weekends off and hopefully will graduate early. I don’t know how she does it but at this age they have the energy and hopefully the motivation. This money helps her get stuff she wants without having to beg us for $ or justify her purchases. She is learning to manage her money as well, sometimes through hard lessons (cant’ go to movies, spent too much and my paycheck is not for a couple of days) but they can afford to make these mistakes now., while parent is at least paying for a meal plan.</p>
<p>Unless, the child is struggling through school, I don’t see why they cannot do reasonable work, if available. They are required to do volunteer work as young as 13 in my area. Some of this work is similar to paid work and don’t get me started on the sport commitments that go into the weekends and late into school nights.</p>
<p>^As I have mentioned prctically everybody works and volunteers and do sports/music/art at HS. Mine did all of these thru HS, college and she is NOT on any scholarships at Med. School, but she can teach her classmates few skills (just because they asked and because she has awesome skills developed thru EC’s and her jobs) and participate in musical show fund raisers for Free Clinic (again because she has developed skills, taking her time and NOT working every day), she could go abroad to work FOR FREE at clinics in poor places and speak their language and translate to docs, again because, she has spend time OUTSIDE of her Med. School to learn Medical Spanish…and, yes, we continue paying for all of these, hoping to be able to continue supporting her. As far as I know, no Med. Student working thugh Med. School. I know that at least D. absolutely cannot afford it, she needs to study. Maybe there are geniuses out there, but again everybody is different…</p>
<p>Oh Please. DD2 does no chores whatsoever (Mt. Laundry, elevation 8 feet, has stood as an occasional monument to her dislike of chores). Yet she’s an academic all star with an amazing work ethic (never once in K thru 8 I had to ask her if her homework was done, it was).</p>
<p>These threads always end up very judgmental. My D has a lot on her plate with school and EC’s also, and does not have time to work. She does a little volunteer work when she can. I am not worried about her work ethic. I worked 20-25 hours a week during my last 2 years of HS, and between that and school work I had no time for ECs at all. I never spent my money, it all went in the bank for college. I would not want my kids to have that burden. My D has played club sports in the summer, so has not held a summer job either, but will after senior year. You may want your child to work during school, fine with me, but just because it works for your family, it doesn’t mean it should be mandatory for the rest of us!</p>
<p>I agree that earning money is a great thing, starting as young as one can.</p>
<p>Back in the dark ages when I was a kid (starting at 12 years old), we worked all summer long picking vegetables and fruit in the fields. Starting at 5:30 am, and coming home around 4pm, with hardly any running water and having lovely wood outhouses. It was a great way to earn money and all the kids did it. The nice thing was it was just for the summer and then we could concentrate on school during the year.</p>
<p>I never had an outside job as a child - Elbonian teens were expected to help out at the family farm or business - The only thing I learned from picking fruit (good) or helping glaze windows (awful) was that work is not all that is cut out to be :). So, when I landed my first couple of jobs there as a programmer I was not concerned with this ‘work ethic’ thingie but more with ‘how much money do I need to make to feed my hobbies’… Things would get done when they would get done, period. </p>
<p>Mrs. Turbo, having been born into serious wealth, never worked a day in her life till their country went into, ehem, some bad times and she had to work fast food to support her education stateside. The only thing working fast food (I loved her Dunkin Donuts shift) taught her was that being poor ain’t fun… You do what you have to do and that’s that.</p>
<p>To this day, I am not a believer in child / teen work. All we do is feed the system with available and eager low-wage bodies in exchange for a few dollars and getting the kids used to the decisions of management - in essence, teen jobs are the farm teams of the corporate world of tomorrow, teaching kids how to lay low, bust their tails for peanuts, and be thankful that they’re the ones with the funny hat and employee badge rather than the hordes outside looking. </p>
<p>Sorry, folks, as a parent I find this a bit too much to do to my kids. I’d rather have them free of labor and free of mind to study or pursue EC’s or any thing else that could bring funding to a college endeavor rather than have them blow away a summer to earn a few hundred dollars at best.</p>
<p>Cute, but there is some value that transcends book learning. For socially adept kids that can look a stranger in the eye and shake their hands and carry on an intelligent conversation I’d be inclined to let work slide…but there are those kids who can’t lift their head and look a stranger in the eye, carry on a conversation and self advocate; for those kids there is huge value in a job. </p>
<p>I see this all the time in admissions offices…the kids that walk up to the desk and the kids that hang back and let their parents walk up to the desk or worse the parents that are pushing their kids with their hand on the kid’s back to get them up to the admissions office desk. It’s one of my favorite things to observe in admissions offices. But as others have said this is one of those defining opinions where there is no correct answer.</p>
<p>Working my butt off in the farm fields as a teenager was not the worst thing in the world. It was what all the kids did in my suburban, middle class town and it was not considered lowly work or threatening to us in any way.</p>
<p>Yes, we got dirty, dealt with snakes, and lugged 50 pound bags of green beans, but we also had a lot of fun. We all felt that we had earned something at the end of the day, and competed to see who could pick the most fruit/vegetables. We got to talk with each other, play our radios, and watch our frozen creme soda explode all over the platoon bus!</p>
<p>It taught me so many things, and the memories are precious. I would give my kids the same opportunity if the laws weren’t so restrictive and the only people now allowed to pick our produce are the immigrants.</p>
<p>^^My H picked one summer and he has great stories and memories of all the “stuff” that went on in the fields and sheds. I remember all my high school jobs more vividly than I remember my early career positions. I remember the first and last names of the kids, my bosses, the environment…I can barely recall what my office looked like or the full names of people from some of my first couple jobs our of college. We never “made” our kids get jobs but they love the freedom of a job and they love have money to spend in anyway they want. I have two savers and a spendo. I do worry about the spendo one alittle bit LOL.</p>
<p>Work can be a good experience. It can also be terrible, taking time away from homework and sleep and exposing kids to the various cruelties of lousy bosses. </p>
<p>I’m not sure much is really gained by learning these lessons earlier rather than later. Is it really better to have a boss play favorites and screw with your schedule just because he can at age 16 or age 27? Yes, there’s some motivation in never wanting to go into a McDonalds again let alone work in one, but is that really the level of motivation necessary for a kid who goes to college? That’s more for the high school dropout.</p>
<p>I was fortunate enough to spend a lot of time on a farm around animals and insects and crops. But I also lived in a suburb. My kids grew up in a city, a walking city, so their exposure to non-dog, non-cat, non-squirrel animals was limited. One versus the other. I wish we could have done both but that’s not the way it happened.</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s about bad bosses or slinging burgers or scooping ice cream. I think it’s about working as part of a team and being independent from your parents which is a lesson used and needed in college. It also crosses socio-economic lines and some of the wealthiest people we know have kids who work and some of the less advantaged families we know have kids that don’t work. Some kids can get the skills playing sports or working with an active club or volunteering which is why I think a paying job or not paying job is an opinion that is shaped differently for different people. On a lighter note the squirrel suicide season has begun in our area with the little rascals darting around in the road in search of acorns with nary a thought to cars.</p>