<p>My D (junior) attends college on the other coast. She called this morning from the hospital. Apparently she found herself with a bad stomachache that, eventually, got so bad she called a cab and went to the university hospital’s ER early this morning. Turns out she has appendicitus and had her appendix out a few hours ago. All went well and she called once she was settled in a room–she’s staying overnight because her surgery was so late in the day.</p>
<p>My husband and I have offered to fly out but she’s assured us that it’s not necessary. Such a mix of emotions–fear and concern for her, sad that I can’t be with her as she goes through this ordeal, appreciation for her good friends that have helped and supported her through the day and who have kept me updated and pride in my daughter for the way she’s handled herself.</p>
<p>Feeling somewhat helpless, I’ve spent the last hour surfing the internet for something to send her. After looking at flowers and balloons, I think I’ve settled on something she’ll appreciate more…I googled chicken soup and her city and now have a few numbers to call in the morning. Hopefully at least one place delivers or is connected to a ‘waiters to go’ type delivery service.</p>
<p>Searching the forum is not my best skill but I’m guessing I’m not the first parent to post in this situation. Any other suggestions (or leads to other threads)? I’m just feeling sad and too far away from my D…</p>
<p>WOW! Yes, a call you do not want…ever! So great that your D is feeling OK.
Have you talked with the Doc? That would be the main thing for me. Also, how soon will you see your D?</p>
<p>Hugs!!! Lots of hugs. My D had a really bad staph infection, so I know how you feel at he moment. The good news is that if there were no complications she will heal quickly. Laparoscopic surgery leaves very tiny scars, as my H’s experience goes. Please tell her not to try to be “heroic” and avoid lifting anyhthing weighing more than 5 lb in the next few days (i carried DH’s briefcase for him to work), no jumping, no rough play, no PE, etc. Drill into her head that her doctors’ orders are to be followed religiously!
Hugs again.</p>
<p>Collage1 - so sorry your D had to go through this! I know you and your H are feeling helpless right now not being with her. (hugs) to you!
It sounds like she’s doing well and is in good hands. Hoping for a speedy recovery!</p>
<p>If she likes Royal Rivera pears (9 pears or 6 pounds), you can get them for $19.99 delivered by Harry & David, including free shipping (FREEFSD is the code, I believe). If she likes bartlet & bosch, you can get a box of 12 from Coscto.com for $24.95, delivered. Either would make a nice gift and be something she could share with her friends.</p>
<p>You could also send her a gift card (or cash) for delivery of food in her area. Kids are much more resiliant than we give them credit for. Glad she’s on the mend and doing well. </p>
<p>Note: Good that she confided in you–I never told my folks I had mono & food poisoning & was in the infirmary for each of those bouts until many years AFTER I had graduated & had started my career. I didn’t want them to worry and reasoned that there was NOTHING they could have done but stress themselves. My friends helped me and it was OK.</p>
<p>I did not have access to the doctor but, once I speak with D again tomorrow, I will see if I can do so. My D turns 21 next month and she and I have plans to meet in NYC for a week-end to celebrate. I’m so glad we have that trip planned!</p>
<p>HImom, I remember seeing the H&D pears on another thread and thought about that too. Maybe soup tomorrow and pears on Monday or Tuesday. I also think that, once she’s better, I’ll treat all the friends that were so helpful today to dinner with D. Makes me feel better to think I can do something/anything.</p>
<p>Yea, I was happy to see my D when she told me the bike she was riding had been struck by a motor vehicle. Glad she seemed whole and had even gotten checked out by the school MD, at her initiative.</p>
<p>Spacing out care packages is a great idea as well. Do remind her to FOLLOW DOC’S ORDERS & PAMPER HERSELF so she can FULLY heal.</p>
<p>You & your D will have a lot to celebrate in NY! Since your D says she’s fine, I think I could wait until next month and have a great time with her. I like your idea of giving your D $$ to treat her friends to dinner. I’m sure they’ll all appreciate it as well. :)</p>
<p>Tell your D this… When she meets with the doctor, she should pull out het cell phone and call you and then let you talk to the doctor. This is how I found out that my kid was in the ER with staph. She told the doctor that mom wanted to talk to her and handed her the iPhone. It was very reassuring for me to talk to the physician who was treating her, ask about the tests and drugs, etc. I almost ended up on the next plane to Boston, but both D and her doctor told me things were under control.</p>
<p>Re: sending food. Ask her doctor what she is allowed to eat for the next several days. H says he was told to avoid too much “rough” stuff right after the surgery.</p>
<p>I think I would fly out. She’s going to need some pamper recover time. I’m assuming you are on the west coast and she’s in the east, but you can be there by tonight.</p>
<p>But a thought: As sweet as the delivery of soup is (and it will be eaten), as I recall when several of my friends had their appendix (i) (es) out they were on liquid only for several days. That may be in the “olden” days…and the procedure be include only a tiny incision…but find out what the instructions are.</p>
<p>That happened to my daughters roommate their junior year. D took her to the hospital and stayed there with her throughout. I was unhappy because she missed classes, but that’s the way they roll.</p>
<p>I would fly out too, but my primary goal would be to get her settled with me in a nice hotel room until she’s back on her feet. I don’t know how long it takes to feel up to snuff after this type of surgery, but I can’t think of anything more depressing than leaving a hospital and climbing into a single bed with a not so great mattress (and probably not exactly pristine bedding) to recuperate in a dorm room while depending on friends to bring back food from the dining hall. I think at least a few days of pampering are in order here!</p>
<p>What is her living situation (dorm, apartment, own bedroom, etc)? You need to make sure she can recover comfortably. These days, they kick people out of the hospital with the expectation that the recovery will continue at home. (Once upon a time, you stayed long enough that you were well on the way to being 100 percent or close to it.)</p>
<p>If she is in a less than ideal situation, I think would be on a plane and check us both into a hotel for a few days to make sure she can get all better.</p>
<p>From the business side of things, I assume she is still covered under your family insurance. Make sure she gave the hospital the proper info and have her sign a HIPPA with the hospital and the doctor, so you can talk to them to clear up any billing issues. Without one, they will not talk to you since she’s over 18.</p>
<p>She doesn’t need you while she is in the hospital, but she may need you once she is discharged – both for help at her college home while she is recovering and to assist her with running interference with the college bureaucracy and keeping up with her academics until she is well enough to go back to class.</p>
<p>So get on that plane – but not until she gets out of the hospital.</p>
<p>When my S was in college he had to have a hernia repaired - not an emergency. He told me I didn’t need to come, his roommates would take care of him, yadda, yadda, yadda. Of course I went, and he was so happy to have a hotel room with a great mattress, clean sheets and mom for the 24 hours post-surgery. After that I was happy to take him home, settle him in and leave him to his roommates (he was in an apartment with 6 great guys). They really do still need mom. If it’s feasible, head out there today. She will appreciate it.</p>
<p>I agree with Marian. That’s what I did last May when my son was hospitalized. It was hard to wait, but I knew he would need more once he was out, and I couldn’t ask friends and family to help that much.</p>