<p>I had been explaining to people that S1s B+/A- GPA is really due to his overloaded schedule. Well, it is still somewhat true, but there is another reason. </p>
<p>S1 spends 30+ hours a week on EC’s, 20+ hours just on his research internship. He routinely burns the mid-night oil after coming home from his lab past dinner time. Earlier this week, while I was driving him back from his lab, I asked him if his grades would have been a lot better had he not had all this extra work. He shrugged and said, “No, it wouldn’t have been a LOT better.” It was then I realized that I had been in denial. </p>
<p>He was never cut out to be a 4.0 student in a competitive high school. He just does not care enough to do as well as he can in classes that he is not passionate about, while excelling to great heights in subjects that he is passionate about. Once he commits to a goal, he will work with great intensity and focus to achieve it while letting other things slide. Recently, he told me that if he had his way, he would have skipped the last two years of high school and gone straight to college to focus on his interest.</p>
<p>So, what are/were you in denial of? Please share.</p>
<p>I told my D. to drop one of her EC’s. She finally listen. In her case, it is not grades, it is being stress out continuosly, which is not necessary. She agreed that the reason why she is at college is to get high enough GPA to get to Grad. school and this is priority #1. She still has a lot of staff, but had to drop volunteering sorority board and number of credit hours for time commitment of taking prep. class for Grad. school admission test. Her grades do not fluctuate, I hope her level of stress will not get as high as last semester, she needs to be in great shape to take 5 hour test.</p>
<p>I’m in denial about the financial aspect of college. I feel ahead of the game in other respects but because I’m so hinky about money anyway, I’ve let this aspect get away from me. Though in my defense, I started making calls and such yesterday, so I’m trying to catch up!</p>
<p>I was in denial of the real cost of D’s top choice schools, and the impact that a divorce during her junior year would have on our ability to pay. Fortunately she fell in love what was originally her safety and got a hefty amount of merit aid.</p>
<p>I’m in denial about Son’s Army ROTC. My kid in the Army? The Army?!?! The whole scholarship app process seemed like an out-of-body experience. It’s not really happening, is it?</p>
<p>I am in denial about the fact that I never practised what I preach, that my Ds’ procrastination is a drop in my bucket, that 143 papers are waiting to be graded while I enjoy CC :(</p>
<p>I think I’m in denial about my older girls going away. I’m too busy, stressed out, ready for them to fly out of the nest… but I think it’s going to be very hard for me next year.</p>
<p>"I had been explaining to people that S1’s B+/A- GPA is really due to his overloaded schedule. "</p>
<p>Just curious about why you’re bothering to explain that to anyone. To me, your kid has a great gpa, too.</p>
<p>As for what I’m in denial of: I’m in denial of the fact that my brilliant college flunk-out almost 26-year-old son really doesn’t like academic institutions and may never bother to return to college.</p>
<p>I’m in denial of the fact that my younger S’s major – theater tech – may not be a ticket to jobs and being able to support himself easily.</p>
<p>I’m in denial of the fact that I don’t look like I’m still 40. :)</p>
<p>I’m in denial over the fact that there comes a time when you just don’t have the same level of influence over your kids. The work is done. Although my 87 year old mom still tries to influence me at every opportunity so I guess we parents never give up.</p>
<p>I’m in denial that my son has a talent and passion for rock music. Where in the **** does that fit in college? I want him to finish college and then become a rock star…</p>
<p>Truth? I’m in denial that my oldest has Asperger’s/depression/social anxiety. I forget all the time and it pains me to think what he’ll do after college. The structure of going to school, a strength, is helpful now, but then what? I don’t get why he can’t talk to others in any sort of outside-the-house environment. When I dropped him off at school after break, I said to him, “be sure to say hi to your friends.” His response, “I don’t have any friends.”</p>
<p>I’m in denial of the cost, too! We’re in the bracket where supposedly we can afford the full cost of sending our kids to college. Ouch! I wish our finances reflected that! Every parent of young kids I talk to, I tell him/her to start saving lots for college NOW. I wish we had started saving much sooner.</p>
<p>ML: I’m in the same boat as you, but really looking back, I’m not sure where we cut have cut enough to have saved the amount (for 2) that institutions think we should have. And we lived in a more expensive place, on one income, with ridiculously high taxes for 2/3 of their lives…the FAFSA & CSS don’t reflect that. </p>
<p>So should we not have taken them to WDW? (that would have been an extra $1500/kid in their accounts) No spontaneous trips for ice cream or italian ice? Not paid for ballet, guitar, softball, etc. and their accompanying equipment even though they only lasted through a couple of years? </p>
<p>Whatever. Denial can be a very effective coping mechanism.</p>
<p>I am still in denial about how much drinking my kids did in college. I worried about it before they went and I fretted about it while they were there. But now that they’re older, none of them has a substance issue, they all have jobs, pay their taxes, and are solid citizens, they talk in amazement about how much drinking they did, how much more many of their friends did, and I am in shock.</p>
<p>Stunned, that H and I who were in college in the free wheeling '70’s when marijuana was everywhere, never saw anyone spend as much time “wasted” as students today. Shocked that U’s don’t confront this head on as a social challenge, a risk management liability, and as part of their core mission. And astonished that parents don’t ask hard questions before packing little Jimmy and Suzie off to live in party-central.</p>
<p>But mostly in denial that this was me not so many years ago.</p>
<p>I’m in denial that when I encouraged my youngest to follow his bliss (Screenwriting), he listened, went to Film School in Los Angeles and will surely live 3,000 miles away. Oh well, I have the other two a mere 500 miles away. Nobody’s bliss happens in Buffalo. Even O.J. Simpson left here.</p>
<p>I’m thankful for airplanes. Then I realize I’m thanking airplanes for holding our family together. Crazy stuff.</p>
<p>I was in denial about how hard it is to get into a top 20 school. The kids in my high school who went Ivy would never get in today…and they were very bright, hardworking students. </p>
<p>I am so thankful that I stumbled onto CC before my son started the application process. </p>
<p>Now I am in denial about him going at all. Everytime I try to wrap my brain about the fact that “this time next year, he’ll be gone at college”, my brain shuts down. I’m working on it, I"ll get there but right now I just cannot deal with it. So for now I live in my houseboat on denial!</p>
<p>I’m in denial that our lives changed forever when the last kid left home for school. I keep thinking that ‘oh, they’ll be home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, the summer etc.’ when they are actually away so much more than they are ‘at home’. They are grown and they have left. H and I have to pick up and start this next chapter knowing it’s just going to be us.</p>