Checking My Privilege: Character as the Basis of Privilege - a freshman perspective

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<p>Thanks, jym626. I just spent a number of hours slogging through the the most recent 12 of my 60 pages of thread participation history. It is indeed a tedious process. I’m kicking myself a bit, because I had really meant to dive deep into the weeds of my Korean language study instead. I’m posting a link to an old P&E forum thread (which anyone interested in seeing the kinds of naked racism I referenced in my “wry observation” might like to peruse. I can’t guarantee I’ll postpone my language study in the service of providing more links to other threads—and I assure you, there were many others of its ilk—because frankly, learning the complex rules of Korean verb conjugation is infinitely more satisfying.
collegeconfidential.com/discussion/comment/10800754#Comment_10800754</p>

<p>Given that the thread appeared in the old politics forum, and political discussions are now strictly sanctioned, I would certainly not encourage that the thread’s topic be renewed here. The link is purely for the benefit of those who questioned my veracity (assuming they sincerely want examples of that which I referenced, and weren’t just trying to get a dig in). I would rather not state the username of the linked thread’s particular offender, because I’m not sure he still haunts the forums, and would frankly not like to see him appear in this one. </p>

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<p>Link doesnt seem to work, poetsheart.</p>

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<p>Hmmm…That’s interesting. I just tried opening the link I provided. I used the copy and paste technique, inserting the url between the prerequisite code, and it says the page cannot be found. Did I do something wrong? In any case, if anyone is still interested, do as jym suggests: Type my username into the search box. On page 12 of the 60 pages available to search, scroll down the list to the “Elena Kagan=David Souter” thread and start from page 1. Sorry, the thread itself is 12 pages long…Too much work? I totally understand. b-( </p>

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<p>A real life non-made up example: People have made a stink on CC and in the news about students calling for more gender neutral bathrooms on many campuses and even gender neutral locker rooms at Dartmouth. Waste of money! Why do these people think they’re special? Well, my kid has been commented to while just going into the bathroom (gay female in women’s communal dorm bathroom) to wash her face and brush her teeth. Do you have to be in her - I’m going to shower? Things like that. Well, is it too much to ask to be able to wander in the the bathroom on your own floor to brush your teeth in peace? Where else should you go - the utility sink in the laundry room? These types of interactions are not uncommon even on a campus that is generally liberal so if it’s “special treatment” to have available gender neutral bathrooms but people aren’t universally welcome in the facilities assigned to their actual gender what’s a person to do? I bet being able to just use the facilities at will w/o intervention doesn’t feel like a privilege but unfortunately it is. You could say, “Just grow a thicker skin” and I’m sure people will, but I don’t see where it hurts or takes real time out of someone’s day to stop and understand the dilemma. It is not unlike when blacks were overtly banned from facilities and lodging or what some people who aren’t white middle aged ladies like me encounter when they ‘gotta go’ and the only options is to ask to use facilities at a private business that usually doesn’t allow it.</p>

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<p>Thats absolutely awful, saintsfan. But is that “privilege” or just plain discriminatory ignorance?</p>

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<p>@jym626 Oh okay lol. I didnt look through all those pages because there were a ton </p>

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<p>In the small, singular context it is discriminatory ignorance, @jym626 or, to use the current term that people don’t like much, a ‘microaggression’. In a larger context if you are a person who faces these daily impediments going through your life and someone makes a comment or judgement or assumption or policy decision based on the idea that those impediments DON’T exist because THEY don’t experience them that is where the idea of privilege comes in. Because it doesn’t happen to me or isn’t a concern for me I don’t consider or accept that it IS a concern for others. </p>

<p>It’s like a cross between 3D chess and rock/paper/scissors though and I see how that is confusing. Yes, rock beats scissors but paper beats rock. We once had a crazy incident with an umpire in a HS ball game. He happened to be a black man but in this case black man in position of power trumps a teenage girl.</p>

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<p>Call me blockheaded, but I see the idea of “privilege” being conflated in some situations with minority discrimination or experiences. I have experienced ignorant comments about my religion, been discriminated against because of it, and have heard ignorant people use the expression “jewed them down”. The last one I just assumed the person was an uninformed fool and walked out of the store where the salesclerk said it. The other situations I just don’t see as an issue of “privilege”, even though those of majority (ie christian affiliated) faiths may be “priviledged” in some scenarios.</p>

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<p>Oh my…I have been lurking and keeping quiet but this made me snort coffee from my nose… Now shoes and band aids are privilege. Nude - to many a commoner will mean naked. Nude is a fashion industry created term. Why would ‘white’ people wear nude shoes, wouldn’t they wear white shoes. And, from last check…there are plenty of black and brown shoes…all of which can be worn after Labor Day. But maybe those white men of privilege prefer to wear those nude shoes all year…who knew. And silly me…I put cartoon character band aids on the kids…and have been known to use them myself, and guess what…there are oodles of clear band aids available. Works for everyone…even Kermit the frog.</p>

<p>Good grief. </p>

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<p>And to me, “nude” shoes meant clear plastic. I guess fashion is not my forte’ And I dont need to see peoples feet/toes anyway. :blush: </p>

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<p>@dietz199‌ Lol, try not to show your privilege too much. The sole fact that you scoffed at this statement shows how unaware you are if the minority experience. Nude and Skintone clothing is always made catering to someone white. You wouldn’t get it tho…</p>

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<p>^^^ Ohhh…you are lucky…I see a lot of feet and toes in yoga classes…some of those things are pretty gross. I guess some of us have non ugly foot privilege.</p>

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<p>Uhm, nude shoes don’t match all (most) white people. And, if not finding shoes that match your skin tone is seriously being considered a societal hardship now we have all completely flipped out. </p>

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<p>While you werent speaking to me, but I have to agree that this is a bit over the top. Nude and skintone clothing?/ Huh? Not sure I’ve seen that other than on stage or part of skaters costumes</p>

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<p>Took a quick look on zappos. “nude” seems to be a euphemism for beige. If anyone’s skin really looked that color they’d probably need to be headed to the Drs office <a href=“Patent nude shoes on + FREE SHIPPING | Zappos.com”>http://www.zappos.com/patent-nude-shoes-on-sale&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>"Another was students identifying as gay/lesbian/queer …including White and higher SES asking those of us who are heterosexual or not transgender to check our heteronormative privilege when we betrayed obliviousness or made dismissive comments about the discriminatory treatment, homophobia, lack of inclusion in many areas of mainstream society, and burdens they faced as a result.</p>

<p>The last example is what I was reminded of when I read about the heated controversies of how transgender students were perceived/treated at many colleges. Especially Women’s colleges considering there were plenty of alum and student groups who had serious issues with their admittance…or in treating them like fellow members of the college campus community. Heck, a few even openly wanted those who declared their transgender status after matriculation to be kicked out because they were no longer identifying as women.</p>

<p>Interesting that PG’s comments betray the very blind spot transgender students involved and their allies were pointing out and criticizing during the height of that heated controversy."</p>

<p>Cobrat, how dare you? You owe me a big apology. You have, in essence, accused me of being like people who have serious issues with the existence of transgender students on campus. I have never said, nor do I believe, any such thing. I am fully supportive of people who are transgender and wish them nothing but the best. I might privately wonder why if they’ve come out as male, they might still want to be on an all-women’s college, but I totally accept that they’ve formed friendships and have no issues with them staying and remaining part of the community, and don’t for a minute think they should be “kicked out.”</p>

<p>That said, as was said upthread, if you choose voluntarily to remain part of a women’s community after now coming out as a male, then I think you need to suck it up and recognize that the campus community is going to be addressed as women, ladies, girls, whatever, and that you don’t necessarily need to raise your hand EVERY SINGLE TIME someone innocently says, “Hey ladies, come join the XYZ club” with a manifesto about the topic. It IS tiresome. It DOES shut down people who say these things in good faith and don’t have exclusionary bones in their bodies. </p>

<p>And saying “Hey ladies, come join the XYZ club” is NOT “making dismissive comments about the discriminatory treatment, homophobia, lack of inclusion in many areas of mainstream society, and burdens they face as a result.” It is possible to sympathize with those things and say “Hey ladies, come check us out” just like it is possible to sympathize with people who are in wheelchairs and still say “Run, don’t walk, to our next meeting.” Everyone just wants to take offense these days, and it’s not attractive. Not <em>everything</em> and <em>everyone</em> needs to be called out and recognized in every single possible statement. </p>

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<p>Actually, fashion blogs refer to nude shoes as “nude for you,” recognizing that people’s skin tones differ. And one can find plenty of shoes that are “nude” for many different skin tones across the spectrum. This is a non-issue. </p>

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<p>Saintfan - I’m confused by your example. Your daughter is female; she’s using a bathroom designed for females. Whether she’s gay or straight is irrelevant. </p>

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<p>Here’s an interesting article about Michelle Obama’s “nude” strapless dress. I personally like that crayola changed its color name from “flesh” to “peach” back in the 60’s . Forward thinking, crayola. Unless peach growers take offense.
<a href=“http://www.nola.com/fashion/index.ssf/2010/05/what_color_is_nude_fashion_deb.html”>http://www.nola.com/fashion/index.ssf/2010/05/what_color_is_nude_fashion_deb.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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Yup. Gets silly. Sometimes one has to bite their tongue to keep from saying “get over yourself”.</p>

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<p>PG- I think saintfan is saying straight females were uncomfortable being in the bathroom when gay women were in there. Quite sad.</p>