I had chores as a child and I always said my kids would also. Summers they do and here and there during the school year but not daily like I did. I just do not see how they would fit it in. I also had a PT job during the school year still got all A’s, was a class officer, NHS, played a varsity sport, etc. Yesterday my DS’s teacher said my son “needs to evaluate what is on his plate” If the pace of his class is too much so I certainly do not feel like I can ask him to take any time away from his studies. Do your kids have chores? If not, do you worry that there are things you are not teaching them? What were your chores as a child?
Well maybe this will make you feel better. I had no chores as a child. Never did laundry. Never swept or did the dishes. Never cleaned a bathroom or the kitchen. And yet here I am with a neat home which I actually like cleaning. I do the laundry etc… None of this is rocket science. It’s all a very un -steep learning curve.
And no my kids didn’t have chores either. They just had too much homework and activities to add chores. I gave way more time than they did. In college my daughter has more time for the most part and has had no issue dealing with these things at college.
As a child I did laundry, set the table and did dishes. I didn’t mend any of that, but disliked having to watch my younger sibling on weekends/days off of school. My kids did chores, but I did not require D to watch S on any regular basis.
My brothers had different chores such as cutting grass.I did not assign different chores based on gender.
D class of 16-loads and empties the dishwasher nightly, vaccums the upstairs once a week, folds all the laundry, cleans the kitchen nightly and mops the kitchen floor once a week. She has learned to do laundry and if her’s isn’t ready on laundry day she does her own. She’s an A student (with the exception of honors precalc), all honors, NHS, marching band, show choir combo, jazz band and has some volunteer things from time to time, She does not work. She gets $30 a week in allowance,
S class of 19- strips the beds, washes the sheets and towels, vaccums the kitchen floor and entry nightly, vaccums the downstairs and the basement weekly. He’s an A student too, but doesn’t have as much on his plate obviously. He will be in marching band, show choir combo and hopefully jazz band next year, and will start volunteering. He gets $15 a week.
I think the chore thing has a few facets. It is about responsibility, being a member of the community and time management. I never put money in their hands for anything they want to do, that is what allowance is for. I also hand them money for back to school shopping and let them do it on their own with the caveat they can not tell me in a few months they need x,y,or z unless they have outgrown something, They will have to do all of those things soon and I want them to be able to rely on themselves a bit. I have also taught D16 to refill a prescription, balance her debit card account, tip in a restaurant and basically interact in most adult situations. Sometimes I worry she does too little and sometimes I worry she does too much. But such is life.
Both my kids had chores starting as toddlers. Easy peasy stuff like putting all the stuffies and toys into the playpen before dinner. (I used a playpen in the living room as toy storage in a very small house lol). They graduated into empty small trash containers, folding towels, matching socks, putting away silverware from dishwasher…eventually they both started doing their own laundry at about 10 years old. S became responsible for the yard, trash and other heavy stuff, while D folded all the whites, vacuumed both sets of stairs, cleaned the bathroom top to bottom and dusted the house weekly.
Honestly, once D got into high school (and S had since moved out, they are 8 years apart) her academic schedule became such that I didn’t feel it was prudent for her to have too many chores. She is still responsible for her own laundry, cooks her own breakfast and lunch on non-school days, and will dust and vacuum if I ask, which I do every couple of weeks just to let her keep some skin in the game lol. She drives now and so of course that lightens my load tremendously, no more appointments or running to the store for her, in turn leaves me more time to get dinner on the table at night and be off my feet at a reasonable time.
FWIW, we were always a single parent household until two years ago when I got married so it was essential that I had some help while trying to work two jobs…both kids were pretty good about helping.
I had lots of chores as a kid. We had chickens, ducks, goats and sheep, so I helped with all of that. I mowed the lawn - 2.5 acres - with a push mower. (When I moved out and my only brother took over, they bought a tractor…thanks, mom & dad!) I raked leaves, and helped shovel snow. I helped watch my younger siblings - there was a big gap between my older sister and I (we’re only 14 months apart) and our younger siblings, so we babysat a lot. I washed dishes sometimes, but my mother didn’t like the way I did it so she stopped asking me to help with that. She also didn’t want me to use her washer & dryer or really, any major appliances. We didn’t get homework back then the way the kids do now, but I was a lazy student, anyway, and typically did homework last minute or not at all.
My older daughter is a neatnik and finds cleaning relaxing, she was always a big help around the house, but she didn’t have any assigned chores because she’s someone who just does something if she sees it needs to be done. My younger daughter is not, so she does have assigned chores - she puts dishes away, does her own laundry and is supposed to keep her room clean, which she does with moderate amounts of success. She cleans the litter box and once a week reluctantly gathers up the piles of stuff she leaves where ever she goes so the house stays tidy. She vacuums the upstairs of the house, but our house is tiny, it’s a small task. She also has a job as a section leader in a church choir, she only has 4 hours of work a week (rehearsal and one mass), but she makes good money.
My kids clean the house in the summer (4 lists of tasks that rotate), DS is in charge of the trash\recycling year round, both clean their rooms year round and change their sheets. By the time I was 13 I was in charge of dinner 1 night a week (planning, items on grocery list, cooking), cleaned my room, participated in family work days (firewood, painting, putting out the garden, etc.) at least once a month, had pets and farm animals to feed, water and clean up after daily, had daily household chores, etc. I am sure I grumbled some but do not remember the exhaustion I see in my own kids. My son asked for “time” for Christmas so he could get “it all done”. I am sure I never did that. I have yet to teach either of them to cook, manage bills or do their laundry completely on their own.
Of course I had chores! I did the family’s laundry, wash, dry (on the clothesline), fold/put away. I did dishes. I HATED dishes. And daily, during apple season, I picked up apples. We had a huge apple tree and my family didn’t want the apples to get wormy, so twice a day, my brother and I had to pick up windfalls. BTW, I can also make all kinds of apple-related products. I also learned to sew and sometimes made my own clothes, but fabric used to be cheap. That doesn’t save much money any more.
My kids had chores. Everybody was responsible for her own laundry once she got to high school. Each had a bathroom to clean weekly. They handled the pet care. They did less than I did, by a lot, but they also had part-time jobs where in my little farming community, there wasn’t much available during the school year.
Honestly, I can’t wrap my head around the notion that anyone is too busy to participate in the upkeep of the household he or she lives in. Really, at 16 or 17, kids have school and activities that they want to participate in, but yeah, slave mom will work full time and manage the house and schedule and still do all the maintenance because they are obviously too busy. No. And (in case it wasn’t already obvious) I’ll admit to being pretty judgmental when people claim someone is too busy with school/ECs to anything else. IDK, just seems like it reinforces an “all about me” attitude.
I did chores as a child. Wash/dry dishes, fold laundry, help iron, clean my room etc.
My kids haven’t had “assigned” chores but everyone has always had to “chip in”. Take notice and take care of something. If I bring laundry into the living room to fold and you are watching tv, come down and fold with me. If the garbage is full, take it out. Dishwasher dings finished, open it and unload at some point. Everyone is responsible for the pick up of their own room - I would tell them that I would vacuum their floor only if stuff was OFF the floor.
When the kids were little we would often have “5 minute clean up” when I would notice things getting too cluttered - too much stuff on coffee tables, the stairs, too many shoes by the back door, etc. I’d literally set a timer and everyone would stop what they were doing and walk around picking up and cleaning up for 5 minutes. Still do this with whoever happens to be home!
Yes, our kids had chores. And no we didn’t pay them for doing them. Those chores were part of being a member of this household.
DD is living with is now…and she has chores.
I had fewer chores as a child than my older sisters had, and I suppose that is true in our house too. My older girls had to pitch in more than we expect the baby of the family to do…partly because it’s easier to do the tasks myself . She has to load and unload the dishwasher , set the table , help put away groceries and feed the dogs at night.
Kids have chores now. They’re just different.
Does making sure your smartphone is charged and checking your Facebook take more or less time than milking your average cow?
Does anyone know?
I had chores back in the day mostly household chores inside. I had several time-consuming extra curricular activities and a couple part-time jobs during high school and graduated at the top of my high school class. My kids had chores mostly outside chores - mowing the lawns, exterior painting, raking leaves, shoveling snow at our home and their grandparents’ homes in addition to school or in the summer a paid job. And day to day chores like loading and unloading the dishwasher, cleaning the kitchen, and keeping their bathroom clean. My H had a very similar upbringing and more since he was the “man of the household”. Our kids all had at least one extra curricular activity going throughout the year and for part of the year a part-time job. I like doing laundry, but all three knew how to “do laundry” and would run a load if I asked. We did not give allowances or “pay for chores.” I think when kids have school and a sport or activity, chores and a summer job they learn how to balance and make better decisions about how they spend their time.
I know my kids had plenty of friends whose parents only required they get good grades in school and did not give them chores or expect them to have summer jobs.I also live in an affluent area where many people “pay other people” to clean the house and take care of exterior maintenance so that may be the driver for parents of kids who did not have those expectations for their teens. My H and I felt differently about what to do with our money influenced primarily by our upbringing which was remarkably similar. I did not believe that my kids’ job was to “go to school and get good grades”…I believe that is only one dimension of life as a teen or young adult and we expected them to be the best they could be with respect to work ethic.
My 16 month old grandson helps pick up the toys, unloads the cutlery from the dishwasher, cracks eggs when I’m making dinner and loves to be asked to put something in the trash. He doesn’t get an allowance 
Doing chores is party of the household. Mine didn’t have scheduled chores. Just did things when asked or when it needed doing.
I had no chores nor did my kids. I grew up to be a responsible adult and so have my children.
But VH…I bet your kids helped out when asked.
As a teacher, I had parents tell me their kids did nothing…not even putting their own laundry in the hamper.
I know this kid, 16 years old, high school junior who has parents who spoil him rotten. Ever time he has a chore, his dad steps in and does it for him. His mother still cuts up his sandwiches, brings his food right to him and they both take care of everything for him. I just don’t know how this kid is going to be responsible in college, but thankfully he seems to have a good head on his shoulders anyway,despite the parents.
Oh wait, that’s my kid. Gold help me.
Yes, my kids did put their laundry in the hamper. Occasionally.
Both DH and I worked full-time so we had household help. The children did help her but when they were young, they considered it fun!!
But seriously, the kids understood that when DH and I couldn’t do something, of course they would jump in to help out.
I remember when S1 was 7 years old. We kept the gerbil food in the freezer, so the bugs wouldn’t multiply. (Yeah, I know; I hated them too.) Once when I opened the freezer, the whole 20-pound bag of gerbil food fell to the floor and split open. Without my saying anything, S1 went to get the broom and helped me sweep it up.
Oh please, your kids have time for chores. Whether or not you want to give them to them is another matter but they certainly have 20 minutes a day to do some stuff around the house.
I don’t really remember having chores but I did the dishes when they needed to be done, did my own laundry, etc. I guess that could be called chores but I was rarely told to do them and I certainly didn’t get an allowance or anything. It was just part of being a member of my household.
Then was I was in high school, I was living alone for part of the time so I guess I did all the “chores” by default 
There were 5 of us growing up and we never had chores. All 5 are very successful in our careers and marriages.