<p>This puts a lot of our kids’ challenges in perspective:</p>
<p>CLEMSON, South Carolina (AP) – The alarm sounds at 6:15 a.m. and Clemson freshman Ray Ray McElrathbey starts a routine like few others in college football.</p>
<p>Along with classes, film work, defensive back meetings and football practice, McElrathbey sees that his 11-year-old brother, Fahmarr, is dressed and fed, finishes his homework and makes it to middle school on time.</p>
<p>McElrathbey, 19, has temporary custody of his brother because of his mother’s continuing drug problems and his father’s gambling addiction. The two brothers have shared experiences in foster homes and now share an apartment by the campus.</p>
<p>They live solely off McElrathbey’s scholarship while Clemson’s athletic department tries to get a waiver from the NCAA that might let them accept donations without jeopardizing McElrathbey’s football eligibility…</p>
<p>There are, of course, distressing elements in the family story. But what a beautiful thing to watch this older brother make a life for his younger. And if it takes a village - another beautiful thing to watch as his teammates, coaches… form that village for Fahmarr. I hope that the NCAA finds the right openings in the voluminous rule books to allow for the help that these two can surely use.</p>
<p>wow that is an amazing story…a brothers love is something truly amazing,as a younger brother of two awesome brothers i can certainly tell you that…amazing story</p>
<p>Thanks for posting this. It really makes you think, though–what is it about this young man that made him so compassionate and caring, coming from the circumstances he did? If we could discover that secret, what a wonderful world …It is always so intriguing to see how one person could grow up in this situation and be bitter and uncaring because of how cold the world seemed, and another one so full of hope and empathy. </p>
<p>I hope the boys both make it through–though it sounds like the “village” is trying to help raise the child. As others have noted before, it is hard enough to be a student-athlete, especially at a D1, in and of itself. There must be times when it is completely overwhelming for him. I hope that life is good to them.</p>
<p>Clemson and Furman are both nearby in South Carolina. Both are big football schools. Furman is a gorgeous private college and Clemson is more inclusive, more of a larger diverse university. Both have their good points but they are southern colleges and northerners may have a more difficult time adjusting, or just understanding some southern accents!</p>
<p>^^
Did I miss something? I didn’t see any references to Furman in the story or or any questions about how northerners would adjust. Last time I checked English was spoken eveywhere in the south! </p>
<p>What a great story. It takes a lot of maturity and unselfishness for a 19 year old to take on such a responsibility with the added pressure of playing D1 football. His love for his brother shines through. I too hope the NCAA will allow his Clemson family to help out this young man and his brother.</p>
<p>Oh, Packmom, you have a problem with my post? Too bad.</p>
<p>The POINT IS to give a basic understanding of the school and area. I really love people who go to all the trouble to post just to RUN DOWN someone else.</p>
<p>bhg,
I think packMom thought, as I did, that you were perhaps replying to a post that had been deleted. One that had asked about the location of Furman and Clemson and if a Northener would be happy there. </p>
<p>I know a local family that loves SC. Their older two kids went to Clemson and now younger one is at USC.</p>
<p>Great story!</p>
<p>P.S. Garland, (lol) I don’t KNOW if a post was deleted, I was guessing that!</p>
<p>Wha??? I am totally confused. Perhaps you meant to be posting to another thread? Packmom wasn’t running you down–she was, I think, also confused.</p>
<p>BE that as it may, this is an inspiring story. I really liked reading about it. It reminds me of the memoir “A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius” (ignore title) about the writer Dave Eggers, whose parents died of cancer within one month of each other, leaving him at 21 in charge of his 12 year old brother. It’s a quirky book, with a lot of heart underneath.</p>
<p>(oh, I just found out from the previous post that there was a deleted one. That explains the confusion!!!)</p>
<p>I hope something can be worked out so this impressive young man at Clemson gets some support. This would sem to be one of those times when there should be some way of bending the financial rules. </p>
<p>Regarding northerners in the South, I was surprised by backhadgrips somewhat random initial comment and his response to others, because it is not quite in tune with other posts I have read by him. I have to say that the amount of prejudice that prevails in the north regarding the south amazes me; as a lifelong northerner with children living in the South, I now realize that (like the North and the Midwest, the two regions i know best) the South is home to a lot of smart, nice people–some of whom do indeed have southern accents. Making blanket statements, even somewhat lighthearted ones, about groups or regions doesn’t further anyone’s progress or educational goals. Learning to live with people of different backgrounds or in a region with different lifestyles is for many students part of growing up and learning to get along in the world. Speech patterns and accents are a small but interesting part of it.</p>
<p>Let’s get back to the subject of the thread – the inspirational story of a college football player who – in order to keep his younger brother from foster care – is taking are of his 11-year-old brother.</p>
<p>When I taught at a 2nd/3rd tier college, I knew students who were overcoming difficult challenges while paying their way through colleges. This included a student who took the bus 1,000 miles to college, which she was funding via large loans. The student didn’t know who her father was and never would know because her mentally ill mother was dead. The student had also been raised by a grandmom who died when the student was 13. I had students who had: parents were drug addicts with AIDS; had a mom dying of ovarian canacer; had taken in a sibling under circumstances similar to that of the football player in the story. One of my students, first generation college, was taking a full load while working 30 hours a week, holding a top position on the school newspaper related to her major; and volunteering teaching English to migrant workers.</p>
<p>Seeing how they rose to their challenges was very inspirational to me and put the relatively minor problems that my kids and I had into perspective. I’m sorry that such students usually don’t post on CC because many of us – including me – could learn a great deal from them.</p>
<p>It will be interesting to see whether publicity will open the way for the NCAA to find some method to allow thsi young man and his brother to receive assistance. Given the power of negative publcity, as in the Duke case, it would be nice to find that in this instance the light created by positive publicity has led the way toward reason.</p>
<p>For those too busy to click:
"CLEMSON, S.C. – Clemson received permission Monday from the NCAA to provide assistance to a freshman football player who is taking care of his younger brother.</p>
<p>Ray Ray McElrathbey, 19, has temporary custody of his 11-year-old brother, Fahmarr, because of his mother’s continuing drug problems and his father’s gambling addiction. …</p>
<p>"The school had asked the NCAA for a waiver of its rule prohibiting athletes from obtaining gifts, cash or other benefits not provided to the general student population…</p>
<p>McElrathbey will be allowed to receive assistance, such as local transportation and child care for Fahmarr. "</p>
<p>I had read about this young man and brother in Sports Illustrated and am so happy to hear that the NCAA is allowing some assistance for them. He is truly an inspiration and an example of all the good that many of our young people possess.</p>
<p>This week, McElrathbey was granted a waiver of NCAA rules that forbid cash payments to college football players.</p>
<p>McElrathbey says he can now set up a trust fund for the care of his brother – who, he says, is also gaining a whole football team of older brothers. Robert Siegel talks with McElrathbey.</p>
<p>What an honorable young man! And it’s great the way the team has surrounded him. I wish the story mentioned what is happening with the rest of his 7 siblings.</p>