Ok so sadly I can’t ask advice from other local parents because they don’t have a kid supposedly wanting to go to college for MT so I’m asking CC POSTERS! Lol anyway my D is going to be a junior this fall. She has repeatedly said she wants to go to school for MT. Being that it’s so nuts and competitive, we have told her we should start planning now which we started. Just making college list of possible schools, researching etc. discussing location mainly & possible majors minors and BA vs BFA. Well I am doing most of the research it seems. She doesn’t seem that interested. Is this normal? I don’t have other kids to compare to. She will flip thru brochures we receive and that’s about it. Makes a few comments about NYC ( her dream school location of course) and once in awhile will comment on other schools but really seems uninterested. I’m surprised because she’s been doing MT since elem school and it’s her main interest. She seems burnt out almost which concerns me. She attends an arts h school so maybe that’s making it worse… Anyone have experience with this? I tried to bring up other majors even in case she feels pressure to go for MT since everyone seems to expect it & she gets defensive.
@theaterwork my D is a rising senior and she is just now getting active with the process. I know for her she was overwhelmed by the school year and by the thought of college, especially with this intense MT process. I did most of the research to narrow down the list and order information and now she is interested and has favorites. I did not push just kept researching myself until she was ready and receptive to hear it. Every kid comes around at different times. Your D is blessed to have an active mama!!
One thing I noticed going to an arts high school – it can be highly competitive amongst peers in an already highly competitive process. D found herself and many of her peers did not share with others what schools and programs they were interested in or auditioning for. Nor did they share how they were preparing, when they were auditioning, audition materials, etc… The secrecy honestly added another layer of stress to the whole process because there was not anyone to share with and talk to. That was one of the benefits of working with Mary Anna Dennard - for some reason D felt very free to share with others in Moo Crew, which she did frequently. But as far as sharing with her hometown friends and classmates- there was none of that. Looking back on it now, I think there was a real valid fear and concern among the kids that they may not get in the places they apply and they didn’t want to fail in front of their peers (even though we all know the odds are not in their favor and not getting in is no reflection on their talent).
College may also just still seem far away for your D. But we all know it will be here before she knows it. Perhaps you all could just go walk thru some college campuses whenever you are traveling or even in your hometown just to get her started. They don’t have to be MT schools. Just get her on different types of campuses to start getting the feel for big schools vs small schools. Maybe take her to some urban settings and some in smaller towns. Just to get her started thinking. Our D had been all about NYC for years, but when she really started looking at colleges, she realized an city campus was not her idea of college, and she took all of the urban schools off of her list and looked only at schools with a more traditional college campus.
Another thing you could do to get her motivated is get her one of the reference books like “I Got In” and “Before I Got In” that give an outline of what needs to be done and when in terms of auditioning for college. Having a better idea of a calendar/checklist for what needs to be done may make her realize it is time to really start thinking about all of this.
Best wishes to you! I’m sure she will get on board soon. Enjoy the process. It is an exciting time for both of you!
Junior year was overwhelming and my daughters least favorite of high school. Thinking of four more years of school was a bit unappealing, plus the push for college was starting at school to. We started campus visits the end of sophomore year and did a few in junior year. We had brochures from tons of schools and when she was so inclined she looked at them. We went to an arts college fair the fall of junior year and that helped make it a little more real, but in all reality she didn’t have her list until the summer before senior year. My daughter didn’t really talk to others about where she was applying because she knew the odds were overwhelming. People thought she was nuts for applying to so many, but luckily there were a few music performance majors that got it and since there were not in direct competition she was able to talk to them.
At this point in the process, it may feel like hurry up and wait 
I know my son lived in the moment, and the idea of college was more abstract than concrete. He came late to the game (mid-junior year). I felt he was “behind” from the beginning, especially after I read every thread on the MT forum He became more invested in the process after attending a pre-college program as a rising senior. I gave him a huge list of schools to look into and eventually he began to own the journey.
My S didn’t “wake-up” to the process until I put the “chosen” application materials in from of him in summer before senior year.
Both my kids weren’t really interested in college specifics up until the summer before senior year. As adults, I think we know how quickly the time comes - but as kids they really live in the moment.
For my MT kid, I think I did the bulk of the research on everything - and just gave her bullet points when she’d ask. She wasn’t overly excited about colleges like I was. =)) I knew that it would be this great new shiny beginning … the beginning of her future. I think she saw it more in abstract … and though excited, was a bit scared about it all too.
Honestly, I think you can put a lot of the college stuff on the backburner for the bulk of her junior year. The only thing that I would advise you (and her!) is to take the ACT and SAT at the beginning of junior year, figure out which one she tests better on, and then repeat at the end of junior year. I really don’t know how my kid would’ve fit in standardized tests during the beginning of her senior year. It was such a relief to her that she was done w/ that and moved on.
Agreeing with a lot of the above, it might just be that college still feels so far away! When I was a junior, I felt as if I had so much time until the mysterious “college years” rolled around… and then I blinked, and it was my senior year and I was auditioning! Luckily, I have a stellar dad who realized what needed to be done, and picked up my slack. He looked at travel plans, checked out unified audition dates, printed a list of all the schools with a BFA musical theatre, etc… This would probably be very helpful to your D. Once I was going into senior year and actually began having to pick schools to apply to and schedule auditions, it began to feel “real,” and my excitement/involvement levels went up. Having basic materials ready for me once I finally came into reality was a tremendous help! If she’s not excited now, give it some time. It may not have hit her yet.
Another possibility is that your D may not want to attend college at all. I only bring this up because, again, this was a phase I went through. I considered not attending college at all, and moving after graduation to go “make my fortune,” so to speak. After all, this was something many of my friends had done, and they seemed to be doing alright. I was also worried about getting a so-called “useless” degree in musical theatre. I feared I would squander years of talent, time, and (mostly) money, only to emerge at the other end with countless and haunting “what-ifs?”. It didn’t seem worth it for a while. I talked with my parents about this, and they were supportive and gave me plenty of good advice and guidance. Maybe bring this up with your D? She might just be nervous to approach the subject. I know that I was terrified.
Most likely, she just is a typical junior, still feeling like college is a million years away. You are already doing a wonderful job supporting and guiding her! It means more to her than you know, I promise.
@theaterwork we are on this road together (D also a rising junior). I am getting a bit of the same vibe lately. I think part of it is that we as parents are excited and nervous about the whole process. It is completely different than “normal” college process and requires so much more forethought and work. We love our babies and will do anything to help them go after their dreams. Otherwise we wouldnt have spent hours on CC when we first discovered it, right? However, I feel like I am getting a bit of the teenage “it has to be my idea” attitude. Sort of like when I suggest clothing when we go shopping. Sooooo I am preparing, making sure she is practicing and I know when it hits her, we will be ready. When crunch time comes if they are still dragging their feet, then we can be really super worried. In the mean time I will worry, stress and vent with you here on CC! 18 months until Unifieds…here we go!
Yes I think my D is just like someone said “living in the moment” and I think I should back off a bit on the gung ho research. @PrincessFiFi I think my D is a bit frightened by the idea of, like you said , having a MT degree and not getting employment etc. we have discussed that a lot. Also the thought of being on her own and alone at school is I am sure intimidating . She’s an only child and we as a family are pretty tight. She’s actually a young junior this fall and only turns 16 next month. So…I will continue to secretly research lol and make a pile of stuff so we have a list when she’s ready…who knows what next year will bring! @brightstaral yes will vent together!!
My D turns 16 tomorrow and is an only child too! So similar! 
OMG @brightstaral that is too funny! We are east coast, where are you?
Oh @brightstaral i remember you are in Alabama and we discussed SETC and going this March. We are def going as far as I know…we are in MD.
@theaterwork, I don’t think what you are seeing is unusual for MT majors. With everything else going on, SATs, ACTs, school work, school and youth productions… the research is daunting. My S visited the schools, prepared for the prescreens, and filled out applications. But he found the researching of programs as too overwhelming. And advice was continually coming at him from many directions…some conflicting. It’s a very nerve wracking time. It was much easier for him if I did all the research and made up a binder for him with multiple sections, each section for a different school with school stats, prescreen requirements, and audition dates. He was busy enough, come summer of his senior year, finding and preparing monologues and songs, choreographing dance routines and writing essays. I promise you, that if this is what your D really wants, she will become much, much more involved in the process the summer before her senior year. After all, you can’t audition for her.
^^^LOL…yeah, it was good for my kid’s sake that I could not audition for her. She’d never have gotten in anywhere!!
:))
@soozievt, fairly sure that there are a number of us, including me, that would buy tickets to that audition.
Thanks for the encouragement. At least I know now this is common. Just not one to put things off, my child is not me however!
@theaterwork I am like you.
My D was a junior last year and wasn’t ready to think about schools at all. I did LOTS of research, but she wasn’t ready to think about it. We went to a Visual and Performing Arts college fair in Fall of Junior year and she poked around and gathered brochures. I helped guide her to tables of schools I had pre-researched, plus we talked to others. After I got a rough sense of her top priorities, I occupied myself by planning a college tour trip for spring break to see what I thought would be the top choices. That really helped keep me busy without bothering her too much. When she was able to see the schools, it got her a little more engaged. Also, her favorite school on paper was no so much after she saw it in person.
It’s been a huge learning process for me too - to restrain myself and not talk about colleges all the time. It really seemed to stress her out. But now we are heading into senior year… so now it really starts.
Just a couple of random thoughts for you!
The MT college process vs the regular college process is like comparing apples and oranges. If I’ve said this once, I’ve said it a 1,000 times, I have no idea how kids who don’t have heavily involved parents get through the applying/audition process. (Though I know we have a couple of kids here on CC who’ve done it w/o a lot of parental help - and I really think those kids are super amazing!)
Not only do you have to get in academically first (most of the time), but you have to pass a pre-screen in a lot of cases to even be considered. And then the actual audition - which usually involves a hotel, lots of car (or airline!) miles … and lots of extra $$.
And then add in senior year AND shows. Yowza.
I really handled the bulk of all the college research. And since getting in ANYWHERE can be such a crapshoot, we decided before the process even started that she had to try not to fall in love anywhere until accepted. To have an early favorite could (and most likely would) create a lot of heartache down the road.
My kid ran into lots of other theatre kids that she knew from across the country (from camps) at auditions. In the end NONE of those kids had an offer from a MT program. Zero. Ziltch. And these were uber talented kids. And the reason was this: they only applied to a handful of programs (most of them the top ones) and didn’t really grasp how much of a long shot the odds were. Heck, I had a hard time grasping the extent of this and was frantically getting auditions on the calendar towards the very end of the audition season. Complete panic mode.
My job in this whole crazy year was to take as much stress off my kid as humanly possible. And most of the time that meant that my kids responsibilities were this: college essays, school, shows and the actual audition. Truth be told, I’m the one who did A LOT of the basic form filling and transcript requesting to colleges. And I’m really not ashamed. There is/was no way she could’ve kept up with it all and stayed healthy. It really wasn’t physically possible.
And for college admins who are reading this: please get on the ball and join the Common App. Jeez Louise. I really felt like every dang school had their own unique application process. Ugh. Wait! Even better: get on the ball with Otterbein and request that MT kids NOT apply until invited to audition.
I have no idea why I wrote such a long rambling post. It must be the full caffeine of my Donut Shop coffee. 
@KaMaMom this is good to know. I am doing it all it seems & I feel like I shouldn’t be but like you said not sure how in the world it will all get done on time if not! I only have one time to do this so thank goodness for that! I will say we know you must apply to a lot of programs to get in . We already have at least one safety school chosen we think. Meaning a non audition one and another identified as possibility.