<p>Penn also allows coed dorm rooms, but not for freshmen. They also have co-ed bathrooms in some dorms, which I think is very unappealing. I’ve found that the Southern schools are more traditional with separate male and female floors in co-ed dorms. Call me old-fashioned, but that seems more appealing to me.</p>
<p>momjr - I’m with you. I’m barely grasping co-ed housing - but completely draw the line at co-ed bathrooms! I understand the point of having a few such housing options for gay students and maybe upperclass apartments - but I have to say I think GWU is taking it too far. We’ll be visiting Muhlenberg in March - so that’s something else to ask about when we visit there - thanks for the heads up on that one Rodney.</p>
<p>Not a usual contributor to this thread, but gender-neutral housing is not new, and co-ed bathrooms have been around for a very long time. In the case of gender-neutral housing, it is usually for upperclass students (not freshmen), is completely voluntary, and in some cases students have to petition to request it. From discussions with my kids, those that choose it do not tend to be romantic couples, but either “best friends” of separate genders or those LGBT kids who would prefer to room with those of the opposite gender. No one is “assigned” to gender-neutral housing. As for co-ed bathrooms…many schools have the students “vote” on whether the hall bathrooms will be co-ed or single sex, and there is in most cases at least one single sex bathroom available in the dorm for those who don’t want to use the co-ed bathrooms. Showers are individual, and most have small “outer areas” for changing etc. And with the proliferation of suite-style living, this becomes less of an issue. If you don’t request gender-neutral housing your bathroom will, by definition, be single sex. Generally, no one is forced to live in situations with which they are uncomfortable. These conversations are reminiscent of the outcry over co-ed floors back in the day!</p>
1 Like
<p>Hi everyone:</p>
<p>I’m back from our whirlwind family bar mitzvah trip. I was going to find out from my H’s cousins why their daughter left Elon last year after one semester to go to UMCP, where she is now a sophomore and is thriving.</p>
<p>This is what I found out:</p>
<p>SHE felt Elon had only one type of student: white & rich. She was looking for more diversity. She wanted a bigger rah, rah type of school, she found Elon to be too small FOR HER and not enough going on. There were 250 jewish kids out of 5,000 students, not enough for her liking. She liked all the choices available at UMCP and felt Elon was too rural. Also, Elon was a 5 1/2 hour drive from home and she wanted to be closer to her family and at a school with more action going on. She also wanted to be closer to her BF, which, btw is no longer. But she is incredibly happy, her parents call it “glowing” and she is involved in many campus activities, jewish student union, working pt on campus and is extremely happy.</p>
<p>I guess that about wraps up why she transferred. Again, this is only one student’s perspective. I’m sure many others who go to Elon and have different experiences and are quite happy there too. Just thought I’d report her personal situation. </p>
<p>Is Dec. 15th here yet?!?!? :)</p>
<p>runnersmom - thanks for educating me - gender-neutral housing and co-ed bathrooms actually is not something I have heard much about. S1 looked primarily at southern schools - Duke, UVA, Wake Forest, William & Mary and Elon and I don’t ever recall it being mentioned. But now that I have had a little more time to reflect - I guess there is really no harm, as long as it is just an option. As Jewish parents, we are seeking diversity, tolerance and understanding for our kids - so why not for someone else’s as well? </p>
<p>ccc - thank you for finding out more about the relative who left Elon for UMDCP. Her reasons make sense - but I do want to point out that the Jewish population is more now than the 250 students it was just 2-3 years ago.</p>
<p>I actually had a very nice conversation today with a Jewish female student at Elon - the Hillel director arranged for me to speak with her. She gave me a very honest assessment of her experiences at Elon - not a sanitized version. Overall - it has been very good. She finds Elon warm and welcoming to Jewish students and she has also become very involved in Hillel. She also mentioned that most large Hillel events draw non-Jews as well as Jewish students. </p>
<p>However, she was honest about meeting students , generally from NC or SC, who have never met a Jew before - but says they were mostly friendly and curious. She also says there are some evangelical types of groups on campus, but that she does not feel harassed by them - mildly annoying at worst. She has never been called names or harassed in any way. So, all in all, a positive conversation. She was clear, however, that it is important to remember that Elon is in NC - not NY - and there will be cultural differences.</p>
<p>Hi RVM:</p>
<p>That’s great that they introduced you to a jewish student whom you could talk candidly to firsthand. Wonder where she’s from, did she say? In our cousin’s case, it sounds as if the southern charm of the school is what was not for her. She is used to being in a larger community, having grown up in Baltimore and guess the change was too much for her.</p>
<p>We have friend here who is applying to Duke…and loves the charm of the Southern hospitality…he also happens to be Jewish…hopefully if he gets in, he’ll have a good experience!</p>
<p>RVM: It was very nice of Elon Hillel to connect you with the student. It sounds like she was very honest with you. It does sound like Elon is committed to attracting more Jewish students. When you visit again you’ll have to see how your son feels about the atmosphere.</p>
<p>CCC: I’m with you on the wait for the 15th!</p>
<p>A parent on another thread posted this and I thought those here might enjoy this link to the Elon annual Holiday Celebration kickoff (“hot chocolate and Hanukkah, carols and Clauses”). </p>
<p>[E-net</a>! - Elon ushers in the holidays with annual ceremony](<a href=“Elon University / Today at Elon / Elon ushers in the holidays with annual ceremony”>Elon University / Today at Elon / Elon ushers in the holidays with annual ceremony)
[Elon’s</a> Holiday Lighting Ceremony 2010](<a href=“Elon University - America’s Top-Ranked Teaching University”>Elon University - America’s Top-Ranked Teaching University)</p>
<p>The girl that I spoke with today is from the Atlanta area. She did not attend a Jewish day school and was part of a very small minority of Jewish students at her hs. I still have another Hillel member to reach.</p>
<p>If I can generalize - it seems that those students who grew up having a minority experience will do just fine at Elon - or perhaps any school with a smaller Jewish population. It’s the students who had more of a majority experience - either by attending a Jewish day school or by living an a very Jewish area - perhaps parts of NY, Baltimore, etc., who might feel uncomfortable at a southern school with a small Jewish population. Gross generalization of course - I’m just trying to connect a few dots.</p>
<p>In addition to having a junior “B” student, I also have an older D, currently a sophomore in college. Older D is an “A” student - like RVM’s older S and some of the other siblings mentioned here. The college she attends would not be a good fit for a “B” student. While this will be the second time around for us, the experience will undoubtedly be different in many ways. </p>
<p>On the question of the relevance/importance of Hillel, I wanted to share that my older D is enjoying connecting with Hillel. Our family is half-Jewish, and D grew up celebrating a variety of Jewish and Christian holidays. When she set off for college, she didn’t “plan” to join Hillel, though she hadn’t ruled it out either. However, through a good friend on her dorm hall, she has learned more about what’s going on there, and she’s been thrilled to be able to participate in number of events over the past year and half, including a delicious Shabbat/Chanukah dinner this past Friday night. Her experience leaves me (the non-Jewish parent) feeling very grateful for Hillel!</p>
<p>Wow, my 3rd post in 2 1/2 hours…I guess this is more fun than unpacking, doing laundry and going through mail! :)</p>
<p>College4three and Momjr and whomever I missed that’s waiting for an ED acceptance:</p>
<p>My heart & prayers are for all of us to hear good news on or about Dec. 15th from 1st college choice…however, RVM does have good advice on how to handle rejection…hope that we all have the strength to help our children deal with the rejection…and how to help them not take it too personally!</p>
<p>On that note, we had 10 colleges on the list, now down to 9. Of the 9, we sent SAT scores to all 9, the gc office sent transcripts to all 9…5 apps. completed and sent and 2 more almost ready to go…that leaves only 2 left to handle after the 15th, if needed…I feel better about doing all the work ahead of time just in case. It’s easier to send everything now & cancel than it is to scramble at the end of Dec…</p>
<p>Peonies: So glad to hear your D is having a fun college experience highlighted by her pleasant Hillel programs! FYI: My older sister was going for her Masters and attended a Hillel dinner sponsored by the school, she met her future H there, and are now married 29 years!!! :)</p>
<p>Peonies - what a nice story - thanks for sharing. One of the things I hear a lot about Hillels is that they are designed to be for everyone - from the least religious Jews to those brought up with more formal Jewish education - to non-Jews who are simply curious (or hungry!). </p>
<p>ccc - complete agreement. This is the best time-spender in my arsenal - compared to unloading the dishwasher, folding laundry, etc.</p>
<p>After reading recent posts here, it is clear that every college has a certain vibe. It is our job to pick up the vibe and find the right fit for our kids. </p>
<p>I find it interesting that the article about GW offering gender neutral housing is on the front page of the Washington Post early December while many students are sending off applications. Clearly GW now wants to send off a liberal vibe, more than I sensed at its college tour.</p>
<p>In contrast, the discussion of Elon sounds like a very conservative school with a very small, but growing Jewish population.</p>
<p>I think Rockville Mom is right that a Jewish kid growing up in a vibrant Jewish community will likely be more comfortable in a school with a similarly large, active Jewish campus community. A Jewish student growing up in a very small Jewish neighborhood may be more comfortable in a Southern school.</p>
<p>mdcissp - how’s the Salisbury vs. Towson decision coming? I can’t decide if we should visit Salisbury in the spring or not. Meets many of our requirements for a safety school - except for no Hillel. I can’t remember - did you go back to visit it again?</p>
<p>[Housing</a> Changes for 2011-2012 - News](<a href=“http://media.www.muhlenbergweekly.com/media/storage/paper300/news/2010/12/02/News/Housing.Changes.For.20112012-3964755.shtml]Housing”>http://media.www.muhlenbergweekly.com/media/storage/paper300/news/2010/12/02/News/Housing.Changes.For.20112012-3964755.shtml)</p>
<p>"College affords us an opportunity to explore our world and consider new ideas and options. Students on campus have a variety of curricular and co-curricular avenues available to them throughout their college experience. Residential life is no exception. The College students are fortunate to have a wide range of housing styles to choose from during their four years on campus. This includes traditional buildings with shared bathrooms, doubles with private bathrooms as well as suites, apartments, and houses.</p>
<p>The 2011-2012 Housing Lottery will be adding the option to select gender neutral housing. Muhlenberg has allowed mixed gender groups to select suite and apartment styled housing for over a decade. The main difference was that students identifying as different genders were not able to share a double bedroom together. With a gender neutral housing option, students can select a roommate regardless of gender identity."</p>
<p>This is an article from the 12/2/10 Muhlenberg Weekly - confirming what Rodney ad mentioned earlier. I just want to share the info as this is a college that is on my son’s list and certainly meets the criteria of being a college for a Jewish “B” student. I don’t really have an issue with gender-neutral housing - it just seems to be a hot topic right now in college news. I would even suggest that it may be a good sign - ie - a school that offers this type of housing is going to be quite liberal and Jewish-friendly. So - I’m not making a political stmt here - just continuing to collect information.</p>
<p>2flipper2: I really appreciate your western list I can see S2 going that way and I have been wondering about California and even Oregon schools. You mentioned U of O on your list and I was wondering if you gave any considerations to OSU and if you found any positives or negatives about it. I’m interested in exploring SMU, which I know you said failed for you on all levels. Given what you are searching for I can understand why. What I’m wondering is if you uncovered any real problems or if it is just a matter of the Jewish population being too small and the surrounding culture being too Christian. Given its location and yours it would seem that at the time there was something about it that made it attractive enough for your S to go that distance. If you are open to sharing that I’d be interested in hearing that as well. I expect that my S2 will seek out a Jewish community and Hillel wherever he goes to school if there is any community to be sought. We have different criteria than you have but information regarding what you have found would still be helpful.</p>
<p>Spectrum2: We did not look at OSU, and I’m sorry- don’t know anything about it. U of O is the big school around here this year, lots of press with their football team. My son applied as a safety school since they have guaranteed admission with a 3.4 or above. My husband has an issue with paying out of state tuition to a state school. California’s budget issues are legendary but they aren’t isolated to California, so I kind of understand his point but we don’t know what my son’s options are yet so I’m not saying anything! We took a car tour of SMU in June, which I thought had to be the hottest time of the year, but I think it gets even hotter! In any event, that’s why we took a car tour with the AC cranked up! The buildings are so beautiful. The people in Dallas in general have to be some of the nicest people I have ever met. I have a Jewish friend whose daughter is a senior there this year. She has been very happy. But (there always is a BUT) there is a relatively small Jewish population. SMU has 6228 undergrads and 4663 grads; there are 250 jewish undergrads and 50 grads (4% and 1%). The odds of one jewish person meeting another jewish person are so small unless you join Hillel. The Hillel at SMU however, serves all of Dallas- a whopping total of 400 students. Hillel is not very active there. She has met few other Jews at SMU. I’m not talking become friends with. She has only met a few in passing. SMU is a regional school and the internships and job offers all come from the Dallas area, so she’s staying. Dallas has a thriving Jewish community, but it is very hard for a young girl at SMU to meet other Jews. In the very beginning it bothered her a lot. Now it doesn’t bother her at all. But in the beginning she flew home for high holidays; she doesn’t anymore, and she doesn’t go to temple either. I know she doesn’t light hanukkah candles because there is no one to light them with. She is losing her connection to her Jewish identity because there is no one to identify with. But I think it’s a great school. It’s a very easy place for us to get to and from- Dallas is a hub, so lots of direct flights. We happened to be dropping another son off at camp and so we took a look at it-it’s really nice, Dallas is a happening place, you should check it out and see what you think. You can plan on joining Hillel, but make sure there is one that is active.</p>
<p>Last night my husband and I went to dinner in downtown Orange where Chapman is located. What a beautiful little town! OK, so the xmas lights did add to the charm, but it is so cute! I’m not sure I saw any college kids there-too pricey, but a great place for parents to have dinner when they visit! </p>
<p>And, finally, the boy I know of who left Elon was from a very religious area.</p>
<p>time to light candles! happy Hanukkah</p>
<p>I just finished talking to my daughter and am happy to report that the counter-protest of Westboro Baptist Church at Harvard went off without any issues. The students were careful not instigate anything that could have led to an opportunity for WBC to file any lawsuits . They had a good turnout with plenty of signs that humorously (or not) mocked WBC’s gathering. The whole thing lasted about a half an hour. What my daughter found most disturbing was that the WBC included their children in their mission of intolerance and hate.</p>
<p>sorry! I copied spectrum2’s email so that I would answer the questions- meant to delete it before I clicked send!!!</p>
<p>2flipper2: Thank you so much for taking the time to provide such a good description of what you know of SMU. I know the minority feel isn’t a problem for my S but I was hoping he would find a larger Jewish community than 4% wherever he went to college. From the description of your friend’s daughter not going services for the high holy days and flying home when she first started school makes me think the Hillel may be weak. S has such an amazing bond with his Jewish friends from camp so I’m expecting that a stronger organization would be a better fit. I have heard that it is a nice school with a good business school and that is what had interested me in the program. We may make it up there this summer. We are planning to visit UT Austin and Texas A and M over the break so this should convey the large school feel. I still have no idea where S’s ranking will fall but that will pretty much be a done deal at the end of Junior year. At that point we’ll reassess.</p>
<p>Rockville Mom and others: We plan to go back to re-visit every accepted school. Waiting to hear about scheduling accepted student’s week-end for both Towson and Salisbury. We did not hear a specific Business school presentation when we went to tour Salisbury. Only know that they are building a new Purdue School of Business. The B-school presentation at Towson was wonderful. In the end, I think my son will end up at Towson, but still feel it important to see every school in closer detail (sit in on a class, tour Hillel, etc.) before deciding.</p>
<p>RVM: I suggest that your son 100% apply to Towson. It has everything you want (majors, Hillel, not too big, reasonable price). Perhaps he will get into the honors program at Towson.
Did you look at the honors program? Salisbury-if you want to go for a nice week-end to the Hyatt Chesapeake Bay hotel, or to Ocean City for a trip to the beach, then include a visit to Salisbury. If anything, it might help you clarify if you really want to spend the extra $$ to the private schools you are considering. Salisbury feels like it has the kind of academic experience you are looking for–the professors seem to really care about their students (from our talk at the tour open house), small classes, academic help available if you need it on campus.</p>
<p>Dallas: Waiting to hear from UT Dallas. Am concerned that it sounds like the SMU Hillel is not vibrant or active according to the recent poster’s visit. Also, SMU is far from UT Dallas and not planning to buy my son a car.</p>
<p>Anyone know if UT Dallas started a Hillel? We will inquire if there is the $1,000 minimum merit scholarship and acceptance. Still waiting to hear from UT Dallas</p>
<p>RVM and others: I still think the most important thing is how your child reacts to the Hillel and/or Chabad staff on campus as well as if s/he feels a social fit. I am not sure that size of Hillel is key, rather feeling a connection to want to go there is important.</p>