I wouldn’t even know what kind of attorney to call. I sure don’t have a civil rights attorney on speed dial. The only kind of attorney I have is an estate planner, lol.
I think the principal handled it poorly. It sure starts off this relationship on a bad foot. I don’t think it was unreasonable for the mother to ask to see the policy. Not showing it her makes it seem like the bluff it probably was. I think getting her daughter registered and saving the convo about appropriate dress for later when she was in private would have been the better option. Or even better, formulate the policy and mail to all parents so that no one is singled out before it’s been made clear. I think Mom felt embarrassed and disrespected in front of her daughter and felt she had to dig in to save face.
“Calling my attorney” can be a kind of bluff when the other party knows full well their behavior won’t stand up to public scrutiny. It also signals you may be more difficult to deal with than the other party imagines. I’m a small woman with a southern accent. I’m not always taken as seriously as I should be. But I have lots of resources and strategies to protect and insulate myself from the situation in which this mother found herself.
I get the trying to defend the call my attorney comment, but can we be real? Most people don’t have an attorney and the idea of even saying such a thing as a bluff would never cross their minds. This woman was just trying to enroll her kid in a better school to escape violence and bullying - I call this being a good mom. She was perplexed by the issue with her clothing and completely taken off guard.
I do hope at the end of all this nonsense her kid can go to the better school.
There sure are a lot of assumptions here. The student had problems with bullying at the old school. The mother had gone to that school **the same morning,wearing the same outfit ** and had had no problems.
The principal will have been told in no uncertain terms to say nothing more. What side? You think this is about sides? I doubt the principal was even at the initial parental interaction. How many principals are on hand in the admin office of a decent sized high school? My kid was a junior at HS before I could have picked out the principal by sight.
There is always more than one side. Always. The mom will not have said anything to hurt her case, other witnesses in the office may have a very different view of what actually happened. So I reserve judgment until an I investigation is made, and I suggest you do as well.
“Well Bobby, it would have been great to talk to your mom during parent-teacher conferences about how you we can better address your dyslexia. But you’ve seen the booty shorts she’s been wearing these days. Can’t have her on campus, so that’s that then. BTW, we are also cancelling your IEP meetings since I don’t like your Dad’s neck tattoo and mesh tanktop situation. We expect better from parents, Bobby. You should work on that.”
Oh,I already do. I even sent one of my kid’s on an exchange program for a week to a school very much like this one in the inner city of Houston. So I do have a lot of respect and sympathy for the teachers and staff in title 1 schools fighting an uphill battle everyday, and generally losing. I am pretty supportive of those engaged in the trenches that very few of us are willing to even visit. I don’t know this principal, or this school. But if she sincerely believes this will help save at least some of her kids, then she has my support. Interestingly, although the college confidential crowd is largely outraged, the PTO at the school, or even most other parents there, don’t seem to be at all. That’s something to ponder.
@yourmomma it fit the dress code. The woman demonstrated that the T-shirt dress was finger tip length and that is not a sleep bonnet.
If you are arbitrarily going to make up rules, then type them up later, and then the clothing still fits in the printed rules, you can’t continue to claim they violate the rules.
Lthe administration likely can’t comment on the specifics of the situation, but they often can and do make general comments. It having the rules already written and released to parents until the day after they were requested speaks volumes IMO. Obviously not for people who don’t even need to hear the other side before disbelieving the one presented.
Did I miss the release of more information from the others present? Did the registrar, office administrative assistants, school resource officer and police officers called to the scene describe their version of events yet? I didn’t see such a release, but I may have missed it.
There are always a person or a small amount that chaff at rules. Their attitude is “not me” but generally rules and laws are in place for a reason and generally are things that don’t impact really anyone except the few that think “not me.” It is the person that doesn’t move over when there is a lane closure. It is the person that goes out of the house in pajamas, the person who shows up at a performance or movie after it has started and has or wants middle seats so everyone has to accommodate them. There are “not me” people all over. The school just put some rules in place and the “not me” people are unhappy. They were not even unreasonable rules but “not me” people are rarely reasonable.
And rules that aren’t clear, are applied only to some and not others, are open to interpretation, or are apparently open to being changed as it suits those in charge are also problems.
You can’t just make up rules as you go along and expect everyone to be accepting.
Thanks to this thread, the Brewster t-shirt dress is now showing up in ads here and other sites. Had never heard of the store/site before but apparently they advertise on other sites. Thanks all. LOL
I can’t say I’ve ever really noted what a parent has worn when I’ve met them. Quite honestly, I’m still not concerned.
That said in school we are often teaching life lessons as well as academics, but I concern myself with teaching the kids. There are times when I mention I’m hopeful their generation can correct the wrongs of previous generations. There are also times we help the youngsters overcome less than stellar parenting. I’m not totally sure what they choose to wear fits in with those though.
We definitely teach that there are times when one can opt to use certain language/words and times when they shouldn’t. It would fit in there, but we still don’t correct parents.
People make up stupid rules all the time. Some deserve to be challenged. Not all in authority have the best intentions, logic, or rational thinking. History often looks kindly on those who challenge questionable rules. We’re humans with brains, not sheep.
