There are two issues being conflated here.
One. Is the mom who was asked to leave an appropriate interpretation of some unknown dress code. No - for the most part seems to be the consensus.
Two. Can a principal recognize a problem in her school and address it with a published dress code for adults on the premises. Absolutely.
Are parents being shamed as mentioned here several times?
Yes. if they are unaware of the adult dress code on school promises. They should only speak to them privately and give them a copy of the dress code.
No. If they are aware of the code or have been given a copy after a private conversation - they are shaming themselves if they don’t follow the rules.
Is this an outrageous set of guidelines? No. Can people look for exemptions and perhaps changes. Sure.
I sense this is not the underlying problem here.
It’s a struggling school and the kids are perhaps reflecting some lack of self esteem or hopeful outlook the principal senses is starting at home.
And this indifference towards school is being reinforced by the adults. Also, when she addresses a particular student dress or behavior - the kids point back to the adults on campus and say “why should I do x, look at how these parents/-adults come here everyday. Why can’t I “.
It’s also a women’s issue. Many feel this is targeted at women more than dads. Maybe it’s a reflection of the district. Maybe not a lot of dads coming to school. Maybe the ones who are coming on the premises are reasonably attired. I’m not there, so I don’t know.
It also seems that many women are sick of people telling them how to dress or to limit their sexual or individual identities.
It’s reasonable, how i dress shouldn’t make me a sexual target. It’s also reasonable to be put off.
This seems like it’s an offshoot of the leggings debate.
FWIW seems to be primarily a woman vs woman debate. Most men I know don’t give a fig or actually like them on women. So I think that’s a battle I will wade away from carefully.
This code is for a facility serving minors and adults on the premises are held to higher standard. I’m ok with that conceptually.
Once announced, just comply.
Perhaps the curler thing can be removed? Unless there’s a underlying meaning of complacency as determined by the community.
Perhaps these aren’t example used on the thread of the hard working waitress trying to do two things at once. It might be a thing in the district, I am not aware of and it could symbolize something else.
There’s also a racial and income component it feels like when reading previous posts. We certainly don’t want to embarrass any one culturally and because they can’t afford certain clothes.
I don’t see that here. No one is saying fancy dresses and suits. Or name brands or not.
It seems like the principal wants school grounds to be universally devoid of overly sexualized clothing. Also perhaps her concerns about bringing a level of seriousness to the school atmosphere.
Also since the principal is a POC, lives there everyday and is a woman, perhaps we can give her some slack regarding this code. There’s a revolving door here and she is trying to change things. Sometimes it’s different on the ground than our experience.
We universally beg for improvements and better educational opportunities for low performing schools.
Many which are inner city and poor.
She is trying to change a culture and we cry foul. Nothing changes, if nothing changes.
Maybe she has an idea and we should see that happens first. I’m ok with a couple of pissed off parents, if it in fact it helps to improve the outcomes for these children.
It’s hopefully just one piece of a puzzle she is trying to put together.