Convincing parents?

<p>Hi esteemed parents of the CC boards! :)</p>

<p>I was reading the thread by DadII about cell phones...and it got me thinking, how do I convince my parents to get me texting?</p>

<p>Currently, it's blocked on my phone, so if people text me...they sometimes think I ignore them. Haha. Granted, when I give my phone number out, I do tell them I don't get texting. </p>

<p>My parents just don't want me to obsess over texting like some teenagers do these days. As valid of an argument that it is, I'd still like some advice on how to win them over. :) Texting is just practical these days - it's used more often as opposed to a phone call!</p>

<p>Thank you, parents. :D</p>

<p>-MM</p>

<p>Find out if Smith's emergency notification system uses text messaging. It's quite common that colleges make emergency announcements by text, for example snow closings or (God forbid) a VaTech incident. </p>

<p>Also, if you're 18 perhaps you can get your own cell phone contract.</p>

<p>Good point, DougBetsy. I think they do, and I've used that argument. 'rents just said, if something happens, you'll know either by email or a friend running into your room telling you. :( [Which is a valid point, I suppose...]</p>

<p>And I mean, they're not trying to be cheap by not getting texting, they just don't want me to get addicted.</p>

<p>
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And I mean, they're not trying to be cheap by not getting texting, they just don't want me to get addicted.

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</p>

<p>This is not an unreasonable fear: We've hosted two AFS students who had serious additions to texting. One came to us from another family when the texting/sexting and other issues simply became way to much for them to deal with. Our answer wasn't a complete solution to the problem, but he was not allowed to take the cell to his room at any time. He had to do his texting in full sight, and that did cut down on the sexting. The other was our own student and eventually it got so serious (along with other issues) that we wound up having requesting an intervention that resulted in her having the texting cut completely off for the rest of her stay.</p>

<p>Our own kids are oddballs: Neither wants a cell; and S didn't particularly like carrying one when he was in Russia for a year-long exchange program.</p>

<p>Robin, I thought that AFS students aren't supposed to bring phones with them to their visiting countries. But yes, I get exactly what you're saying. It would just be nice to have it available as another means of communication. :(</p>

<p>Regardless of rules, some AFS students do bring cells (often at parents expense). More commonly, they'll buy a cell once they are here.</p>

<p>And I did forget a third student who got in trouble with the cell he brought from Italy. Unknown to us, his mom was calling him almost daily (at about 3 am our time) to talk to him about how badly we were treating him because we expected him to do his own laundry and help out in the kitchen. He moved out at his mom's insistence in Oct and the local chapter had trouble finding new housing for him 'cause his mom kept interfering via the cell phone.</p>

<p>All in all, cells are a mixed blessing at best.</p>

<p>Maybe you could convince your parents to let you try it on a "trial" basis with certain parameters set up for how many texts, etc. If you violate the parameters, they can cut it off.</p>

<p>See, I'm a little scared about that... I can't control who texts me, and that would make me use up the texts faster. I do like the idea though, thanks. :)</p>

<p>And Robin; That is a wild story. God forbid someone do chores! :P</p>

<p>Some parents won't pay for texting out of principal as seems to be your case. I suggest you just find out what the texting package costs (probably $5-10/mo) and tell them you're willing to pay for the package. If you're the one paying for it then hopefully they'll agree to get it for your phone. If that doesn't work then you'd probably need to go solo on a phone plan but that'll cost you more money.</p>

<p>Assuming you do get a texting plan, remember that the parents will get the bill and will see the itemized messages along with the timestamps of when they took place (at least on AT&T). It can drive a parent a bit nuts to see a hundred texts in a day - all a minute or two apart and to see text banter happening at 3 and 4 in the morning. The parents will need to get used to some of this but you can help by trying to be somewhat reasonable in not getting ridiculous on the texting such that it's invasive to studying and sleeping. Just be aware they'll be able to see it.</p>

<p>
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The parents will need to get used to some of this but you can help by trying to be somewhat reasonable in not getting ridiculous on the texting such that it's invasive to studying and sleeping.

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</p>

<p>And don't text at the dinner table.</p>

<p>That's one that got our AFS daughter in trouble.</p>

<p>I wasn't allowed to text until I moved on campus my junior year of college. My mom didn't feel it was necessary. Then she realized she'd hear from me a lot more often if I had texting and bought unlimited texting. Now she texts more than me. If you're patient perhaps they'll cave sooner or later. Texting can be expensive.</p>

<p>Who'd have thought that after the invention of the telephone so many would revert back to using a telegraph?</p>

<p>There are some texting plans I've heard of where you're charged based on what you send, not what you receive. You can look into that, if you want :)</p>

<p>You should live in our house; it is not unusual for my husband to have to most text messages in a month! Understand many are work related, but it also is not uncommon for him to text each child several times a day. If it kind of hard to tell the children to keep the texting down to a minimum when dad causes many of their text! </p>

<p>Actual, texting has allowed us to communicate better with our children, especially when they were in college. They didn't want to sit on the phone and talk to mom and dad all the time, but didn't mind texting us while hanging out with friends or in the library. I really feel we would not have heard from the kids as much if they didn't have a text plan.</p>

<p>Haha, great points. Thank you all! :)</p>

<p>
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parents will get the bill and will see the itemized messages along with the timestamps of when they took place (at least on AT&T)

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So, are you saying that on AT&T (because that's what I have currently) they'll be able to read my texts? Or are you saying they'll only see the number it was sent to and what time it was sent? I'm sure if they do decide to allow texting...they'll take a gander as to how "addicted" I am. Le sigh. </p>

<p>And I've used the argument of "I'll pay for my own texting plan!" They aren't budging with that because their main argument is that they don't want me to get addicted, not that money is the issue. :(</p>

<p>Do what I did! Find your parents' SSN(s), call up your provider pretending to be them and switch your plan. Most parents aren't technologically savvy enough to ever notice the $5-$10 change in their bill the following month.</p>

<p>Pay for unlimited texting, and ask them for a trial period. Since they'll be seeing an itemized list of your texts (not what the message says, just the number it's from and the timestamp), they should be able to see that you're not sending a ridiculous number of texts (even if you're receiving way too many--they shouldn't hold that against you!). </p>

<p>If you really don't get addicted, all they'll see is a few short bursts of texts here and there as you make plans with people, and perhaps a conversational text or two throughout the day. It might be wise to discuss with them what they think "addicted" looks like versus normal texting. Ten texts a day is not addicted. Fifty or more might be cause for concern. </p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>Would it be possible for you to buy yourself one of the pay-as-you-go phones where you purchase a certain number of minutes for yourself? I believe some of them even have free texting.</p>

<p>If they decide that you "have become addicted" they could cancel the plan you have offerred to pay for.</p>

<p>
[quote]
So, are you saying that on AT&T (because that's what I have currently) they'll be able to read my texts? Or are you saying they'll only see the number it was sent to and what time it was sent?

[/quote]
They can't see the contents of the message - only the timestamp and phone number of the message.</p>

<p>Another approach - tell them that you're off to college, a transitional time in your life where you need to take personal responsibility in many areas and you believe they've prepared you well to do so. One of those areas can be the management of handling texting without it causing adverse effects - just like you'll need to handle waking up on your own, scheduling classes yourself, eating properly yourself, exercising and taking care of your body yourself, handling other temptations in college appropriately. You can still offer to pay for it yourself - you can tell them that since they don't text you don't expect them to pay for it and you're fully willing to as part of your taking on responsibility.</p>

<p>
[quote]
Do what I did! Find your parents' SSN(s), call up your provider pretending to be them and switch your plan. Most parents aren't technologically savvy enough to ever notice the $5-$10 change in their bill the following month.

[/quote]
Very bad advice - if my kid did this they'd instantly no longer be on my cell phone plan and probably other ramifications. It's also illegal. And you might be surprised how technologically savvy or simply financially savvy (i.e. they read the bill) many parents are.</p>