I don’t think Facebook requires an account holder to fill the relationship field. It can be left blank. Facebook posts to me can be misleading. It just makes the grass on the other side look greener but what gets posted is what the user decides to post. Most likely the profile we see is the best side of one self. The milestones and the vacations - the good memories are captured. We see what has been presented to us, not necessarily what goes on in our day to day life.
How many of you would like a post of me saying I went to the library today vs. a picture of a couple formally dress for an evening out. I wouldn’t read too much into what is posted on facebook as we don’t have anyway of knowing what life is really like for a couple day in and day out behind closed doors.
Nobody reads anything into it until people start bombarding your feed with how pretty, tasteful, in love, well traveled, social etc etc they are. One can always change settings for these people.
I remember a few months ago something was trending called, “7 Day Love Your Spouse Challenge.”
“The Love Your Spouse Challenge was a challenge Facebook users posed to their married friends where they were asked to post one photo with their spouses each day for seven days to keep the celebration of love and traditional marriage going.”
@fallgirl I am not really into any facebook post challenge. At the end of the day you post what you are comfortable with. If another persons posts get to be too much it is just best to unfollow them.
I can understand a couple getting busy with raising kids and then forget how to be a couple when the kids are gone. It can end up being two strangers looking at each other that no longer have a lot in common which is unfortunate. At the same time if a couple is going through troubled times I don’t think they owe anybody details. Relationships change with time. Sometimes a couple is trying to put on a happy front for their children or other family members. I think it is best to respect their privacy and if possible just be there for support when needed. Everything does not need to be made public to everybody.
It’s not that people who don’t post or capture every moment and broadcast it hourly aren’t doing interesting things or valuing each other.
Most of us are advocating for privacy here and nobody is interested in knowing any details of anyone’s marital life or divorce saga, on the contrary we are asking for less details and no fake facades to impress others. Keep it genuine.
It really depends on the personality of the person posting. Some people like to keep things low key. Others are extroverted and genuinely like to share what’s going on in their life. Everyone has a different way of dealing with things.
I think the issue comes up when we start comparing our lives to others. If someone is posting everything going on in their life doesn’t mean we are missing out on something in our own lives. The problem comes when we start comparing and start feeling our lives are not giving us joy and happiness.
I must be really naive, because I assume the stuff that people post who are in my feed are telling the truth. I’m way too happy for them to question it. But I’m pretty picky with who I let in, so there’s a lot of pre-drama culling going on anyway.
I think Facebook is on some level a reflection of your own psyche, because you have pretty good control over what you want to see and what you don’t.
@raclut one of my friends tagged me for that facebook challenge (I don’t like facebook challenges because I’m typically willfully disobedient). I photobombed her feed with crazyface pics of H and I instead. She was like, no, you’re doing it wrong, and I said, nope, doin’ it right…
I guess I’m deranged, because I comment on things my H posts all the time, and vice versa. Yes, we’re in the same house and see each other every day, but we’re also curious, thoughtful, engaged people who share, comment on, note, muse on…multiple topics in life. Things we’ve been struck by, things we share from others, things we’ve read, etc. and we’re not constantly in the same room to vocally discuss. I think it’s a continuation of the perpetual conversation we share, not weird or evasive or odd.
I’ve got a friend who posts all sorts of things to her DH- like, “Honey, the laundry is ready to go in the dryer.” And hundreds of photos of the flowers in her yard. (Yeh, I blocked her posts from showing up on my front page.)
But I’m here to say, if you believe in the evil eye, you really should know the antidotes. LOL.
A friend of mine has made numerous posts (over a two year period) detailing her husband’s affair, the other woman’s evilness, her hopes to win him back, and the eventual split and her move to another state. She never posted lovey dovey posts before this, though. I hated that she made all of this so public, but on the other hand, maybe it helped her.
There’s a woman that I’m friends with on FB because our kids went to the same school, and because my daughter plays music with some of the same people she knows. Every post is about how wonderful she is, and her kids, and her life,etc. She’s always posting pictures of herself with celebrities, and bragging about how “classy” she is. I know that her life isn’t what she wants us all to see. I can’t decide if she annoys me, amuses me, or saddens me. I haven’t “unfollowed” her, so I might be the unclassy one.
I try to avoid political posts, and share the everyday funny things that happen to me. I’m very nostalgic, so I like seeing my friends’ old pictures, and hearing their stories. It’s been great to reconnect with old pals. It certainly can be a minefield, even if you’re careful.
Apparently its raw eggs (Mexico) or mirrors (far east). In italy it seems to be throwing salt in the doorway, and something with a pepper looking thing or olive oil (to test for the curse?). Then there is the “horns” gesture that an old bf’s mother used to do at the tv set when the opposing team was kicking a field goal. Google is your friend. http://www.everythingunderthemoon.net/what-is-the-evil-eye.htm
She was like, no, you’re doing it wrong, and I said, nope, doin’ it right…