As I write this post, I am very torn as to send our kiddo back to school. Maybe a parent reading this also feels ambivalence about sending their child back to boarding school - especially if you live a long plane ride away. At the end of the day, our concerns as parents are on our kid, more than the school as entities. It feels as if we are fighting 2 pandemics: COVID and anxiety.
Some how in this mix, we feel that our school forgot that we have more on our minds than just returning to campus. Like many parents, we are also worrying about an uncertain future of our lives in general- not to mention concerns about college applications, $FA, recruitment, and completing course requirements… For parents of rising Seniors, this is especially true.
Why I don’t want to send my kid back this year? This is not because of concerns regarding COVID, but because of the significant changes made to the school, its academic structure and its culture. For many parents and students, just the thought of being able to return to the leafy settings of the New England countryside is enough to write that check. LIke many students, our kid is thinking foremost about seeing friends and being back on campus. We sense a tipping point with our school of showing less concern for the individual student and more concern for managing risk/liability, as well as securing sustainability of the school during precarious times. That is just the reality of trying to reopen - it seems that there is no choice this year but for the school to focus on the “school” rather than the student. That’s fine if you are willing to make that deal. Fine if that is what you are willing to sign your kid up for this year. But ask yourself: Is it worth the emotional and financial investment we are making or spending this year? What about the burden on your child? Even with FA, most parents are spending a lot of money on an educational and growth experience that will be significantly altered this year.
In one of the Zoom conferences, a new parent explained to a school dean that they had not had a previous tour, a revisit day, or any on-campus experience. The parent asked if they could drive through campus just to see it either during or after dropping their student off. The polite “maybe/no” was framed as the school needing to adhere to carefully planned procedures for drop-off. I get this from the school’s perspective. Lots of plans for safety, distance, de-density but little talk of mental health needs. What about the perspective of a new student or parent? Can you imagine dropping off your kid from thousands of miles away or from another country - entrusting your 14 or 15 year old to a school that is in the tough situation of managing risks, as well as trying to meet the needs of 500+ students?
For our school, this year brings sweeping academic changes and more unknowns, as well as huge academic risks - that we believe are cavalierly presented as “just trust us”. First, the school decided to switch to a block system where students take 2 courses (2 hours each) per term. This means that he/she will crunch a year of AP Physics (for example) in just 9 weeks in the Fall. Another example, is cramming a year of Spanish 4 Honors into 9 weeks between September and November - with the AP test in May. I am of the belief that some subjects need a full school year - like foreign language. We wrote the tuition check in July, but were told in August, “This is your schedule of courses - like it or leave it. We will not change any courses, unless you are in the wrong level of course. No changes.”. For us, there are just too many “what if’s”. What if your student can’t handle the pace? What if that foreign language is not being absorbed well enough in an abbreviated term? What about the additional cost of taking the review courses you suggest in preparation for the AP tests? What about the burden the school is placing on students to cram an entire year into one term? How can you so smoothly tell us to “take a summer course at a college”, if you don’t get into the course you need to graduate from BS Academy?
Maybe our school administration believes that we should feel so lucky to be at their institution, so don’t question their plans and don’t be selfish to make personal demands. Some schools like ours don’t give US based parents a choice to be online or on campus. If you’re stateside or have a visa, you’re expected to come to campus. On the other hand, if schools really are so concerned about COVID risks to the extent that you must have so many restrictions on campus life & classroom learning, then why even open this year and take our room & board checks.? We realize that some schools do need the cash to survive.
For at least two other parents on CC I have spoken to, it is a difficult choice to send students to a school where the academic, social and athletic experiences are not what we had signed up for. Yes - there is COVID going on - we get it and that makes taking this risk so untenable. While our school boasts that they are following the protocols of 4 Maine summer camps which flourished without COVID, this is not summer camp and we are paying a lot of $$ for tuition with the aim of academic growth. Would you pay the same price of tuition to send your student to BS if it were totally online learning? That is the way it will be for at least the first week or two. Did our school totally forget this point that it’s not just about getting kids back on campus?
