<p>This thread is 2yo. An oldie but a goodie.</p>
<p>Speaking as someone who lives in the land of plastic (doctors and credit cards), trophy and starter wives (married once here), the answer is very simple: He is trying to be young, stay young, and has the ability to attract a young woman who enjoys being the center of attention and, if the relationship continues she gets a marriage sans financial worries. I don’t doubt the young woman is lovely, very intelligent woman. I don’t doubt the man enjoys her company.</p>
<p>Sorry, I have seen too many marriages with the young woman/old man end when the man gets old and inconvient. I have seen more than one career begin due to the connections of the older man. AND I have seen more than one man use a younger woman…until SHE was deemed “too old” and thirty (with two kids) to be the proper trophy wife. (He was fifty…married again, to a 21 year old…)…And did I mention the prenup?</p>
<p>If I sound cynical, blame in on the chardonnay…and a dear friend who is a famous divorce attorney. I am being sarcastic about the wine. And yes, I am usually more tactful. And if this is a made up premise by the OP…fine. It is NOT made up in real life.</p>
<p>Not only that, Ellebud, but what about the marriages I see here where now the 50 something wife is tending to (wheeling around) the (formerly) dashing older husband with all of his attendant health issues! I guess that sounds jaded but there’s so much of it where we live. Older guy on his second (younger) wife gets to be taken care of as time goes by. No picnic!</p>
<p>Did anybody see “it’s Complicated” ?</p>
<p>I liked that movie.</p>
<p>Go very slowly, OP. Power dynamics can occur if one is a professor and one is a student, even if at different universities. Is he faculty or some other staff person at the other school?</p>
<p>DKE: Yes, I’ve seen the scenario, personally and upclose. Only in this one the younger (by 30 years) woman divorced her husband when he became ill. He died in a condo, she got the big house. He was a very successful man who died alone. Did she love him initially? Yes. Did he become difficult? Yes. Did he die alone? Yes.</p>
<p>Thank goodness my girls are too saavy to be taken in by this. And when my son, then 19, told me that he was dating a woman in her thirties, he waited for a reaction. I looked at him at said, “Oh thank you!!! I always wanted a younger sister!!!” Somehow, it stopped the relationship cold. :)</p>
<p>When we were in our 20’s my roommate from medical school was swept off her feet by a man 30 years her senior. He was older than her father and he gave her nice gifts, took the starving medical student (he also was a surgeon) out for nice dinners etc. I felt sorry for his first wife (though she got the house in Newton and he the house on the Cape), when he left her and 5 children for my much younger roommate and yes, they did marry and had 5 more children.</p>
<p>Now fast-forward. We are in our 50’s, he is 80 something? I guess it could still work if he is physically fit and still mentating. Although we lost touch, I always thought it couldn’t end well. I know some will argue that they could still be in wedful bliss, but I personally just don’t see how it could work.</p>
<p>Didn’t even notice the OP was 2 yrs old! Wonder how that relationship ended up…</p>
<p>^I respond to old posts all the time! I never seem to look at teh dates.</p>
<p>I’m pretty sure this wasn’t real. Felt pretty fake and juvenile. Not to mention the person never came back on CC again (under that name at least).</p>
<p>My 82 yo gay uncle started dating his 54 yo partner 30 years ago! They have a fabulous life together. They’re leaving this week to see the Shanghai Expo. They travel constantly, have friends all around the world, and thankfully, are both healthy. Hey, ya never know!</p>
<p>I have given my daughter just one piece of advice on dating. Do not date a guy much older than you. </p>
<p>Echhhh. </p>
<p>There are plenty of attractive men your age.
A guy who wants to date a much younger woman has some issues.</p>
<p>There is something to be said when you and your mate are from the same generation. Something to be said about growing old together. </p>
<p>Some day, the guy is going to get old and lose energy. You are going to want to run around. Do things. And the old man is going to want to post on CC.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>My husband says the same to my daughters. :)</p>
<p>“A guy who wants to date a much younger woman has some issues
My husband says the same to my daughters.”</p>
<p>:)</p>
<p>Not only is the thread 2 years old… but the OP also was a gay male. So Woody’s post #50 is on target… the others, not so much, as I don’t know one way or another whether it’s appropriate to apply heterosexual dating assumptions to gay relationships.</p>
<p>Yeah. I didn’t get that from any of the posts I read, but I clearly didn’t read all the posts.</p>
<p>It was in post #19. (You don’t have to read all the posts – just click the user name and select the “find more posts” option).</p>
<p>Maybe we should redirect to a cougar thread:)</p>
<p>Tell your daughters to marry younger, women live longer!</p>
<p>It is tempting, though. When I worked on Wall street and lived in a crappy hole in the wall those dashing partners (40-something) definitely caught my attention. 95% of the ones who looked my way were married so that was a no-brainer, but that other 5%? I just kept doing the numbers in my head. Now I’m 54 and they’re 80. I’m glad I waited for Mr. My Age!</p>
<p>I can sure see many problems being married to a partner 26 yrs older, later in life, as in dke’s example.
But so many here are either overlooking the question here, or define dating differently than I do. The question here is dating an older man.
Isn’t dating going out and having fun with a companion? Maybe leads to sex maybe not depending on many aspects. That’s how I define dating.
Either I am off on how I define dating, or some here see the word dating as nearly equivalent to marriage!</p>
<p>True, Younghoss…got carried away into the marriage aspect of it. Have to say though I assume that sex is a given in dating these days. Was “back in the day” too. Not always a good thing, IMHO. (Lest I digress!)</p>