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<p>The whole concept of modesty is based on the idea that more skin = more sexual. It’s based on the idea that people can’t control themselves. Um, no.</p>
<p>And I wasn’t aware critiquing a culture was ‘crossing a line’.</p>
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I must say I was a bit put off by the originally quoted post. It was ignorant. </p>
<p>Covering up one’s body is to prevent temptation, as well.</p>
<p>We can learn to make decisions that become second nature to us, that can result in a course of action, i.e. not having sex, or not abusing substances, but it doesn’t mean that our thoughts are separate from our behavior.</p>
<p>Ive noticed that teens nowdays often do things in groups, from studying after school, to attending dances. Sometimes this is encouraged by parents, but teenagers seem much more conscious of the consequences of their behavior than they did when I was in high school.</p>
<p>When you’ve made a decision to do certain things with your life, you don’t want to get ambushed by your hormones before you’ve started & it can be much easier to stay on track if you keep focused on your goals and don’t start a physical relationships before you are emotionally ready.</p>
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As I have stated before, while many people view abstinence as a choice and sex as a default, many others see it the other way around. While no one will argue that being sexually mature and feeling attraction isn’t a natural phenomenon, many will argue that an innate conscience tells human beings that sex outside of marriage is not okay.
You say that Repede’s Pakistani friends (which would also apply to others with conservative backgrounds) have been conditioned to repress their feelings of attraction. They would probably say that people who have more liberal backgrounds have been conditioned to believe sex outside of marriage is okay.
The “cultural conditioning” argument goes both ways. And it does get very controversial, if I do say so myself.</p>
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A subjective assumption.</p>
<p>Why is this required to be modest?</p>
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<p>Copulate: Have sexual intercourse
Sex: (chiefly with reference to people) Sexual activity, including specifically sexual intercourse</p>
<p>:rolleyes:</p>
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<p>After I left my religion, I basically had to rethink every bit of my morality from scratch. I for one wasn’t ‘conditioned’ to think of sex as a default- I actually thought about it. It didn’t make sense to wait till marriage because there’s no good nonreligious reason for it.</p>
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<p>As someone who hasn’t had sex, you’re not in the place to talk about how detrimental it is outside of marriage. On the other hand, there are people who have had sex outside of marriage, been abstinent at some point (before they first had sex), and had it inside of marriage as well. Shouldn’t they be the ones to ask? Also, what do you say about gay couples then- can’t get married in most of the world (unfortunately).</p>
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<p>It’s like that cookie experiment from a long time ago. You had the option of getting one cookie now or two cookies if you waited 20 minutes. The children who waited 20 minutes had better outcomes in life overall. Sex, I hear, is a very intimate experience and is it not better to share that experience with someone you know you are committed to strongly, from a rational and emotionally mature perspective? Maybe I hold greater regard for love/marriage as a sacred (and religious, if you lean that way - I do) union than most people. </p>
<p>I want to be clear - I wish more Indian parents would be more upfront about sexuality and acknowledge that it exists. My parents are really liberal compared to most people and are willing to discuss things with me. I wish more were like them. </p>
<p>At the same time, I think Western culture is overly sexual and Indian cultural is a little too restrained (I blame Victorian England). If you read the original texts of my religion, they place high value on love and I think sex is part, but not all of love. However, does a teenager really * love * someone? I don’t regard sex as a purely mechanical activity.</p>
<p>Corey, what religion were you raised as?</p>
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So why do you have a problem with a parent telling their kid they can’t have sex? Especially, if they’re a religious family? Have you thought that there might be commitments that the parents want their child to make? </p>
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Oh, I have something to say on this. It’ll get a lot if people out of their seats, though. 
Why? Becaus there are a lot of liberals in the CC community.</p>
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I agree with you. I believe marriage is a sacred union. You are giving yourself to the person you have sex with. It’s not something to just throw at your 17 year old boyfriend you’ve been dating for a year.</p>
<p>I didnt say children should be having sex, I didnt say anyone should behave not in conjunction with their self imposed rules or beliefs.
However biologically speaking, healthy and sexually mature animals have sex.
Homo sapiens are animals.</p>
<p>Although generally more inhibited than the bonobos.
That might scare the horses.
[What’s</a> Love Got to Do With It | DiscoverMagazine.com](<a href=“http://discovermagazine.com/1992/jun/13-whatslovegottodo56#.UexW58u9KSM]What’s”>http://discovermagazine.com/1992/jun/13-whatslovegottodo56#.UexW58u9KSM)</p>
<p>Ecounter11- I was raised in Islam. Why? </p>
<p>Also, your analogy reminds me of that double standard analogy with the locks and keys in terms of my response- the the lock-key analogy I say “Vaginas aren’t locks and *****es aren’t keys!”. To your analogy I say “Sex isn’t like eating cookies!”</p>
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<p>Religion-wise? I don’t think kids should even really be brought up in one specific religion (I’d much rather all kids learned about many different faiths and their values, and make religious decisions when they’re a bit older)</p>
<p>(Gosh darn it- CC, why do you blot out the male reproductive organ?)</p>
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The concept of modesty is based off of the idea that being more modest is more humanizing (as opposed to dehumanizing- for lack of a better word). You see people only based on their words and actions, while their looks become moot. </p>
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Criticizing a culture isn’t crossing a line. However, to imply that the only reason people have for being modest is fear of others misbehaving for them is very offensive.</p>
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It is required to be modest for reasons stated above.</p>
<p>You provided a quote with one interpretation. Have you read the holy book yourself? Have you studied the history of the application of religious modesty? Do you know how certain interpretations are derived? </p>
<p>Let’s avoid the religious debate here. Besides, as far as no one is advocating that it should be forced on others, it isn’t relevant. Let’s focus on the topic at hand, separated from religion.</p>
<p>We are really getting off topic here.</p>
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<p>How is having more cloth on your body humanizing? Again, why would you consider looks anyways- people can control themselves from judging based on look. Even if a chick covers everything head to toe, people can still judge based on her eyes, no? Even if she covers her eyes, you can judge her on general posture, slimness, voice, smell, etc.</p>
<p>You eat a cookie because it gives you pleasure. You have sex… because it gives you pleasure. I think, increasingly, sex as a mechanical act is considered separate from the emotions that go along with. Is that a good thing? I don’t know. One might argue that teenagers might have the emotional connection, but are we/they mature enough to judge the strength of that connection? </p>
<p>I think ultimately it comes down to how you perceive it. </p>
<p>I was curious because you mentioned visiting India and morality based on religion has not been my experience, so I was curious.From my perspective - moral tales are found from the religious stories I read but I feel like logic plays a bigger role.</p>
<p>My stance:</p>
<p>When it comes to a child’s sex life the following must be done.
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<p>and…</p>
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<p>MyNameIsCorey, covering your body minimizes temptation and in a way keeps you more “pure”. What’s covered is for your husband’s eyes. This is not on direct response to wearing a hijab.
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<p>Actually, there is.
I say this as an atheist who does not personally believe in waiting until marriage (and I haven’t). To say there’s no good nonreligious reason to wait though is simply false. One good reason is that it significantly reduces your chances of STIs and another is that it is less likely to result in an unwanted pregnancy.</p>
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<p>So you’re comparing everything that gives pleasure to sex?</p>
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<p>Why marriage though? A monogomous couple can be together for years and live together and all that, and their chances of contracting STIs are the same as any married couples. Also, unwanted pregnancy happens during marriage as well.</p>
<p>There is a difference between tasteful appreciation of the human form and objectifying a person. I think the former is good and the latter is bad. I don’t really believe in modesty in terms of clothing because from my background, I perceive it as something humans added along the way. I think people have to make a conscious decision not to objectify and no clothing will solve that.</p>
<p>However, I don’t support misattributing false reasons as to why people wear certain garment freely.</p>