Ha.
“Uh…nope. Guess ya don’t get it. People have the right to say what they want, and think what they want. When you tell people what they must think, that’s the problem. Get it yet?”
Lol. Would you say this?
“People have the right to wear what they want, and think what they want. When you tell people what they must wear /u that’s the problem. Get it yet?”
^^?? That’s weird, lookingforward. Not sure a single person on this thread has said that people must wear certain things or they are “ho’s”.
@sushiritto , here are a few quotes I saw in the early pages of this thread:
“I also feel really uncomfortable when I see much older men staring at their body parts.”
“For women to say to men “just look away” from the young half naked girl in the mall is basically saying “go against your nature”. It’s a well known fact that men are visual people.”
“If you dress like a prostitute, why would it be a surprise when men of all ages stare at you, and think you may be one? Why would someone think they have the right to demand respect, when they are dressing in a way that shows everything?”
Maybe I’m misinterpreting, but comments like these seem to imply that men can’t help but ogle women wearing skimpy clothing (can’t control themselves), and that therefore women’s clothing choices are solely responsible for whether they get ogled or not. Personally, I find this line of thought insulting to men. I’ve never seen my husband ogle anyone regardless of their attire, and he finds it insulting when people imply that all men do this sort of thing. I was just wondering why more men don’t object to this. Sometimes I see men perpetuating the “it’s just our nature” thing. Maybe they think that absolves them from any responsibility, I don’t know.
@sushiritto , I saw your post about being pinched. Do you think she pinched you because of what you were wearing??? Anyway, if anyone pinched me for any reason, I probably would’ve screamed and certainly would’ve complained to the gym management. Did you complain?
Was the pinch flirty or “you need to lose an inch”? 
Either way, I’m not into people touching other people’s bodies, regardless of gender, without permission unless they have a very close relationship to them.
I’m smiling at the fact that you think your husband would never look twice at a woman wearing skimpy attire. Has he always been like this? If so, I would be concerned there could be an issue with testosterone levels. The fact that guys will look at women who are dressed scantily is really not a matter of self control, I’d imagine most would think there is absolutely no harm in looking.
@busdriver11 You don’t know my husband. I do. He doesn’t ogle women. I won’t discuss details of our personal life, but I can assure you there is no need for you to be concerned about his “testosterone levels”.
@doschicos I have single digit body fat % so I don’t think “pinch an itch” was the reason.
@cmfl11 No I didn’t complain. I didn’t consider it a big deal. Or even a small deal.
My only point is that I see men and women look at each other. Actually, the gyms where I frequent have a “no shirt no problem” type philosophy. Obviously no women participate. But many females are scantily clad.
Don’t worry, cmf11, I’m not concerned about your husband. But if it was mine, and he didn’t take a longer look at scantily dressed ladies, I would be worried about testosterone levels. That is a serious issue as men get older. And for women also. Or perhaps I’d wonder about sexuality.
But good for him if he doesn’t look a little longer. However, you can’t extrapolate that it is the norm. Even women will look longer.
On that note, I am spending way too much time on the internet beating a dead horse. Time to go exercise.
I stare (ogle) at men when they are wearing speedos with not so subtle bulge. I can’t control myself because it is just so obvious. I look at women when they let everything hang out too.
Most men I know (and women too) like eye candies. Why do you think so many of them wear sunglasses?
Sunglasses are good to prevent damage to our eyes, as well as disguising where folks are looking and many other things. I wear mine to prevent eye damage as my eyes are increasingly sensitive to bright light as I age. Anyway, back to the topic of scanty clothing.
Implying something wrong with testosterone levels? (She clearly said ogle.) As if testosterone uncontrollably drives men, there is no alternative, no control? He’s a slave to it? (That’s respect for men?)
You know, BD, I’ve admitted in the last that I’ve been slow to catch on when you’re kidding.
lookingforward, I do admit it’s not always obvious when I’m joking or being sarcastic. I’m really bad about using emoticons. If I ever appear to be personally mean, that is not what I’ve intended, and I have posted poorly.
However, as an offshoot of this, I am serious when I say that testosterone for us aging men and women is important. For many women, their levels are unmeasurable, and that’s not good. One of the first clues is lack of interest in the other sex (or same, if that’s your interest). But there are so many other things it affects, confidence, anxiety, feelings of well being. I have used buoidentical hormones for years, and it is one of my soapbox issues.
Thats a bit of a tangent, but somewhat relevant. 
Maybe he gets embarassef and that is why he doesn’t look. My H glances once in a while but who knows what he is thinking. The boys glance for sure. I do think there is a difference between an ogle and simply taking notice or glancing. We have friends whose husbands ogle and that is noticeable. But to not even take notice of the opposite sex especially a provacatively dressed woman or a guy with a great physique I think would be rare for adult men or women.
Now that I read @oldfort’s post, I realize I really need to wear sunglasses more often. I try to pretend that I’m not looking, and I don’t notice, but here I could have been wearing sunglasses all the time.
There was a guy yesterday at the Fisherman’s Wharf in SF, rollerskating, wearing nothing but a speedo. He had a fantastic physique, but I didn’t give him more than a glance, because honestly it was a little weirdly inappropriate to have nothing on but a tiny speedo in that area. Maybe if I had been wearing sunglasses…
We went to the Dominican republic when my son and his cousin were 13. DR beaches are topless. Before they went on the beach my husband and brother in law had the conversation with the boys. They had 2 suggestions, wear sunglasses and treat the topless ladies like the sun. You know it’s there and you can see it but you don’t stare directly at it.
Too funny but similar story from a trip we took with the boys when their age span was 11 to 17.
There was the time I was at that clothing optional beach in Europe…
But, discreet.
Obviously different clothing is appropriate for different situations; you don’t wear a bathing suit to work or a crop top to a funeral. But what women wear does not define their worth as humans- their intelligence, their character, the power of their minds. As a teenage girl, I am honestly appalled by some of the things that have been written on this thread. And I am happy that many of my peers are more open minded and willing to separate clothing from the things on the inside that matter much, much more.
Maybe if some of you saw me in person, you would think I’m a “skank,” or a “ho.” But honestly, I wouldn’t care. Because I know that I am smart, I am a good person, and reasonable people won’t label me as a slut for my decision to wear short shorts to the mall.
Hi @politicsdancegal, glad you posted. It’s always interesting to hear a younger generations perspective. I am curious, besides the obvious of “no bathing suit to work, or crop top to a funeral”, what do you consider is too much? What type of attire would you look at, and think, “Nope, I wouldn’t do that”.
Eyes wide open I say. As long as your boobs aren’t falling out of your shirt or your butt out of your shorts no one will probably give your appearance a second thought. The point is you can’t control how others will react or what others will think And you may not know unless there is a visceral reaction. Some people care about that and some don’t.