<p>Darcy, unless it changed, I note you had an appointment with the school yesterday. I’m sure I’m not the only one concerned. How did it go?</p>
<p>I truly hope that you and your daughter work this one out. She is not unusual in have emotional/mood/psych disorders at this age. This is when they tend to surface. In a sense, you are fortunate, in that the signs have clearly appeared BEFORE she went off the school. Colleges are not equipped to handle these issues even though they are now making more of an effort, or so they say. There are a number of posts on CC regarding this issue including one where a mother is agonizing about a daughter away from home who is struggling with a psychiatric issue.<br>
By taking deferral for a year, you and she can make headway on this problem. She can get a counselor at home to work with her, and I suggest she periodically visit the college,and that you and she find an outside of the college counselor for her there in the event she goes to school there next year. You do not want to grab a psychiatrist in the midst of a crisis. Perhaps some communication between the mental health workers could occur. It is far more important to get this issue resolved as well as possible before sending her off to a stressful situation like college.</p>
<p>Darcy, I would just like to wish you and your daughter well, and also to say that your daughter is not alone in this situation. </p>
<p>I and one of my best friends both suffered depression during our first years of college, both of us at a very high pressure university. In the aftermath, I was invited to take part in a psychological study run by the Experimental Psychology department, investigating the trigger factors and percentage rise in depression in university students. </p>
<p>Among the many results the study found was that “a quarter of respondents have probably experienced an episode of major depression”, but that the precentage receiving treatment was 2.1%. This, to me, is the most shocking and disturbing finding of all.</p>
<p>With the American with Disabilities Act and other legal and ethical issues I cannot imagine that any school would not grant a gap year or semester due to a medical illness. A Doctor can write such a note without noting the diagnosis since it really should not make a difference. The stress of the application process seems to have left her vulnerable so going into an intense academic environment does not make sense. The vey nature of Depression often prevents people from seeking help so I would not chance that she would follow up with counseling at the college. The year our first son was applying to college they had several suicides at NYU. There was an effort being made to do more to help kids adjust but how can anyone know what goes on in the mind of a teen. I think high achievers often mask their Depression through their accomplishments. Hopefully she is seeing a licensed therapist with a Psychiatrist in the picture as needed. The good news is that Depression is treatable and if you get the correct treatment and a good match for a therapist there is a very high success rate.
Please give us an update.</p>
<p>Best wishes from this corner, Darcy. Every college I know will grant a personal leave of absence without asking for details. Unfortunately, a whiff of mental illness, can bring sanctions, such as a diagnostic exam by the college’s chosen shrinks, or a directed course of action that has to be done for readmittance. Colleges are getting sticky about this, due to an increase in suicides and other problems with kids who are having mental illnesses. But if your daughter is going to work on living with her issues, she does not need the pressure of going back to school hanging over her head. If you can get a leave, fine. Otherwise, let it go. Just not important enough to distract you or her from the main goal for now.</p>
<p>She got her deferral. The official papers are arriving soon. 
I’ve already seen a difference in her just since she’s found out… she seems a LOT less stressed.</p>
<p>Congratulations and prayers for a successful resolution.</p>
<p>Thanks for updating, with the good news.</p>
<p>Good for both of you! My best wishes.</p>
<p>Fantastic! Congratulations to you both I hope everything works out well for your daughter :)</p>
<p>Nothing is more important right now than getting your daughter well. If it does not work out with the school there are other colleges, you have only one daughter.</p>
<p>Thanks for posting. I am very glad and relieved that things have worked out for her to defer. Hopefully the extra time will help her recenter herself and find the resources for the next challenge. Do be sure about her health insurance if she is not a student…some policies will not cover a youngster if they are not in school. For sure she would be eligible to be covered by COBRA payment. Good luck.</p>