<p>OK, I gave up on reading all the responses after page 2, but I did want to bring up one thing…sorry if somebody already did in the other 13 pages.
Your D might end up marrying this guy. Slim possibility, I know, but please be careful how you talk about him (lazy, not bright, etc). </p>
<p>This is coming from someone who married the “not so bright” guy and is still very happy 19 years later. OK, probably not what you wanted to hear. But I clearly remember some of the mean things my dad said about H. Just something to think about. </p>
<p>OTOH, I would encourage your D to at least try her “top tier” school for a year. Maybe after one year–if they are still together–you could agree to talk about it again.</p>