My 4ft 11 in best girl friend ( Jewish) was highly sought after by the short men on campus. Her husband who is tall had to actively pursue her as she wasn’t interested in a tall guy at first. I have 2 partners at my law firm under 5”5’. Both are married to women under 5 feet.
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My father was 5’3" (my Mom, 5’1"). I am 5’5".
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Your parents are like my parents. My father is built like a jockey.
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To women, Tinder is a dating app. To men, Tinder is a maybe I’ll “get lucky” app.
When women want to “get lucky” with no strings attached, they tend to use different channels than men because of safety concerns.
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How did the short men find their partners? School? Work? Church/synagogue? I’d like to give my son some suggestions, since he hasn’t had any success with online dating apps and has no interest in bars.
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All of the above.
What’s your son’s personality like? What will work for him probably depends a lot on that. If he’s charming, he has a lot more options. If he’s nerdy, joining interest clubs seems more viable. I’ve seen successful romances start in Anime clubs, D&D clubs, Orchid societies.
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Volunteer work? I’ve seen so many successful relationships in the various places I’ve volunteered over the years. It helps to be “working on a project”, or sitting around a board room table, or sitting at the welcome table to check in participants at the annual run, gala, Top Chef type event, etc. I imagine every town has its organization which appeals to singles or has the “dating mart” reputation. And so much less fraught than dating a co-worker…
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A few other suggestions, the gym, running meetups and/or biking clubs, cafes, etc.
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I’ve heard that Habitat for Humanity attracts a lot of female volunteers who mistakenly believe it will attract a lot of male volunteers…
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S is 5’6”. He met DIL on dating app. she’s only slightly shorter than him. My 5’6” nephew also met his wife on a dating app. She’s slightly shorter than him — they’re both MDs and we’re both in HI residency when they met on dating app.
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This thread made me think of a recent Facebook feed showing famous couples where the man is shorter than the woman. Zendaya and Tom Holland topped the list. They joke about the issues it caused while filming Spider-Man so clearly they’re very comfortable with it.
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The younger women in my extended family ( D and nieces) are all married to men who are not tall. Some of the women are taller than their partners. But none of them met on line.
When people meet “ organically “ such as at school, at a workplace, social groups, volunteering, parties they get a chance to show personality, sense of humor, intelligence or other positive traits without being screened out.
My advice for shorter guys is to concentrate on meeting women IRL as opposed to on apps. In addition they can become more attractive by simply making an effort with grooming, clothing ( something other than the baggy T shirt, baggy shorts, baseball cap look) and keeping in shape. So many of the young men I see today look so scruffy.
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I agree that it’s best to meet in real life when possible. If it had been an app, I would have screened out my H as too old, screened out another guy I dated and enjoyed his company as too heavy, another two as too impossibly thin. Is this all very superficial—of course, but that’s the reality.
H used to be in a lot of co-ed teams to meet girls—bowling, tennis & volleyball. We finally met in volleyball.
There’s pickleball now, biking, hiking, skateboarding, surfing, skiing, pet-walking, and other activities where folks can meet.
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My husband is an inch shorter than I am. I’m 5’8". We met while he was volunteering and I was working. We kept crossing paths, and he eventually asked me out. I perceived us as basically the same height, and it wasn’t an issue. Had you asked young me prior to meeting him if I preferred a taller man, though, I probably would have said yes. In reality, it wasn’t a deal breaker.
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Interesting article
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My husband and I are both around 5’-9" - I’m probably half an inch taller than he is. I was so happy to have an excuse to stop wearing heels!
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It’s not easy for tall women either. My daughter is just shy of 6 ft and doesn’t care if she’s taller than her partner (she’s been taller than all of her previous boyfriends) but many men don’t seem to like it.
She was talking about getting back on a dating app but decided against it. Instead she joined a new volunteer group, signed up for a pottery class, and is taking a business/eng class through the local university with 14 other colleagues (most of whom she doesn’t know). Here’s to hoping that expanding the circle will help.
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+1 on this! My (5’3) D20 said that her city is full of (her term) “short kings” - shorter men who are very attractive due to a combination of looks, personality, and above all…confidence. These things don’t always come through online.
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Shoot - pay walled for me.
Does anyone have a gift link to share?
Sorry @Hoggirl. Just edited my post and I think it’s the gift link now
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