<p>My son’s HS just had their homecoming dance last weekend and word is that there are more kids that do the grinding/pumping/fake-sex-on-the-dance floor kind of dancing then those that don’t. Our administration has conceded that they don’t like it but don’t really know how to stop it. My take is that if no adult in authority says no, then that’s as good as saying it’s normal and allowed. The Principal did say that if it get’s too explicit they will step in, but who knows what they see in a group of a hundred or so kids all bunched up. If your school has been able to stamp it out, I’d love to hear how.</p>
<p>I don’t think you’re going to have a lot of luck with this. You can more or less cancel the dance.</p>
<p>Are they hurting themselves or anyone else?</p>
<p>My solution when I don’t like someone’s dance moves is to look away. I’m not saying schools should give teenagers striptease lessons, but I don’t see much point in censoring whatever dance moves they come up with on their own. Parents came up with the same arguments against the waltz and then the Charleston…</p>
<p>This is not a problem for me. My son has a girlfriend and he says they do not participate in that kind of dancing. I have other friends with freshman daughters though that were taken aback and not real happy when unknown boys started “dancing” with them. I’m not really looking for comments about how it hasn’t worked or how not to bother. I don’t think you can really compare the waltz or the Charleston with humping against another person.</p>
<p>I know that there are schools out there that have put a stop to it and I’d like to hear how they did it.</p>
<p>I think parents need to decide what it is about this type of dancing they don’t like. If it’s just that we don’t like to see it, then I agree with Hanna. Do people feel it leads to more sexual encounters, that it is demeaning to the girls, etc. or do you just think it looks dirty? It’s been going on for a long time now and I don’t know if anyone can say it is harmful in any way. There are actually websites that include the etiquette of freak dancing so apparently there is a polite way of going about it.</p>
<p>Edited after kathiep’s last post. I would talk to my D, and I had this conversation with her in high school, about boundaries. It is a great example of a young girl deciding what she likes and doesn’t like and being able to communicate it. They should never feel as though they have to engage in something or put up with something they don’t like. They need to learn that at a young age and the dancing can be a teaching tool. My D always worked it out with a friend so they could “rescue” each other from someone who had trouble taking no for an answer at a dance.</p>
<p>Hanna, I do not think you have seen this type of “dancing”. It ain’t waltz or Charleston or even the hottest tango 
Picture two people (or more) on the floor, literally having sex with clothes on. That’s what it is. Should this be allowed in HS? Debatable, possibly. Is it a safety hazard? I say yes. If a fire erupts in a dark room filled with people, the kids on the floor have a much greater chance of being trampled to death/injured than the kids who run for the exits.</p>
<p>In my DD’s senior year in HS all dances were cancelled after too many incidents of such dancing during the Homecoming Ball. There were moans and protests, but the principal said “no”. The kids themselves had to come up with a solution to this problem to reinstate the dances. As far as I know, a committee of HS students determined that the reasons such dancing happened were: (i) venue was too crowded, too dark; (ii) not enough chaperones; (iii) wrong choice of music/DJs (too much rap and hiphop and not enough real “dance” music. After all of these issuses had been adressed, the kids had to sign a “dance contract” that included “no grinding” clause and spelled out the consequences. I’m not saying that it completely ended all grinding, but the majority of dirty dancing instigators did not bother to attend HS dances after that.</p>
<p>Some school districts have rules about what is/is not permitted at dances or make kids sign a “contract” that dancing will be “appropriate.” The principal here sends out an email to parents before dances reminding us to remind kids about the rules. (Easy for me–my kids aren’t interested in dances.)</p>
<p>Students who don’t comply are escorted out of the dance.</p>
<p>Wait… I’m sorry… You don’t want kids to grind because it’s a fire hazard?? LOL</p>
<p>Sadly, this is what dancing is like now. As a HS graduate, I have to say that we have some slow songs, but many of them are quick and involve grinding. I know parents find it repulsive, but it’s just how things are now. I personally do not usually grind (my bf and I prefer to do sort of a quick tango-like dance), but I don’t condem those who do it.</p>
<p>If you chose to hump/grind on the floor in a tiny room filled with hundreds of people - yes, you are a tripping hazard. God forbid you ever have to escape a building due to fire or earthquake.</p>
<p>“this is what dancing is like now”- Not an argument. Many teens choose to smoke, and in HS there are many who can smoke legally, yet smoking is prohibited on school grounds.</p>
<p>Buildings have fire codes and as long as the number of people in the room meet that standard, I think the fire hazard argument falls flat. What if there were the same number of kids just standing in place on the floor - would that be prohibited? Suppose they were doing the rhumba instead? They would still trip and fall over each other as they run for the exits.</p>
<p>Just found this on-line [Lewd</a> dancing roils schools - LancasterOnline.com News](<a href=“http://articles.lancasteronline.com/local/4/297785#ixzz11boGeZ7B]Lewd”>http://articles.lancasteronline.com/local/4/297785#ixzz11boGeZ7B)
</p>
<p>More on-line.</p>
<p>My child’s (Christian) school has decided that this year’s homecoming dance will feature swing dancing. The school held an assembly to teach the kids how to swing dance. We will see how it goes!</p>
<p>Our amazing state-principal-of-the-year is known for joining the kids on the dance floor when things get crazy. He doesn’t “grind”, but he mixes in with the kids and I can tell you, this works better than a bucket of cold water to calm things down. Too bad he’s retiring this year. A faculty or admin member who isn’t afraid to look a little ridiculous can go a long way toward changing things up at dances. My kids often came home and said how cool it was that Dr. X was dancing with the kids. Little did they know.</p>
<p>My daughters school taught swing dancing as part of american history in 5th grade ( they were studying the years around WWll) it was a lot of fun ( the next year they did tap)</p>
<p>My kids go to a “Christian” school, where the rule is “Leave enough room for the Holy Spirit”!</p>
<p>My son often compiles the playlist, and he has to submit the lyrics well in advance and get them approved.</p>
<p>BTW, we also “ground” (past tense of grind?) 30 plus years ago.</p>
<p>Most schools have policies against PDA. Seems to me that some of these more extreme dancing postures would qualify as the same thing. So how do schools handle PDA violations? </p>
<p>The solution seems simple. If kids are being completely inappropriate, kick them out.</p>
<p>Here is a sample dance contract:</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.cloverpark.k12.wa.us/Lakes/dance_contract.pdf[/url]”>http://www.cloverpark.k12.wa.us/Lakes/dance_contract.pdf</a></p>
<p>Of course, just like any rule or law, it only works if it is enforceable. :)</p>
<p>It’s not the school’s responsibility. It is the responsibility of the PARENTS to make sure their children have values and treat themselves and others with respect. </p>
<p>The grinding is a symptom. Parenting is the cause and the solution.</p>
<p>My older daughter, a liberal, went to one dance in high school, and never went back, thought it was too disgusting. Next daughter, a conservative, will go to the dances but not dance. Both thought it was dumb of the school to crack down on the freaking, though. Older daughter is now trying swing dancing at college at a Chrisitan house. I guess they know what works for them, and to let others do what they want to do.</p>
<p>I went to a high school with three different schools on campus, and each had their homecoming and you could go to any of the three (or all three) if someone from that school gave you their guest ticket-- you got two tickets to your schools dance. One of the schools, mine, was much stricter about this than the other ones. It also had drastically lower attendance (and still tons of grinders present) and I could convince none of my friends to go with me to mine even though we didn’t have enough guest tickets for everyone to go to the other schools dances. At the time grinding didn’t bother me. I didn’t do it but seeing other people do it didn’t offend me. Now I think it’s gross and would rather not see it, but back then it didn’t phase me. Unfortunately they played almost nothing but rap music and I genuinely think that people don’t know how else to dance to that kind of music. I didn’t for a long time and I didn’t dance at the dances for that reason until senior year when I had learned other ways of dancing.</p>
<p>We were a school that had junior prom (one for all three schools) and that was something that was actually taken away because things had gotten completely out of control (supposedly condoms and panties were found on the floor after the dance-- that did NOT happen at any of the dances I’ve been to!). The loss of that doesn’t seem to have made any discernible difference. The senior prom was still just about as vulgar as all the homecoming dances were.</p>