I hated when one of my sibs used to complain about driving to my parents (under an hour). Yes, it was often the holidays and you were trying to see both sides of the family, etc. But 1) what did you think when you moved that far out and 2) you had no problem driving 4 hours to your alma mater for a football game…
Years later, we nicely called sib out on it, and they were like “huh…you are right”. The driving was just an excuse (or maybe just one more thing). They hadn’t even realized it.
Another sib moved 2 hours away from my elderly parents and never visits or helps. Traffic…it’s so bad, etc. Boo hoo retired sibling. But we found out they were able to make it those 2 hours plus another 45 min past my parents for a golf tournament…
It hurts.