Do you feel like an outlaw as an in-law?

Parent Cafe
101

Many years ago friends asked me if I’d like to go to the Indy 500. It would ONLY cost me $500 (this was many years ago). I told them I wouldn’t go if they were paying me $500 to go.

I think I’d have the same response if your SIL/MIL asked me to go on this trip.

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102

I hated when one of my sibs used to complain about driving to my parents (under an hour). Yes, it was often the holidays and you were trying to see both sides of the family, etc. But 1) what did you think when you moved that far out and 2) you had no problem driving 4 hours to your alma mater for a football game…

Years later, we nicely called sib out on it, and they were like “huh…you are right”. The driving was just an excuse (or maybe just one more thing). They hadn’t even realized it.

Another sib moved 2 hours away from my elderly parents and never visits or helps. Traffic…it’s so bad, etc. Boo hoo retired sibling. But we found out they were able to make it those 2 hours plus another 45 min past my parents for a golf tournament…

It hurts.

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103

I don’t fit in with wife’s family AT ALL:

me: liberal, Catholic, graduate degree, big sports fan

wife’s fam: conservative/MAGA, evangelical, HS grads, no sports interest at all.

They almost look at me as if I am some alien creature.

It’s a miracle dear wife escaped them—she’s clearly the most independent thinker of them all

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104

I was very fortunate - I’ll never forget walking up the sidewalk of my future in-laws’ house and seeing my future MIL with her arms wide open, literally, to give me a hug.

We’re trying to do everything we can to treat our DIL like our daughter. I’m also fortunate in this respect - she’s a sweetheart. When we were in Poland for two weeks, I think I did a good job of not offering a single suggestion or piece of advice. :slight_smile:

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105

My husband’s grandmother was explained to me as incredibly difficult (and she often was) but she always said “there’s my girl!!” when I walked in the room. My husband says we have 4 kids when people ask – 2 of our own, and 2 inlaws. He and my dad were very close and he wants that for our kids’ spouses.

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