<p>So today I’m lying around nursing a bad back, and I was thinking about how to solve the world’s economic an political problems. But since I’m in no position to actually implement any of my ideas, that was too farfetched. So I thought about something much more realistic: If I was stranded on a desert island (hey, it happened to Tom Hanks), and could have only one person with me, who would it be?</p>
<p>I narrowed my options to 5:
Padma Lakshmi (Top Chef)
Alexis Glick (Fox Business Channel)
Kate Beckinsale
Rachel McAdams
Emma Watson</p>
<p>OK, I’m going for the Big Bore award: I’d like the one person to be my husband. He is a great traveler (once he gets where we are going–he doesn’t like the getting there part, if it is by air).</p>
<p>^ No, no! Husbands—no matter how beloved and resourceful—don’t count in this game. In the interest of self-preservation, I’m going to narrow my list down to men who have already been stranded on islands (desert or otherwise), in hopes that they have learned enough to build a sturdy raft to carry us back to civilization.</p>
<p>Michael Craig/Captain Cyrus Harding (Mysterious Island)
Robert Logan/Travis Maclaine (The Sea Gypsies)
David Strathairn/Joe Gastineau (Limbo)
Tom Hanks/Chuck Noland (Castaway)
James Caveziel/Edmond Dantes (The Count of Monte Cristo)</p>
<p>If I had to narrow it down to one, I’d take Captain Harding, not only because he was a hero of my early childhood, but also because he can handle any giant bees that might come our way.</p>
<p>“already been stranded on an island…”
The one who popped into my mind was that pretty blond boy on Blue Lagoon with Brook Shield. No thanks. I’ll stick with Tom Hanks.</p>
<p>The one thing that bothered me most about that movie was that in the scenes that were supposed to be several months after the rescue his face was all the same pale color, but you know that years of tropical sun would have made the non-beard areas darker for the rest of his life. Take the shirt off an old farmer and you’ll know what I mean.</p>
<p>I am with midmo, even though that’s not the point of the list - I’d go with my husband if I wanted to survive or have a chance of getting out of there. Couple of reasons: he was an Eagle Scout and knows how to do stuff like build a fire, make a shelter, fish. I was a Girl Scout (and even a Girl Scout leader) and never paid much attention to the survival stuff, though I know how to build a fire in theory. Also, if I picked some Hollywood guy, I’d feel too middle-aged and frumpy to really relate, if you know what I mean.</p>
<p>Although, if we’re just talking about guys who could be amusing or fascinating for a prolonged period, I’d go with Peter Bogdanovich or Martin Scorsese (I love classic films and they know everything). Also, Anthony Lane, one of the New Yorker film critics/contributors, because he cracks me up every time.</p>
<p>I’m surprised nobody mentioned Gilligan, the Skipper, and/or the Professor.</p>
<p>Before I made the original post, I toyed with the idea of making the premise: “I’m guessing one difference between men and women is that men can actually quickly make up a list of hotties they have in the back of their minds for occasions just like this, whereas women are more inhibited or practical and will say stuff like ‘my husband’ or ‘Michael Phelps because he could swim back to the mainland’ or ‘some survival expert from a cable show.’”
But I didn’t go with that premise because I thought it would be sort of insulting to the “liberated” womenfolk. Turns out I might have been right.</p>
<p>Of course, it wouldn’t be practical to have Supergirl carry too many people on her back. So I vote we leave Schmaltz behind…with Gilligan, the Skipper and the Professor. :)</p>
<p>Well, assuming that the desert island is a long term situation, I think I’d rather take along someone who would be interesting to talk to, since beauty fades (all that harsh sun). </p>
<p>If it has to be living people, I’d take:
Jon Stewart
Bill Clinton
Meryl Streep
Seth MacFarlane
Bobby McFerrin</p>
<p>People in the past:
Laura Ingalls Wilder (bonus: she would know how to set up housekeeping in the wilderness)
Peg Bracken (“I Hate to Cook” Books) or Betty McDonald (“The Egg and I” " The Plague and I") These seem like they would be clever women to chat with.
Upton Sinclair (he’s my favorite Socialist)
W. S. Gilbert or Arthur Sullivan (probably Gilbert would be more fun)
Patrick Dennis (“Auntie Mame” books) (I can’t imagine that he would be dull)</p>
<p>This is like the “people you would invite to dinner” list, but long-term.</p>
<p>Not that you gals are a little on the unimaginitive side, but I’m surprised nobody’s mentioned:</p>
<p>Barney Frank (he could keep me endlessly enraptured answering my questions with questions)
Martha Stewart (she’d know EXACTLY how to garnish a plate of roasted scorpions)
Sean Hannity (I’d kill him and boil him and eat him)
Oprah (we’d have a weight-loss contest and who couldn’t beat HER?)
Wilford Brimley (because he’s hot hot hot)</p>