<p>I find most people to be totally about themselves. It is hard to find kind, genuine people like I strive to be.</p>
<p>I am the giving, supportive type and when I need support my friends are too into themselves to care much about anything but what is going on with them. It hurts!</p>
<p>I have found that you can meet some of the nicest, most genuince and giving people when you volunteer and meet other volunteers and those in non-profits and schools and similar settings. I have never had trouble meeting wonderful, giving, thoughtful, genuine, kind people in many settings. Actually, I am more surprised when I meet people who AREN’T!</p>
<p>There are exceptions, but generally I find that people get less self centered as they get older (not all… but a lot of people). Also, it depends on your environment. Not sure where you are in school (assume you are a student), but D2 and I recently visited a highly ranked college where it seemed like the students were very self centered. D was not comfortable with that atmosphere, and doesn’t plan to apply there.</p>
<p>Agree with HiMom that looking for clubs or organizations at your college where volunteering is a focus is a good starting point.</p>
<p>Yes, I do like most people.</p>
<p>Even if I don’t like them, I almost always learn something from them.</p>
<p>I tend to find something to like in almost everyone. And even the ones I don’t “like” per se, I tend to find interesting. Yes, all in all, with the rare exception, all the people I meet add something new or interesting into my life.</p>
<p>^^^^^Agree with poetgrl. This isn’t to say that I would want to take a cross-country road trip with most people, have them as roommates, or as significant others!</p>
<p>I like about 30% of the people I meet.
I am neutral about another 60%.
The remaining 10%, I don’t like.</p>
<p>However, if the question is do I think most people are nice people?
Overwhelmingly I would say yes. I consider about 99% of the people I meet to be “nice” people.</p>
<p>Isn’t this related to how you feel about yourself and how your day is going? I know when I’m having a tough day, nothing is good and I’d rather not have anything to do with most people. If it’s a good day, I like everyone.</p>
<p>Maybe I’m one of those people who is totally about myself.</p>
<p>I keep coming back to this thread. It’s an interesting question. I’m basically an optimist, and I tend to like people until they give me a reason not to. But, really, I can’t say that I like or don’t like most people I come in contact with day to day, because they just aren’t “important” enough to merit real thought on the matter. The lady in the grocery store who has her cart parked right in the middle of the aisle and no one can get around her? Grrrr. But I neither like nor don’t like her; she’s just an inconvenience. Does that make sense?</p>
<p>I will say there are people on cc who rub me the wrong way, so I suppose I don’t “like” them, but we’re posting on the same website so I just deal.</p>
<p>I only spend time with people I like at this point. And it seems I like a lot of people. OP, if your friends aren’t caring, I think you need to find new friends.</p>
<p>I am neutral about most, like a good portion and try to avoid those that grate. But, I think your issue is you feel you give more than you get. I think you need to stop keeping score and not worry about what others do. Just be the best person you can, and in the end you will come out ahead. You can’t control what others do or don’t do, so let it go and I promise good things will come your way.</p>
<p>I pretty much like everyone until/unless they give me reason not to. I find that very few do that. My % distribution is probably a lot like vicariousparent’s. I am just, for the sake of this discussion, putting the big “neutral” block in the “like” category. But, let’s face it, there are only so many people you can actually get to know better and start to develop a friendship with.</p>
<p>The very wise Randy Pausch once said (and I’m sure he said it better than I am about to)…that there is something good in everybody. And that if you don’t see it, you just need to wait longer and spend more time and you will find what that good thing is. A beautiful philosophy.</p>
<p>It is easy to like people if you don’t have to live with them. . .</p>
<p>Charles M. Schultz (Peanuts cartoonist) wrote, “I love mankind. It’s people I can’t stand.” I sort of agree with this. It’s a lot easier to love people in theory, as a group, than as the terribly flawed individuals we all are. </p>
<p>Most people can tell pretty quickly if they have something in common with someone they meet or if they are interested in spending more time getting to know each other better. I’m in a situation where I have very little in common with most people I meet or deal with on a daily basis. I can tell that they have little interest in me (other than superficial exchanges). It is not that they are into themselves, but they can see that I’m not really their “type.” Because of this, I sometimes feel that I’m not such a likable person. I really have to go out of my way to seek out others that I have more in common with. I’ve moved many times, so it is hard to maintain friendships and family relationships-- and to make new friends as a middle-aged person.</p>
<p>A lot of people today are so stressed-out by overcrowded schedules that they don’t seem to value long-term, deep friendships. A lot of people seem to be “users”–their relationships are based on what they can get out of them. If you are not “useful” (can’t provide any goods or services or connections, etc.) they’re not going to waste their time on you. Sad to say, I have a twin sister like this–she literally never calls. If I call her every two months or so, she doesn’t have time, too busy to talk. It is impossible to maintain a relationship with someone who doesn’t have room for you in his/her life 
The modern lifestyle is such that we don’t even have to talk to our next door neighbors.</p>
<p>I like to think of people as “entertaining.” Even people you dislike can be fascinating–full of interesting stories and bad examples!</p>
<p>No. I wish I did, but no.</p>
<p>At the moment, I especially dislike the jackass at the motel where I’m staying for my daughter’s graduation who mis-scheduled my wake-up call this morning for 5 a.m. instead of 7 a.m.</p>
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<p>I think that is great advice and the OP would do well to heed it.</p>
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<p>When I hit forty, it coincided with my husband’s promotion to a rank where he could retire from the Army, and I decided that I would no longer do things that were expected, which included being around people I wasn’t crazy about. That was very freeing. </p>
<p>I would say, as someone else did, that I like most, am neutral on some, and dislike a few. But I give 0% of my time to people I do not like. I am sure they appreciate my efforts. ;)</p>
<p>I do like most people I meet, and I admire them for being more likeable than I am. I identify with atomom’s post above. One of the problems I encounter is that people are very busy (apparently busier than I am) and have little time to spare for friendship. Their families, both nuclear and extended, occupy them as do the relationships that provide a current benefit of some kind. I am friendly, outgoing, loyal, and I offer help to my friends whenever there’s a need I’m aware of, but I think I lack enough social capital to appeal to many people. One thing I also lack is money for expensive entertainment. So I guess I’d say that I dislike one thing in a lot of people, and that is they can’t seem to find a way to enjoy simple things like sharing coffee at someone’s house, chatting on the phone while doing housework each in our own homes, or taking a walk together in a pretty spot. No, it has to be going out to dinner and then to the $45 dollar local theater for a play. Or if they do plan a simple outing like awalk, they just have to go out for breakfast afterward.</p>
<p>PS–And I guess I’d add to the social capital comment that I also dislike in people their tendency to write me off because I’m a stay-at-home mom, without even getting to know me.</p>
<p>Most of the people I know are really good people. That doesn’t mean they are without flaws or annoying aspects of their personality, but to me, that is some of what differentiates people and even makes them interesting.</p>
<p>I have met only a handful of people who can be described as “making you feel like you are the only (or most important) person in the room.” They have generally been truly empathic and usually highly intelligent. Most others want to talk about themselves more than hear about you, but I accept that as the rule, and I actually find a lot of what they say to be informative and/or amusing.</p>
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<p>I agree, and it is worth noting that even WE have flaws and annoying aspects of personality. </p>
<p>Some people spend a lot of time considering the flaws of others and very little introspection is given to their own shortcomings and areas of potential improvement-that’s really a little backwards in my opinion.</p>
<p>If you are working on yourself, becoming a better person, overcoming your own flaws, thinking about how to be a better friend, mother, wife, etc., then you actually have very little time to worry about how other people are falling short. Really cuts down on the score keeping.</p>
<p>I used to think first impressions were always right, so if I didn’t click with someone when I first met them (I think that’s what you’re talking about – liking or not liking people you’ve just met), I thought that meant we would not become friends.</p>
<p>Now this is what I think: a first positive impression is, for me, always a good sign, but a first negative impression is often wrong. Maybe that person is having a bad day, maybe I’m having a bad day, maybe what I said came out wrong, etc. So if I “don’t like” someone I’ve just met, I don’t really register that response – I kind of shrug it off and see how I feel next time I see them, and the next time, and so on.</p>
<p>When D was in 4th grade, she came home with the food pyramid. I think friends are like that – you can’t be with all your friends the same amount of time. You have your core group of good friends who you can be yourself with and say anything and they’re still your friends – they’re at the base of the pyramid. You can have 6-8 servings of them a day. Next row up are the people you’re a little more careful with, but they’re still good friends. At the tippy top are people who are great fun, sometimes, but they’re like fats, oils, sweets – use sparingly.</p>