<p>I like the food pyramid analogy. I guess I am the opposite of Charles Schultz. I often can’t stand mankind but I am okay with people.</p>
<p>GFG: You and I need to take a walk. And there will be NO breakfast afterward. :)</p>
<p>What an interesting question, OP.</p>
<p>I find that people with varied life experiences are the most likable. People who have never seen or done anything outside of their tiny sphere tend to be self-centered and intolerant, perhaps because they feel that they know everything (and in fact they do, if “everything” is defined as “everything they know of”). This applies equally to rich and poor, educated and uneducated.</p>
<p>But people who have chosen or been forced to experience a variety of things seem to have learned that there is always more to know, more to see, more than one perspective, and so they tend to be slower to judge and quicker to explore, or at least tolerate, people’s differences. That is, to me, the hallmark of a likable person.</p>
<p>To be clear, education does not necessarily lead to wider experience and therefore greater likability according to my standard. One of the most insufferable people I know has a PhD, is the child of parents with PhDs, and has never experienced one thing outside of academia. She is as narrow-minded and judgmental in her own way as any grade-school-dropout Klansman. Conversely, I know a few guys with only high-school diplomas who work with their hands, who have moved around the country or even the world, tried new things, and are as enjoyable to be around as anyone I know.</p>
<p>That being said, here’s roughly how the population breaks down for me:</p>
<p>Can’t stand 'em: 5%
Can get along with 'em when necessary: 90%
Love 'em: 5%</p>
<p>Just my thoughts. Your mileage may vary.</p>
<p>I generally like people, find them entertaining and enjoy diversity, but if you are looking to see what I can provide for you then, no I don’t like you. I like those who are genuine and upfront. I have a lot of respect for that. Once you reveal who you really are to me and it is false, then I want nothing to do with you. I am loyal,kind and will do whatever needs to be done if you need help. Sometimes if you don’t go along with the game, or cannot give them something they want, they drop you, so I am leary of new frienships. Sometimes that can be isolating, but I rather be alone than be in a toxic friendship.</p>
<p>Love your answer mantori…It’s reassuring to hear that you too love only 5% of people. I felt that because I don’t really like most that there was something wrong with me!</p>
<p>This is such an interesting thread- I like the question and the answers. </p>
<p>I tend to like most people I meet, and can actually enjoy almost any group of people I encounter for short spells (e.g. meet people at say a resort, or invited to join a group from one old friend, that ends up composed of people I have little in common with). But the ‘short spells’ is probably key for me and it only works because I find people really interesting. </p>
<p>Then once I know people, I tend to see their flaws and this is one of my serious flaws and I soooo wish I wasn’t that kind of person :(. On the plus side, I guess, I am pretty good at compartmentalizing though so even if they have some aspect that drives me nuts at times, or have a side that I really disrespect, I can often like other aspects of them or forget about their negative side while I enjoy their good parts. People are ‘package deals’ and we are all flawed I guess (not that those flaws don’t drive me nuts sometimes, but rather I accept the ‘package deal’ most of the time). This helps a lot when I have to work with people or share other interdependencies and don’t have a lot of choice in the matter.</p>
<p>Then there are friends who I see, I enjoy their company, but I don’t get particularly close to them. It’s like we have some things in common but it lacks the closeness I would like. I might see them once every month or six, but we are so busy and at best we just ‘catch up’ and there isn’t a lot of depth to it and I’m not sure we miss each other, if you know what I mean. </p>
<p>I have just four really close friends besides my spouse. People I can count on through thick and thin (who I could call at 2am in a hypothetical crisis and for whom I would fly to the other side of the world if they needed me), who I feel a kindred spirit, who I can really be myself with (the good, the bad and the ugly, lol), and we ‘get’ each other. People I really miss. And the very sad part is they all live very very far away, but we communicate on email and try to see each other a few times a year. </p>
<p>I wish I had friends like these few close ones living where I live. Indeed, I long for it and feel lonely without such friendship nearby. But I find such friends are hard to find or develop. The ones above took a life time to find, they were found in very different places (they don’t know each other), but I would never let them go. </p>
<p>I think with age we might get better at finding the right people for us and knowing when to let go or not pursue ‘bad fits’. Life is too short, and time too precious, to waste time with faux friends (though they might be good filler until you get your real ones, make sure they don’t prevent you from finding your kindred spirits). And I think if we find ourselves running into the same ‘problem’ in people it might just be us-- how we create our social dynamics (either in how we act, or who we attract, or who we get attracted to). I’m sure we are all prone to doing this in varying degrees.</p>
<p>One other thing I will add is when I really feel bad feelings/anger/frustration towards a LOT of people, it’s usually my own mood rather than other people. Funny how on a given day everyone i run into seems cranky! 
And if these feelings persists, its a sign I’m fighting more threatening ‘inward’ feelings such as sadness (its as if anger, directed outwards, prevents one from focusing inward and feeling sad). And sometimes it helps to also try to look behind the anger and see what other emotions are there one might be feeling, such as sadness, loss, fear. Not suggesting this applies to you, but I thought I’d throw that out there.</p>
<p>Starbright–I like your response. My mother used to say “if the world’s agin you, it’s time to go take a nap”</p>
<p>I find that the more I’m around someone, the more I like them. College roommates, neighbors, co-workers I deal the most with, etc. </p>
<p>Guess that gets back to not always trusting that first impression. </p>
<p>But, there are certainly those who, even after getting to know them, I’d prefer not to be in their company. Ha.</p>
<p>Someone should start another thread:</p>
<p>“Do you like most posters?”</p>
<p>;)</p>
<p>^ Too funny! Go ahead, I dare you!</p>
<p>^ Maybe I should. I’d surely get banned for life for violation of Terms of Service, and I would be forcibly cured of my CC addiction!</p>
<p>I would say that I like most people in general.</p>
<p>I like most people in general, too. It’s the specifics I can’t stand. :D</p>
<p>Yes We can be so different and interesting!</p>
<p>Its nice to be at the stage in life where I don’t have to be with other people if I don’t want to be. (like other class parents,etc) Those parent breakfasts were the pits!! I’m sometimes disappointed by the people I meet around town. my husband says,“people will never be like the ones you met in college!” I think he’s right!</p>
<p>“I tend to like most people I meet, and can actually enjoy almost any group of people I encounter for short spells (e.g. meet people at say a resort, or invited to join a group from one old friend, that ends up composed of people I have little in common with). But the ‘short spells’ is probably key for me and it only works because I find people really interesting.”</p>
<p>I feel this way as well. Where Starbright and I diverge, is that I accept that all individuals have flaws. Though the years I’ve leaned how to make accommodation for that. Flaws? Not a surprise … not a problem. The people I have most trouble with are those that behave as if their opinions are invariably correct.</p>
<p>I agree newhope, and I also can take people for who they are and respect our differences, but it DRIVES ME CRAZY MAD when people act as though they have a right to criticize and be hurtful to others!! Nobody has that right and I wish those critical types could be put in their place but I for one don’t want to be on the receiving end of their wrath!!!</p>
<p>I really like genuine people who let themselves be known. Flaws and hang-ups don’t bother me if I know what they are, because that allows me to make adjustments and tiptoe around potential problem areas. Suppose I’m aware that a certain person is big on reciprocity. Well, then I know if she sends a graduation card to my kid (thinking about that other thread as an example), I absolutely cannot fail to send one to hers (not that I wouldn’t want to anyway, but I know I can’t forget or be late about doing it.) But I find it hard to be around people who are like hidden land mines, in that some seemingly trivial happening, innocuous incident, or random comment can set them off and then you don’t know what hit you!</p>
<p>away2school–</p>
<p>The older I get, the less I care about other people’s opinions. I mean, literally, I don’t care in the slightest. </p>
<p>I think it’s the best thing about being in my forties. One day, I just woke up and I didn’t care what other people thought of me or the way I live my life. Very freeing. Also, the flip-side, I don’t have a lot of opinions about other people or their lives, anymore, either. also very freeing. :)</p>
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<p>I’m not sure we diverge newhope. As I’d written, I accept people are package deals (with flaws and all). I was just admitting that I notice people’s flaws and some drive me nuts (sounds like some drive you nuts too…like those who feel their opinions are invariably correct…people like me for example!..though don’t most people think their opinions are correct? :)).</p>