<p>We have friends who like to visit with their dogs. My son is allergic (he doesn’t live at home now, but visits) and I’ve started to be reactive. I get congested and feel like I have a hair in my throat. The dogs also fight in the house, poop and pee in the house and take out our screens. These are dear friends, but I have to remind them to take their dogs outside. Like, how many hours should you expect your dogs to be inside? I hate to say that they can’t bring their dogs, but…</p>
<p>Tell them they cannot bring there dogs when they visit. I have three dogs and wouldn’t think of bringing them with me to someone’s home.</p>
<p>I agree with emilybee.</p>
<p>On the VERY rare occasions it’s been necessary (like, we’re trying to sell our house and there’s a showing), I would always ask first. There are some friends I can do that with – we share pet responsibilities – but in general, I’d never bring my dogs with me on a social occasion.</p>
<p>You are a saint for allowing this in the past - maybe a fool!!! :)</p>
<p>Shame on your friends for putting you through this - really, I can’t imagine being in your shoes or theirs! </p>
<p>As far as indoor/outdoor time it really varies from family to family. Is the dog used to being outside at it’s home??? How’s the weather? Do you have a fenced in yard for safety (for others and for the dog) or a deck where it can be on a long leash of sorts? </p>
<p>This time of year where the temp is near or below freezing our dog doesn’t spend a lot of time outside at all besides his daily walks (total walking time about 45-60 mins a day). In the nice weather we put him out for an hour or so at a time unless we are also out in the yard doing work - then he is happy to be out with us. </p>
<p>But I do know/see other dogs who are out this time of the year for a couple of hours at a time if it is not a severe weather day. </p>
<p>I think it depends on what the dog is used to at home.</p>
<p>They do ask first and I’ve said yes, but it’s getting more unpleasant, I feel sick and I’m concerned about being able to remove the hair and dander before my son visits. When it was one dog, that was easier, but now it’s up to 3 dogs and it feels so excessive. We love these people, but a weekend with indoor dog fights, etc. is…</p>
<p>abasket–we live in a rural area, but no fencing, so if they let their dogs out, they can disappear. They really need to walk them on a leash here. Once a day is not enough. It’s cold here, but when we had a dog, he needed to go out more than once a day.</p>
<p>If they ask first, that’s very considerate of them. Then it’s not at all out of line for you to say no.</p>
<p>Walks seem to definitely be good for behavior management in dogs - expends energy, promotes resting - really just the same as children (and adults!!)</p>
<p>You have good reason between your son’s allergies and your health concerns to say no. If you are considering this, just give them plenty of time to think of another solution. </p>
<p>I really can’t fathom counting on any friend or family to accommodate my THREE dogs if I had them!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Seriously? You put up with that??</p>
<p>We take our dog to visit friends and relatives, even when we travel. But our dog is perfect.</p>
<p>I’ve let certain people bring certain dog and absolutely banned certain people from bring any dogs. Funny thing, the folks with misbehaved dogs also have misbehaved kids and their response to both is the same…oh isn’t that cute …or…they never do that at home. (oh how I wish I could ban the kids).</p>
<p>If allergies are an issue then it is completely reasonable to ban animals from your home. In this case it could be a gracious excuse and the OP wouldn’t have to directly confront the doggie doodoo owners with the obvious. </p>
<p>In the end…there are no bad doggies, only bad owners.</p>
<p>Bethie, i am extremely allergic to dogs and my friends are all aware. I get very sick even with taking medicine when I’m at friends houses. If they are visiting they try to find a different place for their dogs to stay. On a few occasions my best friend has had to bring her dog over. We chain her outside to my patio with enough rope that she can run around the yard but not into the street. </p>
<p>We bring her in over night and if its raining or really cold. When she comes in we leave her in the kitchen with a baby gate up. That way i can clean the floors and not have to worry about dog on my furniture or area rugs. Even with her out there i take medicine the day before the day of and the day after.</p>
<p>Hope this helps.</p>
<p>Sent from my DROID BIONIC using CC</p>
<p>Friends with dogs always bring them to our family home, but only because they know that we are very much dog people (even if we don’t actually have dogs of our own any more - we still love the animals!). There are still limits though…</p>
<p>It’s very inconsiderate of them to bring them when they know about the allergies, and how poorly trained the dogs are. I’d suggest telling them that as a result of your allergy, your Dr has told you to avoid all contact with dogs, lest you go into anaphylactic shock…</p>
<p>Oddly, these friends were strict disciplinarians with their kids, but let their dogs slide.</p>
<p>fendergirl–the kitchen suggestion sounds good, though we’d need 2 baby gates. Most of the year it’s too cold here to leave anyone outside.</p>
<p>boomting–I do need to get tougher. I’ve told them about my son’s allergies several times and they still wonder why we don’t want a dog of our own. These are smart people in other ways, but blind about dogs.</p>
<p>We have 4 dogs, and whenever we go visit a relative we ask, with the expectation of a relative who allows it. The one time we had to take our 3 dogs to a relative’s house who normally would not allow animals in, but we had no choice because our grandmother’s pet had a stroke on Christmas day. They were not going to be home (emergency vet all day) so we couldn’t just leave the dogs like normal. I made sure to take them out every hour, I kept the dogs on leashes in the house, warned any relative of the oldest dog who is grumpy, gave them water outside, and we left early.</p>
<p>I would flat out tell them not bring the dogs, and they should understand. If they don’t understand maybe you should visit them at their house if it’s possible. I now keep belly bands on my dogs when we go visit because I don’t know what type of scents they will have in the house. Another relatives dog peed all over their house so our dogs would want to mark by it. Depending on their dogs perhaps a belly band (males), or a potty pad would be what they need if you do allow them back. We put the senior citizen pads on the inside of our belly bands so we don’t have to wash them every week. </p>
<p>As for going outside. I keep a coat on my dogs as they are all under 20lbs since it is normally 20 or below here for winter. I also have them on tie outs to keep them on, until I get my father to build a fence, we just keep the tie outs on a stake in the ground. Perhaps they should bring that with them, and to keep them from freezing we keep the one end in the house.</p>
<p>bethie: the next time a visit is discussed just tell these friends firmly that you have developed an allergy to dogs and your dr. recommends no dogs in the house at all. (Go visit the dr. and get some allergy meds if you want to be scrupulously honest.) Then you will have to stick to this. It’s all true and you and your sons shouldn’t have dogs in your house at all if it makes you sick.</p>
<p>Your friends are very inconsiderate and not really very good friends to let their dogs act up at your house. But nevertheless, just be bold: medical issue, no more dogs in house.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I am a total dog lover, but I find this astonishing. </p>
<p>A person who genuinely loves dogs trains them. I simply cannot imagine allowing this to go on in my own house, much less a friend’s house.</p>
<p>Since you have developed an allergy, the next time the question arises you should simply tell them that alas, you have apparently developed an allergy like your son’s and you can no longer allow dogs in your house. Sorry. You could go on a bit about how people do apparently develop allergies as they age, and isn’t it a shame. End of story.</p>
<p>Goodness, those dog owners are not doing a very good job with their pets and not being a very good friend to you! Allergies are something that can develop over time so now is the time to say you’ve developed this allergy so the dogs can no longer come over. It this day and time there are many wonderful kennels and doggie day care places which will spoil their pooches while you enjoy your visit!</p>
<p>fumafoo–I think a lot of the problem would be solved if they took the dogs out often enough. I even suggested it at one point but they said the dogs would bark if they needed to go out. Then one of them started barking, but they still didn’t take her out.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>No, you’re beating around the bush. You’re hoping that they hear your son has allergies and they come up with “oh, I guess I should leave my dogs at home” on their own, instead of stepping up to the plate and saying, “I’m sorry. We really need you to keep your dogs at home.” </p>
<p>It’s passive on your part as well to make all these excuses - well, if they just took their dogs out, blah blah blah. This is your house. You set the rules. </p>
<p>I am a dog lover, but I am allergic to cats, and there is simply no way a cat would be allowed in my house. It’s just not right. People’s health and comfort come before animals. </p>
<p>You know what the solution is, but you seem to need some courage in asking for it. What can we do to help you gain the courage? It’s not unreasonable at all for any homeowner to say, no, I don’t want guest dogs in my house. My IL’s have dogs but I don’t bring my dog over there without asking - and if they don’t want to deal with an extra dog that day, they are perfectly within their rights to tell me no. They don’t need an excuse, and neither do you.</p>
<p>well, pizzagirl, I am a people pleasing, passive pushover, which is why I came here to get reinforced for the thought of saying no.</p>
<p>Consider yourself reinforced! :)</p>