Dad retired in 2007. He also had three other kids who went to college (o went to a community college), so I think he might’ve used his GI benefits on one of my step brothers
Dad went to college at the Air Force Academy for undergrad, Webster for MBA
Call him NOW and ask. You really need to move quickly.
@eandesmom Thank you for your advice as well your understanding the pressure to leave (Hawaii suffers from the “brain drain” phenomenon). I will consider the gap year more but adjusting my parents to that idea will be difficult because they fully expect that I will not be living with them in September.
I will text my dad since I’m in school right now and I don’t think he will pick up
Considering that you have been shut out financially, which is the least bad from a tiger parent’s point of view?
- Gap year (probably working), apply to a merit seeking list next time.
- Attend UH (or community college and transfer to UH).
- Attend UAH.
You may have to sell your parents on the idea of a gap year and the benefits of starting over again with a new, application list targeted at big merit awards (this forum will help you!!!).
It’s possible your parents are unaware of the full tuition or full tuition plus scholarships within your reach at good schools that will get you to your career goals.
Kids take gap years for all sorts of reasons. We know someone who took one, worked, and did an amazing internship for two months in South America. Maybe your parents would be willing to fund some sort of gap year short program.
We are also in a financial situation where we cannot afford our EFC. LOTS of families are in this exact same boat. Our youngest was so mad at us! She could not accept our limited budget. She wanted us to borrow, or “let her borrow” +$120K so she could attend a prestigious school. It was a tough week, with emotions running very high.
In the end, of the affordable options, she had two full tuition offers and one full ride offer on the table. She’s now at the school that gave her the full ride, making friends & doing well, and we can all BREATHE because we are not buried in debt.
All of that angst and disappointment and what ifs from last year is in the rearview mirror. It wasn’t that long ago, if you count the months, but it is so “last year”. We’ve moved on. You will too!
You might want to encourage your parents to take a long term view. It may seem, in the short term, that you’d be wasting a year and falling behind by taking a gap year. In fact, you’re putting yourself in a better position to succeed, and you’re preventing your family from getting into an unfortunate financial position. If you can find something to do during the gap year that enhances your resume, builds your bank account and/or helps you decide what you want to do long term, so much the better.
Probably the most common type of gap year is paid work.
@jql2017 on the flip side, as someone who tries desperately to find talent to hire in Hawaii, that actually understand the culture (as there is a cultural freeze as you know for anyone from the mainland) it is actually full of opportunities for talented young professionals with local roots and connections.
Did either of you research local scholarships? With stats like yours there may have been some to aid in year one, though it’s getting late in the game for those.
I do very much get it (the brain drain) though which is why a gap year will serve your end game best without ruining your parents future. That is a very hard dynamic to push back against. But truly UH is not that bad, despite its local rap. Versus not going to college or bankrupting a family, it most certainly beats the alternative. It could also be an affordable option for 2 years to then transfer out of, live at home and save as much as you can for the transfer option.
Does UH have an honors college, anything that might make it palatable to all of you?
I also hope that your sister and you can be aligned in this, whatever path you go down as the potential for damaged relationships all around seems high. I am so sorry and sending you some needed Aloha to help you work through this.
UH has a sort of Honors College. Alas, it’s not up to the level of most other flagships’: no test score or EC requirement, it’s open to anyone with a 3.5 high school GPA (with a “rigorous” to “very rigorous” but not “most rigorous” curriculum). It targets students in the 25-29 ACT range. I really don’t think UH would be a good choice for a student who got a 32+ ACT. NACAC list would be a possible alternative, gap year would be a possible alternative but UH would be my last choice - perhaps apply now, but keep it on the side in case the NACAC list applications don’t yield affordable results and the parents are closed to the idea of a gap year.
Yes I did send an application to the Hawaii community foundation which includes 200 scholarships but I will not hear back from those until late may at the earliest. I’m also still applying for scholarships that are not need based (most of those are judge by essay not stats though)
It is hard to understand the college dynamic in Hawaii. Like I mentioned earlier most kids who go to top schools are from private schools, but mostly from the biggest top three (Punahou, Iolani, Kamehameha). Even the smarter bunch of the public school kids mostly leave the island for college. Public ed is terrible here. My high school sends less than 50% of graduates to college/post secondary ed. 30% AP/IB/Running Start enrollment. Only 80ish% graduation rate. Friends who have much lower stats are still heading to USF, univ. of pacific, western Oregon, lower ranked UC schools even though staying here would be much cheaper for anyone. If there is a chance to leave people will take it even at a college equal to UH in academics and opportunities. And my 34 ACT was the highest test score for my school. I am 3rd in GPA bc 1st and 2nd place played the GPA system by dropping all non weighted classes and only taking APs while my IB curriculum is made up of HL (weighted) and SL (non weighted) classes.
UH is good for marine biology (obviously, we are on an island) and nursing but not for much else. Not sure about honors programs but I guess now is time to research.
Also I just spoke with my college counselor during lunch. She said I should definitely still go to the accepted student receptions for Cal and UW this Sunday to ask about financial aid I really doubt I will get anything out of that but I didn’t have plans so I guess I will go for fun haha. She also recommended how to go about appealing for Rochester (said I should mention we are his 4th and 5th kids to go through college and also find out what net salary is opposed to gross salary) since she said that is the one I’m most likely to get more money out of.
Presumably, they either had parents able and willing to pay, or they chose schools where they got large scholarships or WUE discounts to make the price more affordable.
I have a classmate who got accepted to UC Davis and USF, but she can’t decide. This baffles me but apparently she plans on making deposits to both schools in order to get more time to decide. Her parents would have to take out 45k per year loan to afford either school as well but they will do it because everyone wants to leave
Nobody stays here if they can help it. Parents who have less stable jobs and make less money will max out loans to send their kids off island.
2deposits is a big no-no.
Oddly enough, UAH’s website has a news story about how UH asked UAH for help in setting up a cyber security program.
This is a tangent but that classmate already visited both schools so I don’t understand how she thinks more time and a second visit to both schools will help at all. Oh well if her parents let her I guess more power to her
You and your sister each need your OWN non-custodial parent waiver form because you each have your own file at the colleges. That is why Rochester needs two…one for each of you.
Your college files will NEVER be merged.
Your guidance counselor should know you can’t ask for money from public universities in states you’re not a resident of… And that UC’s announced last year they would no longer offer any financial aid whatsoever to oos applicants. A
I realized our files are separate but it’s just weird since they were faxed together, at the same time
And yeah I don’t think I will get money from public universities and she told me I mostly likely won’t but still wants me to go to the receptions. I think I am the only student from my school who got into berkeley, which is a nice accomplishment if that’s worth anything haha
Berkeley has accepted you as a full pay OOS student. It is worth something to Cali to have high stats kids who are prepared to pay full freight. Your mother might listen if you tell her that your family is a nice cash cow for a cali uni. I bet she is way savvier than you are painting her. I think your parents are waiting for the dust to settle.