Whenever I feel a twinge of regret about getting rid of my albums, I remember lugging them around, cleaning them so they would stay in good condition, and finding space for them. Freedom!
Shellfell- my H doesn’t even listen to music except for iPod shuffle I programmed for him! It’s a complete waste of space!
@thumper1 did someone say signed Danish Modern? It brings some serious money here in California. More than you can imagine.
We did a "grand purge’ 18 months ago. Some of the mid century modern reproductions that I had bought from DWR a seven years back sold on Craigslist for what I paid for them. Granted they were from Herman Miller, but I was shocked.
And no. I could not get H to part with a single album.That’s another battle for another time.
The estate executor can sell it to whomever they want to, unless other instructions are specifically left in the will. But they have to sell it for something resembling fair market value – unless the heirs all agree to something else.
This isn’t quite downsizing, but similar. When my husband moved into my house, he refused to get rid of any of his daughter’s toys. He still had her tricycle and her little plastic kitchen, and she was 8. He even brought her small swing set thing when I already had a bigger one. He paid movers to move much of this stuff. EVENTUALLY he took pictures of most of the stuff and got rid of it. We still have way too many kid things here, but occasionally we do another round of dumping.
I get sentimental about my kids stuff too. They are 17 and 20. I still have a few toys (not many) and going to thin those out some more.
OK, I empathize with him because that’s the biggest problem for me. I cannot bear to part with my boys’ stuff. When we remodeled our house 5 years ago I literally started bawling as we were cleaning up the back porch where we had everything stacked. My husband thought I was off my rocker.
It’s not the stuff, it’s the memories. The hopes and dreams. I can remember the Christmas mornings when the stuff was all new and the kids were so happy. It’s hard to let that go. It does help me to take pictures.
I’m trying to get more zen.
How can they sell it when they die? Their will clearly states that all real estate AND the furniture in their house will be sold, and the money added to their estate. Most of the estate money (if there is any left) will go into a trust to help pay for a piece of real estate they trusted to their kids (except us…we declined to be part of it).
So if we want the couch…we will have to buy it. Not going to happen. It’s worth about $10,000…no kidding.
Wow Thumper. Are you out of the will since you declined the real estate trust? Would they/the other sibs consider gifting you/your H the couch?
No one in the family will be getting that couch. The inlaws have specifically stipulated that it will be sold when they die. If we want it, we have to put in a purchase request with the executor. I know that would be honored, but I’m not paying $10,000 for it!
Again…the couch is NOT being given to anyone in the family…it will be sold per the inlaws will.
But isn’t that crazy!
We did it last year and are still adjusting. Love the new place and are happy with the decision. I did have to rethink a lot in terms of setting up the new place. Finally I realized that I was basically trying to reset everything up in a similar way and that I would instead have to change it up to make things work. So kitchen, laundry, pantry etc, they are all set up a lot differently and now I’m used to them. Good luck! I agree with whoever said better to do it now than when we are much older.
I am boggled by the idea of a $10,000 couch. My butt is not special enough to grace that.
My mom had a bunch of Hummels she got when we lived in Germany in the eatly 70s. Dad wants to divide them among the three of us girls. Um, no thanks. I have some other things that my parents got when we lived overseas thst have more meaning to me. And I don’t need Mom’s collection of 1500 souvenir spoons. The 25 I picked out, plus the wooden rack he made for them, is plenty.
Is .925 silverware considered sterling? I have my grandmother’s set and my MIL’s. No idea if it’s real stuff or not, other than the .925 marker and tarnish.
925 is sterling
@CountingDown - Yes, .925 is the mark of sterling silver. If you have any doubts, take a piece from each set to your local jeweler. They would be able to identify the Silversmith’s mark.
I got married in 1988 and my mother talked me into registering for sterling silver flatware, china and crystal because that’s what everyone did in her day. I really think I was the tail end of that particular tradition. My friends who got married after I did in the nineties registered for stainless as well as less formal china and crystal patterns.
I used my sterling only a few times and never after the kids arrived. We entertain several times a year but it is always on a casual basis. About 18 months ago when cleaning out cabinets, I pulled the silver chest out (really I had forgotten about it during the busy kid years) and after a little research, realized my Reed & Barton pattern had been discontinued. To add any more place settings would cost several hundred dollars a piece if I wanted to buy any on eBay. At that point I made the decision to sell my 8 place settings of sterling plus a few serving pieces to an antique dealer who had a few place settings in my pattern and was looking to build a complete set of 12+. I don’t regret it.
In case you’re looking to sell there are a number of dealers who will make you an offer based on an email description and picture. According to the dealers I spoke to, the more simple patterns are the most popular in todays market.
Same here.
Not only is my butt not special enough but any household pet isn’t going to care at all whether the couch is $100 or $10,000 - my cat would not discriminate when it came to sleeping, scratching or throwing up on said couch… 
My H and his siblings are dismayed at the amount of “stuff” their parents have and how their Mom is resistant to downsizing. The Dad would move tomorrow if he could, and is having great trouble with stairs now but the Mom is really clutching at their old house which she considers her life work.
They’re actually talking about leaving the house to their S3 and dividing the rest of things to equalize but we all think it is a way for the Mom to never have to let go of the house, to think that it will be there even after she dies, etc. It is a 4 bedroom, 2 story house with a full basement and S3 is a bachelor with no children approaching age 50. Will he want to keep all the furniture and teacups? Oyyyyyyyyy!
^^My MIL gave their huge 5 bedroom house (well, sold at a steep friends and family discount, lol) to my husband’s younger brother, and they bought a smaller lake house. She still brings stuff to the big house! So now she actually has TWO houses to fill up with crap! As Admiral Akbar says, “it’s a trap!” 
My mom worried about “stuff” going to “good homes”. H took her to the local Good Will and pointed out all the families that shop there and depend on finding nice things at prices they can afford. So as we went through the stuff we, along with her, made up the character of 12 year old “little Susie.” As in , “oh look at these baskets, little Susie would love these.” She parted with the stuff much more easily. She enjoyed the tax deduction and actually cherished the idea that someone else would love the stuff. She still mentions “little Susie” with a smile.
We had the discussion about the house going to one of my siblings a couple of years ago. My B & SIL live in my parents’ hometown, and there was a change in tax law in their state that year that would have saved the estate a bundle if they had changed the deed to them that year. My SIL put her foot down – at the time they were in their late 50s, she already had knee problems, and they owned a house with stairs (as my parents’ house has). While my parents’ house is nicer, she said it seemed silly to sign up to eventually move to another house with stairs. It did settle the issue of the house.
Re: the $10,000 couch – it is possible that in reality, it will sell for nothing like that when the time comes. Thus allowing your son to purchase it after all… just saying, he should let the executor know that he has an interest, and see what kind of actual prices seem to be at the time. People’s stuff is worth SO MUCH LESS than they think it is…
When we REALLY wanted a good home (eg, D2 downsized her stuffed owl collection of 65 down to about 20, and her one request was that they go to a “good home” all together, NOT to Goodwill) – we used Freecycle, and genuinely found a little “Suzie” who loved stuffed owls and was thrilled to take 3 shopping bags of them home for free. Now… they might be at Goodwill someday. But we didn’t send 'em there.