Wear what you wear!! And why not???
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Enjoy your dinner, deb922! Agree with ‘wear what you like and makes you feel good!’ If the other lady is not that into clothes likely she won’t even notice a style difference between you two!
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Funny fact about me… I own a LOT of leggings, but I have trouble wearing them “in public” except if I’m going grocery shopping on my way home from exercising, for example. So, I wouldn’t be dressed like the wife in this example. BUT, I would err on the side of casual and not “dressed up,” like it sounds like you are doing.
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Sounds like a great outfit and fits well into the vibe of the group. Elevated casual. Enjoy your dinner!
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I generally wear what I feel like—sometimes I’m more dressed than others, sometimes I’m more casual, while other times we happen to all be in sync. Honestly it doesn’t bother me either way.
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What you want to wear sounds more than appropriate. You both just have different definitions of casual dining attire.
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Your outfit is totally good if you are totally good wearing it!
I think the thing that matters is that (if mentioned) you make her feel comfortable wearing the things that make her feel totally good - and maybe that is leggings and her favorite tennis shoes.
I like to be casual but I also would not think twice about feeling bad about what I’m wearing our judging you wearing something different. Unless you’re like going the prom dress route! 
Have fun!
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My Rothy’s slides arrived today. Good thing I ordered 2 different sizes, because my usual 9.5 was a bit small.
Comfy. I like the glitter.
I should take the time to go through my summer shoes and shift some to our other place or donate what were mistakes and rarely worn.
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Back from dinner. I felt very cute in my outfit. I wore my new Anthropologie blouse with a navy cardigan, I thought it looked good together.
Thanks for the affirmation!
Our friend wore a white shirt with her black leggings. She always looks nice but I think she’s a minimalist and I’m not.
Had a nice time with friends we see too little of.
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They look awesome!
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@deb922 - very timely.
We traveled to my mil’s for Mother’s Day weekend. My sil lives in the same town. We arrived this afternoon with dinner reservations for tonight. I had planned to change into my new blue engineered striped outfit posted upthread. My sil came over about an hour and a half before we were heading to the restaurant for a glass of wine and apps. She had on denim clam diggers, a striped, short-sleeved shirt, and very casual sandals. Almost looked like water shoes? No jewelry, no make-up.
I decided not to change. Honestly, my travel outfit was cuter than what she was wearing. It just seemed like it would be…Idk, too much if I changed. So I didn’t. I felt like it would make her uncomfortable.
It shouldn’t matter. It’s not like I was going to see anyone I knew in mil’s town. Who am I trying to impress? But, I do enjoy dressing up (a little) to go out.
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When I’m with another friend who doesn’t dress up when we go out, I am self conscious of it. Sometimes I dress up with exactly what I want, other times I’ll tone it down. I guess it depends on how much I want to wear something.
I never dress to her casual style (non style ?) though. She needs to up HER game. She does sometimes. She wore a title nine skort!
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That outfit is adorable and I’m glad you didn’t change. Let’s all make a pact to quit doubting what to do and rethink that it’s them who need to step it up.
I have a dear friend who said this to me once when I was talking about feeling too dressed up sometimes, “it never bothers me to be the best dressed in a room.” Let that be our mantra!
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I am a minimalist and I have a friend who dresses up more than me; think spiky heels, more colorful, fitted, and probably “younger” outfits. I think she looks great and it is definitely a reflection of her personality. I prefer a plain and simple style for my personal wardrobe (not sloppy or shabby) and I certainly hope she doesn’t give a thought to what I’m wearing when she chooses her outfit. We should all dress in a way that reflects our personality and preferences.
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I don’t dress up to go out to dinner either unless it’s a special occasion. I’m fortunate to live in a mostly casual city with many outdoor eating options, which I think lends itself to a more casual dress code. That said, I wouldn’t do leggings and t-shirt except maybe to a brewery on a weekend afternoon. I mostly do a pair of jeans (no rips) and a nicer top, sweater or blazer and a cute flat or sandal. Never any heels for me.
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I think “dressing up” is relative. And “dressing casual” is relative. I don’t see anything is wrong with going to a local place for casual mexican or bar food with leggings embracing a full athleisure outfit (clean
Black leggings, over tshirt, matching jacket or 1/4 zip and not scruffy athletic shoes ) that is clean and coordinated.
Dress how you like! Let others do the same. Otherwise you may be “dressing stuffy” - which maybe is a sign of acting old!!!
I honestly am paying little attention to what people are wearing in a restaurant. I’d be more interested to see people just having a nice time out and a smile on their face and laughter at their table.
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I might have been unclear. I did NOT change into the outfit I planned to wear, which was the matching navy and white engineered striped jacket and cropped pants. I don’t consider that a dressy outfit at all, but it was definitely dressier than what my sil was wearing when she arrived at mil’s house before we headed to the restaurant. We were hanging out at mil’s home for an hour before we went to the restaurant.
So, I just stayed in my skinny jeans, striped T-shirt, black linen Tommy Bahama jacket, and flat sandals I had traveled in. That was still dressier than what sil was wearing.
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But, what sometimes happens (at least to me) is that I get comments about how I’m dressed if I am dressier.
“Why are you so dressed up?” It comes across as being critical. I don’t know how to respond to that.
I don’t ever say, “Why aren’t you more dressed up?” to someone.
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I agree.
This type of put-together athleisure outfit would be fine at most places in my town (during the day) and is actually what most women are wearing.
I don’t think anyone’s judging - we’re just talking about how we like to dress for different situations. I envy people who are confident and unapologetic about their style choices, whatever they may be, while I agonize endlessly over mine and am still second-guessing even after I leave the house 
I’m a people-watcher so I’m always noticing what the latest clothing styles and colors are, what shoes people are wearing, handbags they’re carrying, how they are wearing their hair, etc. I also love giving compliments when I see a look I like 
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I understand what you are saying. And that would be sort of putting you on the spot which is unfair. Because you are doing your comfort level level of dress.
You should be comfortable saying something like “you know, I love shopping and I LOVE spending time getting ready for an outing and wearing my wardrobe. It makes me happy!”
I think this is more about acceptance. Accepting people where they are and putting more weight on who they are than what they are wearing. For some people clothes are just a vehicle to not be naked. . Just like for some people home decorating is a struggle or not important! (I’m a good case in point. I like to look nice but I put WAY more value and importance in my life on how my house looks than how I look. I’ll look fine but I would much rather spend $$$ on a great piece for my home than a great piece for my closet).
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