<p>Reading all these posts has been comforting for me, mother of an emotionally remote D. (And yes, she’s a STEM major) She does call us, but getting her to engage in a satisfying conversation can be like pulling teeth. I generally have to ask all the questions, and her responses are terse. Sometimes, she will ask what’s going on with us, but seldom will use our response as a springboard for further conversation. </p>
<pre><code> Surprisingly, she joined a sorority and so we know she is capable of engaging in small talk. But I think it’s hard for her, and I guess when she’s with her family she wants to just relax and not have to worry about making conversation. She has never been comfortable with physical displays of affection. The closest she would come to that when she was a child was playing with my hair. Although she’s a very pretty girl, she has never had a boyfriend (and she’s a senior in college). So, I worry about her.
But every once in a while, she’ll do something that lets me know there’s a beating heart inside. For example, she knew that H had been out of town since last Saturday and she called tonight and said, “Mom, are you feeling lonely at home without Dad?” For most other parents, that would be no big deal. But for those of us with children who seldom display empathy, a call like that is a real gift
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