Same here–I love taking care of newborns. I hope I get some grandchildren before I’m too old to help!
I don’t like the newborn/baby stage. There, I’ve said it. I also had complications, premature twins and a nice case of PPD. Oh - and I had both types of deliveries, 2 hours apart! Lucky me.
^^ geez, my twins were 1/2 hour apart, I thought that was pretty extreme!
Oldmom, your story brought tears to my eyes. How lovely that you found each other.
@mom2collegekids …same with my step MIL. She was the oldest of 10 kids, her Mom was kind of lazy, and MILTook care of her siblings. She said she was never so happy to marry at 16, had her first at 17 and said it was a piece of cake staying home taking care of one little baby.
@ Cajun…I had to laugh about the umbrella strollers. After lugging around the collapsible ones,mthose seemed awesome. I had a double stroller I used for just a little while,math at was a behemoth.
@MaineLonghorn …my MIL did the same for me with DS2. She was so afraid I would get PPD again, that she stayed for 10 days and got up with the baby every single night and let me sleep. That was just incredible. I remember the hospital called after 4 days to check up on me to ask his I was doing and how many hours a night average I was sleeping. I sheepishly said, um 8 hours. I need to call my MIL today after remembering this…just to chat.
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@mom2collegekids …same with my step MIL. She was the oldest of 10 kids, her Mom was kind of lazy, and MILTook care of her siblings. She said she was never so happy to marry at 16, had her first at 17 and said it was a piece of cake staying home taking care of one little baby.
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my mom was never the least bit lazy, but she wanted us to know how to take care of babies. When my youngest brother was born, I was 11. Once my mom stopped nursing him, I asked if his crib could be put in my room so that I could take care of him…so they did. He was also my Godchild so it just seemed right that I help more with him. I loved it. …and it was that brother’s baby’s diaper that my son changed…so the cycle continues…lol
^"^ geez, my twins were 1/2 hour apart, I thought that was pretty extreme!"
Ha! They were born at 8 pm and 10 pm and in between I remember looking up at a wall clock and deliriously thinking - that must be some kind of gauge (I was in the OR), that can’t possibly really be the time. I was kind of out of it but it was roughest on our collected relatives in the other room, who saw H emerge with the “it’s a boy!” for the first and then went dark for 2 hours when they would have expected a rapid update on #2.
And it only complicated things that H (and my FIL) are both ob-gyns and it was their third partner who was my delivering doc. I had some uncommon complications and it was a very hard situation for H because it was hard for me to “let” him just play the role of H when I also desperately wanted and trusted his medical reassurance and management. Thankfully he and his partner fully agreed on how to manage my case.
@oldmom4896 , thanks for the reminder that we all have our new mother experiences, whether by birth or adoption 
S1 was a gorgeous baby. But not so for S2-- he was a looong skinny, plucked chicken w swollen eyes. When the doctor delivered him and exclaimed, “it’s a boy; he’s beautiful!” I was thinking, “You gotta be kidding me…” @-)
Years later, grandparents & I joke that handsome S2 is Most Improved Baby.
The upside - D was a great sleeper and slept through the night at 3 weeks. I did not have PPD, in fact I was almost the opposite. The downside- colic. D howled nonstop from about 3PM - 9PM every day. I walked and walked with her in my arms. Probably helped take off the baby weight, but I am lucky I didn’t wear treads in my floors. After the colic stopped at 3 months, she was an easy baby.
Old mom - absolutely! I hate how families who adopt get marginalized. It’s a trend nowadays with all of the birth plan/experience nonsense. I feel sorry for the young mothers of today who are taught that how the baby is born is the important thing. That’s not what makes a mother or a family, at all.
I didn’t feel this way when H and I brought S1 home but boy did I think it when S1 and DIL were allowed to take MY grandbaby home! LOL
Thanks to those who spoke up on the marginalization of adoptive mothers. You know, I don’t even think of it that way, I was just so bowled over by how in love with my girl I was from the moment I saw her. It did take a little while to feel like a mother–like a few days to go from feeling like a babysitter to feeling like an aunt to feeling like mommy. And a week after we got home 10 days after we met, I knew that I would gladly sacrifice my life for her (but only if necessary!).
I didn’t have the sleepless nights of the parent of a newborn but I did have the full-on jetlag after a trip from China to NYC. Ugh. It was February so I couldn’t easily use the go-outside-in-the-sunlight cure and for sure she was too young to explain about time zones. I was long over it when she was still waking up at 3 a.m. thinking, naptime is over, time to play!
When I had my first, it was during the era of “drive thru deliveries”. If you had no compications, you were sent home the next day. I had him at 6 am, I was discharged by 6am the next morning. It was very scary for a 25 yr old.
So why do people need a license to get married, but anyone with an ovum or a sperm can have a kid?
A home study to adopt!
My mom came and stayed with me for a week for first kid. I resisted her company beforehand and cried when she left. She didn’t take care of the baby–she took care of ME! What a godsend. She cleaned the house, went grocery shopping, fed me, bought me some new clothes. Told me to nap. Thank goodness she was there. Every time the baby cried she’d say “she’s hungry.” and I’d say “I just fed her!” and she’d repeat “she’s hungry. trust me.” And she was right.
Second baby–so different. Bit tired but already figured on that and knew it wasn’t going to be a lifetime. Enjoyed all the moments. It was the mindset that made a huge difference and I think my body had already learned the ropes.
My mom came a few days after D1 was born, but was little help once she got home from the NICU (in for about a week with apnea issues). Went to bed in her room with the door shut at 9 pm, got up at 8 the next morning. Didn’t do laundry, cook, etc. My MIL came after that for a week, and she was AMAZING. When D1 woke up in the night, I would diaper and feed her, then my MIL would take her and tell me to go back to sleep. I didn’t always see eye to eye with my MIL (now ex-MIL, she is still lucid and kicking at 94, I still visit her in the nursing home when in town with the kids), but in this particular area, she was a saint. I have vowed that when my Ds have kids, I will take over so they can SLEEP sometimes when I am visiting. And not keep them awake when the baby is sleeping. And do laundry. And cook. 
I want to be the mom/MIL who makes things easier for them, not harder.
@Pizzagirl , funny you should mention that…I had a C-section after being in labor and not progressing. As a young mother, I subscribed to all of the baby magazines I could get my hands on. There were several articles about C-sections , some of which suggested that c-sections shouldn’t make you feel like less of a mother…never did understand that idea. I also had two more C-sections and that never made me feel inferior either
I’ve loved reading this thread. Question: They don’t do the drive thru deliveries anymore??? Thank Goodness for that. I was “lucky” with my first because he was born at 11:03 p.m on a Friday night. They let me stay until Sunday morning. I was not prepared in any way shape or form to leave. I really hope it’s changed!