Hello!
Our daughter will enter college Fall of 2026. She thinks she wants to study math and music. D’s interested in studying music as an academic subject (theory, composition, etc…), rather than performance, but would like lots of opportunities to participate in performing arts casually. Her music EC’s (private piano lessons, musical theater, choir, etc…) have been a very rewarding social outlet. While she performs at a high level in math, I would not categorize her as advanced. She is not in need of an abundance of high-level graduate math classes as an undergraduate. D is a very serious student and attends an all-girls catholic high school. She has two siblings. We live near NYC.
D’s main preferences for college are, in order, 1) a kind and friendly student body, 2) low stress (she does NOT want to be in a high stress environment), 3) close to home (~4 hr. drive). Small class size is another preference - she likes to actively participate in her classes.
We do not qualify for financial aid and have serious reservations about spending $90k a year for college. We haven’t ruled it out completely but are struggling to decide which schools might be “worth it” (if any!). We would have to stretch and readjust. It would not be easy. I know from reading that many of you have done the same.
I agree with many posters on CC that we need to sort this out BEFORE she submits her applications. In fact, I’d love to get a better sense of this before we even plan our visits both to potentially save time and money as well as manage her expectations.
Here is our current list:
Yale, Brown, Tufts, Williams, Hamilton, Amherst, Vassar, Haverford, Boston College, Holy Cross, Oberlin, Kenyon, Case Western, William and Mary, Skidmore, U Rochester, Connecticut College, St Olaf.
We are only considering schools beyond a 4 hr. drive if they offer merit aid. She does not want to attend an all-girls college and we do not want her directly in NYC or Philadelphia (we’ve lived in both cities). I realize this is a rather ambitious list. We will make sure she applies to safeties that she really likes.
One of our biggest concerns, having never visited most of these schools, is the balance between serious students/academics and political climate. We’d prefer a campus with minimal political distractions. D is pretty apolitical. She’s very tolerant of different views and perspectives. We would like her around other students who can be respectful of different perspectives as well. While schools like Brown, Vassar, Oberlin and Haverford check a lot of boxes on our list, they have a reputation for being more politically vocal than other schools. We want to be sure we are exploring schools that can offer a positive and well-balanced atmosphere for our daughter.
We have already visited a handful, all self-guided tours:
Weslyan - she did not like the town or campus.
Swarthmore - We all really disliked the general vibe. D just wasn’t comfortable there.
Yale- She really liked everything about it.
Haverford - She also liked and felt very comfortable there.
We’ve tried to prioritize schools that have very strong academics, robust music opportunities (some obviously more than others), and a cooperative/less competitive learning environment. Full price at many of these schools is just so shocking. Then when we begin to compare different schools, for instance Yale vs Haverford, and what they offer for the same price… They are both excellent schools, just very different. Her father is inclined to draw a firm line after Yale and then move to only schools that offer merit. I’d like to think there are a few more on our list that might be worth the money. But that all remains to be seen. We just need to visit, get a feel, and go from there I suppose. I realize this is all very subjective - only we can decide what we value. That being said, I’d really appreciate feedback from folks who may have been in a similar situation and successfully made it to the other side. This all feels a bit surreal at this point.
Are there any must-see schools for a math/music kid that I may have missed? Any schools we may want to prioritize? Deprioritize? Avoid?
Thank you very much for reading this.