<p>I'm thinking about attending Exeter for High School (I'm now entering 8th grade) and I was wondering how conservative the opposite-sex visiting policy is in practice. I know it says stuff about "one shoe-length" and visiting for only 45 minutes in dorms during the evening, but what actually happens?</p>

<p>What do u mean ur thinking of attending exeter??? Exeter is very selective about who they accept u know!! How can you be so confident? anyways i can't help u with ur issue about girls... sadly i'm applying to exeter this year too and have no experiance.</p>

<p>yes, yes I understand that Exeter is very selective. I basically meant I was thinking of applying. You're applying to Exeter this year, too? Where in Canada do you live?</p>

<p>eh, exeter accepts about 17-23% of applicants, so i wouldn't say it's that frightening, as long as you actually want to go there and want the education. pretty much you can't show any serious pda [public display of affection], you need permission to visit opposite sex dorms, and when visiting you need the door halfway open with an advisor "supervising" [which they don't really, they just pass by on occasion. or at least that's what i'm told.]</p>

<p>also plenty of places to hang out with the opposite sex, such as in the academy center, evening prayer [sadly, that's considered a date], or just outside. etc. etc.</p>

<p>thanks. going to evening prayer is considered a date!??! wow!</p>

<p>hahaha. I don't go to Exeter, but I know people that do, and here's an interesting fact about Exeter:</p>

<p>They have a secret club where to join, you have to have sex with someone on the harkness table. There are people in this club, so it's obviously been done before. </p>

<p>Exeter is a pretty promiscuous place. Like most boarding schools. And nobody really listens to the rules about girls/boys, anyway.</p>

exeter accepts about 17-23% of applicants, so i wouldn't say it's that frightening


<p>... unless, of course, one considers that the "typical" applicant pool to an elite prep school such as Exeter (and its peers) is a decidedly self-selecting pool if ever there was one - and, more to the point, is a decidedly "atypical" pool of HSers indeed ... so, while you may think that 23% is quite high - it may not actually be THAT high...</p>

<p>simply put it another way, "jimmy" in the back of the class busy carving his initals on the desk and shooting spitballs isn't likely going to be applying to Exeter anytime soon...</p>

<p>Hey hey if it isn't two people saying things about Exeter that they don't really have all that much first hand experience to back up... since Blee won't be at Exeter until later today for the first time EVER, his understanding of these applicable policies is pretty weak in practice; it's even worse in terms of the technical rules (or lack thereof). Purpoise is a little off the mark with the Harkess Club, too.</p>

<p>Now, as a current Senior AT Exeter, let me take the time to answer this question correctly and clarify any confusion....</p>

<p>EP varies from "sort of a date" to "make out in the back pews of the church." There is a range which you will observe and perhaps participate in if you so choose; it is, of course, wholly optional. There isn't very much date-date type stuff going on because there aren't all that many places to go, sadly.</p>

<p>Harkness Club real quick because this is a fun topic; It's called the "harkness club" and it's not a club, nor is it a secret society. You just say that you have "joined the club" after you've had sex on a table. There are no meetings because it isn't a club; it's just a term which developed after the practice, I assume. Harkness tables are pretty tame places to have sex at school, actually. One girl had sex in the new walk-in freezer of the Grill in the new academy center before it opened. Very impressive. She was kicked out, actually. (Not for that, though)</p>

<p>As for visiting. Official visiting is not all that generous, true. Technically speaking your timeframe would be between 7-8 and then 7-11 on saturday, but that's just for your ROOM. You could go to your significant other's dorm and chill in common rooms as much as you like, any time you're allowed out (i.e., not at 3 am). Visitations are for visiting, not for making out, as you will be told... but that's more of a guideline than anything else. Your experience will vary depending on what dorm you are in. For instance, in my dorm, the faculty are lax and I used to have illegal v's (i.e., visits w/o permission) all the time with female friends. Actual friends, not girlfriends, mind you, but still just as not-allowed. People have gotten in trouble for that before, of course--playing board games in the middle of the afternoon and being caught. </p>

<p>By the way, "visitations" basically would be: go to whatever faculty is "on duty" in that dorm at the time, with the girl, and say "hey, can we get Vs?" and the teacher will then say, "sure" unless they know the girl has 5 papers to write or something like that. </p>

<p>Now, important to mention are "5s." This is what people do most of the time when it comes to illicit sex; 5 am is the first time you are allowed out of the dorm after checkin, and though you're not supposed to be allowed back in until 7 (???) people just go to other dorms and are let in and then do whatever for however long. Hence the term "5s." This happens during assembly a lot, too.</p>

<p>You can have as much PDA as the people around you can stand. My old room mate and his GF last spring were totally out of control with the PDA and people came to ME begging me to make them stop somehow, but I was powerless. So really, no real rules on that.</p>

<p>Statutory rape stuff still applies and the school has to follow through with the cops in those circumstances.</p>

<p>So basically the conservatism of the official policy does not accurately reflect modern times or the reality of the situation, though things vary from faculty to faculty and dorm to dorm. Your experiences will vary. </p>

<p>Andover, I hear, has an amusingly more liberal policy in some ways. The full technical policy is @ the exeter website under the "e-book," which I assume you've seen. Try to get your hands on a copy of the "Sexonian" sex issue, if you can. I don't know if they still do those.</p>

<p>I know I missed a lot of the nuances of the stuff, so, any more questions feel free to PM me.</p>

<p>thanks a lot. That really cleared up some of my questions. And it helps to know that I'm being answered by someone that's ACTUALLY BEEN THERE.</p>

<p>A question for Blee and/or the prestige: Do u know what the average person who get's into exeter is like?? I'm just wondering because I want to apply but I don't think I have a chance at all...:( if u want to see my info./stats etc. My thread thing is called Help!!! What are my chances</p>

<p>A question for Blee and/or the prestige: Do u know what the average person who get's into exeter is like?? I'm just wondering because I want to apply but I don't think I have a chance at all...:( if u want to see my info./stats etc. My thread thing is called Help!!! What are my chances</p>

<p>Well, Blee's been there for about 12 hours now, so maybe he's already had Vs and can speak to them with greater knowledge. Who knows :)</p>

<p>maybe....though I'd be surprised!</p>

<p>bump bump bump</p>

<p>Blee, why have you been there for 12 hours? I don't understand.</p>

<p>Please let this thread die! I'm embarrassed to be its creator.</p>

<p>i wont let this thread die</p>

<p>awww tom!!! i'd be embarrassed about this post, too... that was one of your first concerns you ever posted about exeter!!!</p>

<p>Hmm. What do you think happens when there are eight hundred, whatever the number is, hormone-hyped teens living near in close proximity of each other? </p>

<p>Never mind the rules. This is what happens at every boarding school, every high school. Use your common sense. :)</p>

<p>This is so funny. ;)</p>