<p>I get annoyed when I’m in an aisle seat on an airplane (that I much prefer and went to a lot of effort to ensure I got) and someone asks to change seats with me just so some couple can sit together. </p>
<p>I don’t mind if it’s so a parent can sit next to a young child or a sick or injured person needs an aisle seat for medical reasons, but just the convenience of sitting by your spouse or boyfriend for few hours does not strike me as a compelling reason for me to sit in a less-desirable window seat, or worse yet a middle seat. </p>
<p>I hate being put on the spot this way, because it forces me to choose between two undesirable outcomes: I either make the change against my will or end up sitting next to the person who is angry at me for for refusing to make the change.</p>
<p>So unless you are offering a comparable aisle seat in exchange for my aisle seat, don’t even ask.</p>
<p>When I first strarted attending my church (20+ years ago) the ushers were simply awesome. They were all old military vets and they took the job of seating people very seriously. The ushers my age learned from them, so there are still some good ones, but the younger ones are of the handing out programs variety.</p>
<p>I am claustrophobic to some degree, and I really need to sit in an aisle seat in a plane, where the roof does not curve over my head. I always book one, even if I am not seated with the rest of my party. I’ve never been asked to give one up, but NO WAY am I going to.</p>
<p>I give up my seat if I see an elderly person who looks like they need a seat. Some people in their 60’s and 70’s don’t mind standing and are still in great shape. Some are probably in better shape than people 20-30 years younger than them.</p>
<p>This is such a regional/cultural and manners thing. (For clarification: I am late 50s) We were recently in the south. In the airport the wait was long and there were no seats. I was kind of ok with it (please note: I am a trifecta cancer survivor so I am not strong) because we were going to be seated soon.</p>
<p>A young man saw me and stood up and insisted that I take his seat. I said that I was fine but he insisted.</p>
<p>Today at graduation it was warm and no seats. We were standing in the sun. I was ok for the first two hours until I got a bit woozy. In front of us were young people, seated in the shade. They saw my son grab me and nope…not an offer. Worse: a grandmother was standing near me. She was in distress. </p>
<p>My son ran and got us both water. I was better. She not so much. Those kids (in their late 20s) just sat there. They knew, they saw. They didn’t care.</p>
<p>I never allowed my kids to take a seat in a waiting room if an adult was standing. My pet peeve was having to stand while small children each took up a seat. If one of my kids was sick I held him/her on my lap if there were no seats for the adults.</p>
<p>When pregnant w D, I took public transportation to work. They started new cars the stop before mine, so I usually waited for an empty car unless I could specifically see empty seats when the subway car pulled up. Once I was getting on to a car with just a couple empty seats during the late stages of my pregnancy and was waddling toward the empty seat. A man about my age pushed me aside and took the seat I was aiming for and told me I should be faster next time, leaving me seatless. That was rude. I stepped off the next stop and waited for a new car with available seating.</p>
<p>After navigating with strollers, I always help hold doors for others who are struggling.</p>
<p>Last week was nephew’s college graduation. We got there very early in order to get good seats. They ran out of seats and latecomers had to go to an auxilliary location to watch via live broadcast. I felt sorry for those who had traveled a long distance to not be able to see it in person, but we had driven 4 hours the night before, booked a hotel in advance, arranged for dog care, and arrived early for the morning graduation so we could see my nephew, who was selected to sing during the ceremony. We did not offer our seats to anyone.</p>
<p>I raised my children so that they (and I) will certainly give up seats on public transportation. But for a concert, not so much. I have back issues and can’t stand for hours at a time, and my kids have foot issues that make it hard for them to do the same. Now texting during a concert is a horrific breach of etiquette, and I frankly think they should be asked to leave.</p>
<p>I’m with those who give up their seats on a bus, metro, or doctor’s office, but not for a venue where it’s possible to secure the seat you want by advance planning and arriving early. If there was a frail elderly person or handicapped person who needed my seat at a concert or theater, I’d give up that one seat but wouldn’t expect anyone else in my party to move.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t expect someone who had arrived earlier than I did at a movie theater or open seating event to move to the center of the aisle to accommodate me and I think it’s rude to ask. On airplanes, I thought it was considered pushy to ask anyone to give up a better seat so a party could sit together. If I wanted to sit with my children, I could ask someone to take my aisle seat while I took their middle seat. I could maybe even ask someone to trade aisle seats with me. But I shouldn’t have to give up the seat I took pains to obtain for a worse seat because it would make the flight nicer for someone else. I count, too. I would give up an aisle seat for an elderly person who needed it. Pretty soon I’ll be one of those elderly people everyone is supposed to offer seats to.</p>
<p>Once when the kids were little, we couldn’t get seats together on a flight. D was 5 and sat a row in front of H, but S was 2. No one offered to move, so I put S in his assigned seat and handed his diaper bag to the adult sitting next to him and started giving instructions and directions to where I would be sitting in my assigned seat. Lo and behold, the man offered to switch seats with me!</p>
<p>I vote for booking a flight where at least one of the parents is seated next to the toddler. That way the family isn’t stressed and no other passenger is inconvenienced.</p>
<p>Hmmm…actually in our graduation ceremonies those who got seats walked out of the main graduation early. Christiann Aminpour was talking and LOTS of people went to their department ceremonies. They secured their seats by being rude.</p>
<p>“Once when the kids were little, we couldn’t get seats together on a flight. D was 5 and sat a row in front of H, but S was 2. No one offered to move”</p>
<p>This is not a case when you wait for someone to offer to move. You ask directly. You also ask them to swap with whichever one of you had the most desirable, non-middle seat. You don’t ask them to give up their aisle for your middle seat. I guarantee you NOBODY wants to sit next to your two year old. With or without diaper bag. But not everyone is paying attention and even realizes that you are not sitting near. You can also ask the flight attendant for assistance. You could potentially pay the extra fee to get a premium seat early, or you could call up the airline ahead of time, and plead your case. They will sometimes open up more seats for people who have a good reason. You don’t wait for someone to notice your dilemma.</p>
<p>This was over 16 years ago, before we were booking our own flights online. Our scheduled flight had been cancelled due to weather and we were re-routed. We were put on a flight with 4 available seats. The flight attendant made an announcement about our situation. No one responded, and we were asked to take our seats. I didn’t mean to be rude; my S was actually a delightful toddler and very friendly and probably would have done okay. I think my assigned seat was within two rows of S’s. I was willing to give it a try in our assigned seats since I didn’t have an alternative.</p>