<p>Thank you Hat! I appreciate your info!!</p>
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<p>As a college Dean of Students, I can assure you that virtually every Dean of Students in the country could send that memo out to their freshmen. In fact, many of us have, every fall. (And our predecessors have been sending / saying it since the 17th century!)</p>
<p>Gadad, perhaps I should have been more narrow in what I quoted from the FDO site to more precisely get my point across. </p>
<p>I am not at all dismayed by what the Dean Dingman had to sayâquite the contrary, his message to students was excellent and quite appropriate given the issue he was addressing. </p>
<p>As a parent, what is of concern is the number of Harvard freshman this year he referenced that apparently drank so much they had to been taken to the hospital.</p>
<p>Of course, I am making the assumption that being taken to the hospital for excessive alcohol consumption is not a trivial matter whether that is the 17th century, now, or the 27th century.</p>
<p>I would be dismayed if the deans did not confront the issue of alcohol safety. Like it or not, many, many freshmen will drink, some to excess, and itâs important for their friends to watch out for them.</p>
<p>I suspect Harvard has alot of first-time drinkers in every freshman class. Responsible, high achievers enter into the party culture and need as many tools as possible to exercise some moderation.</p>
<p>Cross-posted w/ above post.</p>
<p>I recall sonâs freshman year (at a different school), he and his hallmates had to ârescueâ two of their peers. One was discovered because they had passed out with their feet sticking out the door of their room.</p>
<p>Hmmm . . . son had a roommate freshman year who did not seem to want rescuing.</p>
<p>I think thatâs a bit strange - this notion that students should âhandleâ their hard-drinking peers.</p>
<p>I think it is not that outrageous for Harvard to simply enforce the law. Drinking under 21 is illegal. Inconvenient. Stupid. Perhaps promotes binge drinking. But honestly, if the school issued some sort of statement along the lines of â Get caught drunk when youâre under 21 and youâre suspended or expelled or whatever they might do â and I think weâd see our extremely driven over-achievers start to avoid alcohol and other assorted fun substances.</p>
<p>So, sewhappy, you have a problem with peers helping each other regulate their behavior?</p>
<p>^ lol</p>
<p>Absolutely, MSMDAD, thatâs exactly what I mean! Every man for himself. No one is their brotherâs keeper, etc.</p>
<p>Surely you jest in your bizarre misinterpretation of my post.</p>
<p>I think that the dean is talking about when a fellow student is truly in danger. Students canât be expected to assume parental roles, but, as I witnessed in the high school setting, they need to help when someone is very sick from excessive alcohol consumption. As for suggesting that Harvard âenforce the lawâ and threaten suspension, I fear if that were the case there would be more alcohol related fatalities due to students not wanting to expose fellow students to the penalties. It is best to do as the dean did and encourage students to take care of each other, it could save lives.</p>
<p>^ Perhaps. Honestly not sure. I certainly agree that if a sober student witnesses an intoxicated student in danger then the thing to do is get them help. Unfortunately, I fear that usually the dangerously intoxicated student will be with other very intoxicated students. So I really donât think the FDOâs plea for âhelp one anotherâ is going to be that useful.</p>
<p>We have family friends who lost their son in an alcohol incident at a different school. We are very sensitized to this issue.</p>
<p>Yes that is a big worry that they all will be too drunk to realize that one of them is not just âpassed outâ but rather suffering from alcohol poisoning. But I do know personally of two students who were saved by their âless drunkâ friends. They called for parental help in one case and an ambulance in the other. Both were taken to the ER and survived. It is very scary and I repeatedly discuss this with my children and hope they are listening so that they will not get themselves in a dangerous situation and will be ready to help if they see someone in trouble. I just hope the Harvard frosh read the deanâs message and took it to heart.</p>
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<p>82% of underage college students acknowledge that theyâve been drinking in the past 30 days. Simply tossing half the campus (or more) out of school is neither practical nor educationally effective.</p>
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<p>No, youâd see a sudden wave of student emergencies and tragedies due to the unwillingness of their peers to call for help, knowing that to do so would get their friend thrown out of school.</p>
<p>âNo, youâd see a sudden wave of student emergencies and tragedies due to the unwillingness of their peers to call for help, knowing that to do so would get their friend thrown out of schoolâ Gadad, as usual I totally agree with you. </p>
<p>Over here, the drinking age is 16- way too young if you ask me and the trickle down effect means that 14 and 15 years olds are doing it. (They serve alcohol at the Prom!) Although I disagree with it, it does accomplish several things. It puts the responsibility on the parents to set and enforce rules and limits, it takes away the âillegalâ aspect of it (for some kids this in itself is a reason to do it!) and it opens up a dialogue with your children on the issues of drinking.
When our kids were going out we knew there would be alcohol at the parties We were able to establish our âfamily rulesâ and have discussion about what to do if someone is excessively drinking etc. On my sonâs first trip out with friends⊠he was not allowed to drink (he was only 15) but it was his friends 16th birthday, we told him what we expected and he complied-luckilyâŠas it turned out the 16 year old drank way too much and my son and another kid who wasnât drinking ended up calling the kids parents and then an ambulance. The Hospital said the kid would have died if they hadnât called. This has made an impression on my son that I think will last a lifetime. In the past few years there have been several incidents where my children and their friends have had to call another kids parent or my husband and I (when they couldnât reach the kids parents) to help them in a situation when one of their friends has had too much. The discussions afterwards were always eye opening and we never had to warn about the dangers of drinking, the stupid behavior or gross side effects of overdrinking. They saw it first hand. Luckily for us our son was totally turned off by his friends excessive drinking. If it had been illegal or the kids would have gotten in trouble, I think the kids would have hesitated to call parents or responsible adults, Because no one was breaking a law and the parents knew their kids were drinking, the stigma was taken away and the parents were able to deal with their kids drinking problem within the family. The other âgood thingâ is that drinking or choosing not to drink is no big deal with their peers here. No peer pressure to drink to be cool. I will add that you canât drive till you are 18 here and most kids donât get their licenses till their 20âs (very expensive). I personally think 16 is too young but I do think 21 is too old. It blows my mind that you can join the military, risk your life to defend our rights and even die for your country at 18 but you canât drink till you are 21. Rambling again. Just thought Iâd share the experience here.</p>
<p>For the college tour for 9 & 11 year oldâMoshi at the bubble tea place, and Berry line, of course! 
There is also a cool store in Cambridge, near the Harvard store, with all kinds of gadgets and toysâwe call it the âuseful thingsâ shop, but I canât remember the exact name.</p>
<p>I see that Iâve jumped to the wrong conclusion by assuming Harvard looks the other way at alcohol use as our state U does:</p>
<p>[Drugs</a> and Alcohol](<a href=âhttp://webdocs.registrar.fas.harvard.edu/ugrad_handbook/current/chapter5/drugs_alcohol.html]Drugsâ>http://webdocs.registrar.fas.harvard.edu/ugrad_handbook/current/chapter5/drugs_alcohol.html)</p>
<p>This seems like a sensible policy that seeks to protect the students as much as possible.</p>
<p>And thankfully Harvard includes the below in its policy. This âAmnesty Policyâ saves lives.
"Amnesty Policy</p>
<p>Any student may bring an intoxicated or drug-impaired friend to Harvard University Health Services or to a hospital, or seek assistance from College residential life staff or HUPD, and by doing this, neither they nor the friend will face disciplinary action from the College for having used or provided alcohol or drugs. Further, if the person who sought assistance for the intoxicated or drug-impaired student was a member or guest of the student group involved, the College will weigh this fact heavily as a mitigating circumstance with respect to any potential disciplinary action. Conversely, the College will consider the failure to seek assistance by members of the student group as a factor when determining the appropriateness of disciplinary action. The College also may consider as mitigating factors the student groupâs participation in the Collegeâs annual education and training about responsible social events, as well as any efforts made by the hosts or officers to prevent the harmful or potentially harmful situation and their cooperation with the College in its investigation of the situation. "</p>
<p>^ Oh, that makes me feel LOTS safer having a kid there.</p>
<p>As a parent of a Harvard freshman I am really impressed with the presence of âadultsâ in the studentâs lives. I like the way there are proctors in each dorm-son has a fellow in psych living among 25 other entry mates. It seems like at many schools kids are left to themselves more. Not that the proctors are policemen-I just think they offer some nurturing, role modeling as well as encouragement to behave maturely.</p>
<p>Bâsmom, Agree with you, sonâs proctor this year and Dâs last year is/was a great addition to the hall, a bit older but still young enough that the kids feel comfortable going to them with any problem. Sonâs proctor is particularly gifted in getting kids involved in intramurals and socializing with one another, he really has a great one! Plans lots of Dorm activities which has really helped the dorm to become close.</p>
<p>SewHappy⊠Ok we have established I can be a bit denseâŠare you being ironic or do you like the policy? </p>
<p>curious 77- Thanks for posting, I like this policy. I have always valued the idea of learning by our mistakes rather than being punished for them. When kids are able to go to responsible authorities in times of crisis without the fear of reprecussions they are more likely to do so. Get the kids safe, and save the lecture for later.</p>
<p>Ok here is a question, 11th grader got a Membership confirmation from the âNational Society of High School Scholarsâ. Is this society for real or just another organization that people use as a resume padder. My older kids also got "Membership confirmations but I threw them away. 11th grader just got one, nominated by her guidance counselor who feels we should send them our 60 dollars to âjoinâ. We get âstuff like thisâ all the time which we generally ignore but GC specifically asked us to let her know when D received it. (Maybe she gets a cut, ha ha) Are there any benefits other than padding the resume, not interested if that is the case, Anyone???</p>