<p>Oy! Oy!!! This is rough. It almost sounds like you’d need all 4 sibs to come to a consensus together that – as a group – you conclude she needs to accept some for-pay services, because, as a group, you just can’t do all of this. Any one sib doesn’t have enough excuses to cover the territory. And the brother who needs to look for work needs to be given the same allowance as the employed sibs. We can all understand that “finding a job is a fulltime job” – what we say to new college grads. So the employed sibs need to stand up for the unemployed one, that he not be pressed into becoming their caregiver to the detriment of finding work.</p>